Hal Pictures Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!: August 2007

Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!

Now with Guy Gardner's Seal of Approval!

Friday, August 31, 2007

What the...?

So...I was going through my Photobucket stuff, and cleaning out things, and rediscovering all kinds of weird stuff. And I came across THIS!

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Let me just state for the record that I have absolutely NO clue about where this is from, or exactly what it is that they are referring to. But isn't it nice that Hal and Barry are such close...er...friends.

Oh, and that whole "jiving Starbreaker" thing? Hal, it NEVER works when you try to use slang. You're a REPUBLICAN for heaven's sake...try and act like it!

Thursday, August 30, 2007

A General Critique

Well...that was a rather odd new Comics day. No new Green Lantern books, which has me in a state of mild depression. A passel of new "Countdown" related books that were ok, the final episode to "Amazons Attack" which was a bit on the wierd side, a new Wonder Woman, which tied in with the aforesaid "Amazons Attack" book, and finally Teen Titans, which I NEVER read, and only bought because it had Blue Beetle on the cover.

Countdown was worth it however, because they had the Origin on Parallax in the back, as drawn by Ivan Reis, so I got a tiny dose of GL goodness to tide me over the hump as it were.

I was a tad on the confused side with Amazons Attack. Isn't the point of a six-part mini-series to tell a self-contained story? The end of this was yet another Cliffhanger! A doozy, I'll grant you that, and yet...what the heck? I can't help but think that much of this could have all been accomplished in only a couple of issues...this did seem to drag on and on and on. On the other hand, I am glad that they didn't end up killing Hyppolita, which would have depressed me even more.

There are spoilers here, for those of you, who have not read Amazons Attack or Wonder Woman. It turns out that the whole megilla, was a "test" created by the Goddess Athena, and the Amazons apparently flunked. So Hyppolita ends up being exiled alone, back to Themyscira, and all the rest of the Amazons get their memories erased, while Circe is shoved back into Hell.


Except, that Athena isn't REALLY Athena at all...she's none other than Granny Goodness! Wha...? you may say? I wasn't aware that Granny Goodness had the power and ability to be able to imprison the actual Greco/Roman pantheon, imitate the Goddess Athena and do all of the other rather impressive things that she did. On the other hand, this was hinted at rather broadly in one of those images that were on Newsarama a while back, so I should have been less surprised than I was.

Then in Wonder Woman, Nemesis no longer remembers that Diana is actually DIANA, so the status quo has been reistablished there as well. She ends up having a fight with Everyman, who I am beginning to find both ubiquitous and annoying, and she and Nemesis do eventually find Sgt. Steel which is nice for him.

I'll tell you the one book that I was actually impressed with, and that was the Countdown Tie-In, "Five of a Kind" one with Grace and Wonder Woman. This is Batman playing his games again, and trying to find the best people to be in his newly recreated Outsiders team. Obviously Wonder Woman ISN'T going to be in it, but it still wasn't too bad. It gave Grace some nice moments, and she and Diana seemed to be bonding rather well. Apparently Grace is still part Bana, so that makes her and Diana sort of cousins. AND they save Cleveland, which is also a good thing. And Zinda has a cameo, flying them around and I LOVE Zinda.

So Batman finally gets his team together, which consists of Grace, Katanna, Metamorpho and the oddest looking Martian Manhunter that I've ever seen...just in time to have them save the day and end up being hated and feared for it. Well isn't THAT just ducky.

Batman is starting to annoy me again.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

A Thank You would be Niced

Eep! It's Wednesday already, and I have to clean the house for the Fife and Drum practice and picnic tomorrow! I don't know about the rest of the country, but in New England, we simply adore getting dressed up in Revolutionary War outfits, and marching in parades, banging on our drums and tootling on our fifes. All of this of course, is merely the means to an end...which is the BEER GARDEN! Mostly they march in Volunteer Firemen parades, which usually have a carnivale and BEER GARDEN as a way to raise money for the Fire Department.

Which leads me in a roundabout way, to the point of my premise for today. When Superman or Batman or the Justice League or whomever saves the world, or Metropolis, or Star City, or Wilkes Barre...do the grateful citizens ever throw them a nice parade?

Parades are fun. Why my town has them at the drop of a hat. Heck we have a parade just to celebrate opening day for Little League! We have one at Christmas in the snow, with all the fire Trucks decorated with Christmas lights. We freeze our collective asses off and then go and drink hot chocolate.

But a SUPER parade could be a heck of a lot of fun. Green Lantern could make floats and stuff with his ring, or Batman could whip up various incarnations of the Batmobile and decorate them with black and yellow balloons. Superman could make popcorn with his heat vision. The souviner sales ALONE would keep the Justice Hall open for another few months. If it were in Star City, Green Arrow could give himself the key to the city. They could throw tickertape from the Daily Planet.

I want to see Wonder Woman sitting in a gaudy 1950's red convertible with tail fins and white leather upholstery, waving serenely at the crowds. Of course every tinpot, half-assed villain would use this opportunity to attack, and then the heroes could round them all up with a minimum of effort and deposit them in jail at the conclusion.


Just simple thankyou for saving the world once again.

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

The Desert Peach

And now for something a little different. I don't know how many of you are familiar with the work of Donna Barr, but she is the creator, writer and artist for "The Desert Peach" and also for "Sintz". Her work is in heavy black inks, and all done in black and white. It is also heavily stylized, but bursting with energy and fun. And she can draw feet. Beautiful feet as a matter of fact. Pretty horses too.

The idea behind the Desert Peach, is that he is the younger gay brother of Erwin Rommel, the reknowned Desert Fox of Afrika Corps fame during WWII. Frankly, you wouldn't think a book about Nazis could be funny, but it is. It also combines some hilarious and scathing political commentary.

This is Manfred Phirsich Marie Rommel.

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As you can see, he's awfully pretty. And there is just something about a man in riding boots.


Anyway, he's the Colonel and commanding officer of te 469th Halftrack, Gravedigging and Support Unit for the Afrika Corps, which is under the command of his famous brother Erwin in 1941. The 469th is a bit of an...oddball unit to say the least, basically staffed by all the misfits and oddballs it can find. You have Doberman, who is basically delusional, who carries a live land mine around with him at all times that he's named "Fridl" There is Udo Schmidt, who is the Peach's Orderly, who it turns out is the ONLY actual party member in the entire unit, and he only joined when he was a teen because they were giving out free beer. There is Kjars Winzig, who is the self-appointed "Political Officer", who goes around handing out copies of "Mein Kampf", but never actually JOINED the Nazi Party, because they required you to pay dues.

And so on and so forth. The have a captured American prisoner named Jeff Holz, who is from Milwakee and speaks lovely old-fashioned German. He gets put in charge of writing the Unit's newspaper, and keeps trying to sneak pro-Allied propaganda past Pfirshich. It never happens, but he keeps trying. He shares a tent and ends up being best friends with the slightly rabid Kjars Winzig. They have a Catholic chaplain, who finds it annoying to try and deal with a bunch of Lutherans, but he manages to cope.

Being gay, Pfirshich is always in danger from the SS and the Powers That Be in Berlin, since they don't approve of such people. His brother manages to keep him out of trouble to a certain degree, and Pfirshich also manages to look out for Erwin, who may a great general, but who had a certain degree of naivetee when it came to Hitler. The Author doesn't shrink from confronting the tough questions, but still manages to present her characters as decent human beings, who have move in common than not, with their enemies. Donna Barr goes from the palmy early days of the war, right through the defeat and devastion of Germany, and on after the war.

However, along with the tough political and moral questions, she also adds a great deal of charm and wit to the book. There is a scene in one of the early stories that has the two Rommel brothers surfing on coffin lids in the Mediterranean, looking for Allied submarines that will have you choking with laughter.

A warning is necessary, this is NOT for kids. And it is definitely twisted and unnusual. But funny. DAMNED funny.

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Monday, August 27, 2007

The Anatomy Lesson

No, not Rembrandt's. I am actually speaking of certain artists who desperately need to learn how to actually draw a human body...male OR female. So feast your eyes on THIS!

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I slithered over to Comic Book Resouces Presents, and stumbled across their "Judging books by their covers" entry for the upcoming month of November, for Marvel. This, as you may be able to judge, is going to be the cover for something with Namor in it.

This is really really...terrible. It isn't very nice of me to say that of course. And for all I know, Michael Turner is a very nice man. But this is bad. Very bad. Rob Liefeld bad. Look...no feet!
It isn't right that Namor's arms are the same size as his thighs...not to mention his torso. Even taking stylelization into account, this is an odd rendering.

I rather like Namor. He's the only one of the Illuminati who isn't being portrayed as being a complete moron, and or Fascist. Sure, he's a little on the cranky side, but he has things on his mind. Besides, I'm a Guy Gardner fan. I LIKE assholes apparently.

You know who did a great job drawing Namor? Kevin Maguire in the Defenders mini-series. Not only was that a hoot and a half, but it had Namor with the most magnifient series of sneers that I have ever seen.

I guess I just don't understand the appeal of Mr. Turner's art. His women are all grotesquely waifish, with eyes the size of saucers and these strange elongated torsos. We've all seen the picture of poor Power Girl, so I won't inflict it upon you again. The men all have these bizarre cheekbones that can slice bread. The muscles have muscles.

Maybe I'm just being too picky, but although I like Namor, I'm not sure that I can bring myself to pick this up, although I must admit that my willpower always wilts when I'm standing in front of the shelves at my beloved comic book store. Because as much as I enjoy a well-written story, I do like to demand decent art to go with it.

Or it could be that I'm just feeling cranky today.

Saturday, August 25, 2007

Dog Days

Blurg. While the rest of the country has been sweltering under oppressive heat and humidity, it wasn't too bad in New England. In fact, it was pretty darned gorgeous. Unfortunately that is at an end, and it is really revolting out today. What to do, what to do, to take my mind off the stickiness that is bearing down like a big gray blanket?

I think I'll discuss Green Arrow. I've been enjoying the heck out of the new series, that goes back and reexamines Oliver Queen's origin. Ollie may have been an ass, but my goodness, he was an ENTERTAINING ass.

In issue #4, he's been helped by one of the workers of the hidden opium plantation, on the remote island where he washed up, after his attempted murder by his supposed friend and employee. Ollie has unfortunately broken his arm rather badly, and is given opium to help with the pain. Also unfortunately, he becomes hooked rather quickly, and has to go through a painful detox completely on his own.

There has been a certain amount of discussion about this retcon. Originally I believe that it was marijuana, it has since been changed to opium, which actually makes a lot more sense nowadays. However, if Ollie had to deal with an addiction, then why was he so obnoxious to poor Speedy when he discovered that his ward had become a JUNKIE? Doesn't that make him the worst kind of hypocrite?

Well...yes, I suppose that it does. However, it must be also observed that Oliver Queen is a deeply flawed hero. Yes, he's brave, handsome and charming, and he goes out and risks his life to fight the bad guys armed with a bow and a lot of trick arrows. He's ALSO loud, pushy, an inveterate flirt, demanding, and has this rather bad habit of fathering a lot of illegitimate children and then running in the opposite direction. He is a cad, and furthermore keeps calling Hal a Nazi, which REALLY has to grate after a while. There's a reason that Hal went all Parallax on everybody, and Ollie has to stand up for his share of the blame.

There is also no doubt at all that he treated Roy very poorly. The kid was neglected, lonely and confused, and Ollie certainly didn't help. Ollie also has a tendancy to not notice what is under his own nose. Then he threw poor Speedy out, and the kid had to rely on Dinah and Hal for comfort and help...not Oliver.

However...and there is always a however...I can actually understand Ollie's reaction BETTER, if it turns out that he himself had a problem with addiction. Have you ever known anyone who has given up a bad habit? A former drinker, a former smoker, etc? A LOT of people go to the opposite extreme when confronted with evidence of their former vices. I am not a smoker, but I have known those who were, and believe me, they can be very intolerant when exposed to fumes from some hapless smoker.

Ollie knows from experience how insidious the drug was, and how hard it was to kick the habit, therefore I can understand his horror at seeing Roy using it. There would be anger that Roy would voluntarily take up this terrible habit, and perhaps a little bit of shame and guilt that he had fallen so quickly himself. Plus, as far as I can tell, Ollie isn't very good at taking responsibility for things. He ran as far and fast as he could when he Conner was born, and rather than try and help Speedy, he just ran again. Ollie likes to confront other people about injustices, but he isn't too good about confronting himself.

He is getting better though, and it is probably because of Dinah. That's one of the reasons that I am in favor of the wedding...other than I am just an old softie and LOOOOVE weddings. He needs someone to keep him on the straight and narrow. His perpetual adolescence seems to be finally ending...and it's about time.

Friday, August 24, 2007

Oracle makes a mistake...!

Oops. I know it's hard to believe, but Oracle has made a mistake, and believe you me, it's a humdinger. In "Birds of Prey" #109, Barbara and Dinah are sitting around and having girl talk. As you may know, Ollie has asked Dinah to marry him, and good friend that she is, Babs is trying to talk her out of it. This PROVES that Babs is a good friend, because Ollie really is something of a screw-up when it comes to relationships. Not as bad as Hal, because that would be impossible, but he has this nasty little habit of cheating on Dinah occasionally. Oh, and he hits on anything that walks and has breasts too.

Even Barbara...at least back when she COULD walk. And as he's moving in for the clinch, she bursts into hysterical laughter and points out that he smells like her Dad. Now THAT'S the way to break the mood! Dinah isn't entirely happy that Babs is telling her all of this, which is when they begin to go back and forth on Ollie's merits, or lack of the same.

"Dinah, I know what he means to you. This isn't easy for me to say, but..."

"But what?" asks Dinah.

"You KNOW what! He CHEATED on you for Christ's sake!"

"Just how much do you know about me and Ollie?"

"It's my business to know stuff Dinah. He fathered Connor with that NINJA woman for starters."

"Shado shot him and drugged him. Ever wonder how he felt about being raped?"

This whole bit of dialogue delights and enrages me all at the same time. As has been pointed out quite a bit lately, Shado IS NOT Connor's mother. Hah! Even Oracle can make a mistake! Or in this case, the writer, Tony Bedard made a mistake. He manned up and admitted it, and apologized for it, so I'm hoping in a future issue, this will be addressed, and Dinah will tease Barbara for years about making such a basic blunder. This is going to be hard to live down.

On the other hand, they actually came out and admitted that Ollie had indeed been raped by Shado. And it's high time!

There is quite a bit of other good stuff in this episode. Knockout and Scandal are having SUCH a good time at a seedy motel, until Scandal opens her big mouth and makes Knockout feel that she has to go and beat on Barda for a while. Meanwhile, Barda is playing Pokemon with Sin and having a ball, which confuses the heck out of Misfit.

I am depressed that Knockout ends up being murdered by the guy who is going around picking off all of the New Gods. That is a plot that REALLY didn't need to be examined. Why the desperate need to kill off a bunch of perfectly good Jack Kirby characters? They weren't hurting anyone. Well, maybe Darkseid was, but that's his job for heaven's sake!

Please don't kill Barda or Scott.

For the first post-Gail Simone issue, this was pretty darned good. With the small exception of Oracle opening her mouth and inserting her foot anyway. And of course, the art was lovely as usual with Nicola Scott.

I suppose in a way, this isn't such a bad thing. Shows that Oracle can make mistakes like the rest of us. And it was a doozy!

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Green Lantern Corps #15

I'm just going to come out and say it, if you aren't reading the whole Sinestro Corps thingie, that is running through Green Lantern and Green Lantern Corps, then you are missing the story of the year. Two weeks ago, we had Green Lantern, and the fight on Qward with Hal and Kylellax as well as the lost Lanterns.

Now, two weeks later and it is the Green Lantern Corps turn. Mogo is being threatened by the sentient city Ranx, and the Guardians are practically pooping in their little pants, because it all ties into the prophecy made years ago...the Blackest Night.

Green Man has been newly reunited with his partner Stel, who miraculously survived his destruction, and they are on Mogo, the three of them against Ranx, Arikillo and HOARDES of Sinestro Corp members. Stel calculates that the odds against them are roughly sixteen thousand to one. Fortunately, Mogo's little partner Bzzzd shows up, so the odds are improved.

Not to worry, Kilowog and most of our favorites show up, including Sodom Yat, who is being nursemaided by Arisia. And we finally hear just WHY Mogo is so damned important to the Corps. Without him, the rings have no way to find new owners. Mogo's power guides the rings to potential recruits.

I can see why Sinestro wants him taken out of the picture!

What happens next is of course a huge space battle of enormous proportions. Pat Gleason does all of this with his usual panache of course. And who should show up, but Chthos Chthas Chtatis! I LOVE him! He teamed up with Guy against Ranx quite a few issues ago, and it complete sense for him to be here, since he's actually fought against Ranx.

Turns out that Ranx likes to hold a grudge. And he's pissed...REALLY pissed at Guy. Now that's a battle that I am looking forward to! Arkillo is calling in all the big guns, and including those creepy little Children of the White Lobe.

Chthos is filling in Kilowog in the meantime. Turns out that Ranx has Gravity Disruptors, that can punch through Mogo's crust and expose his soft gooey filling. The rest of the Lanterns are fighting like mad of course, while Salakk calls Arisia for an update on how Sodom Yat is doing. She is just a TAD busy at the moment, trying not to be killed, and Sodom saves her from being stung by a nasty little Sinestro Scorpion. By now they've all realized that the Children of the White Lobe are there to mount a suicide attack on Mogo, setting off their bombs by their own willpower.

And finally...finally we get Arkillo vs Kilowog, and it is a thing of beauty. But they realize that they need to get the offensive back, fighting a defensive war is not going to end well. Kilowog sends Stel, Isamot, Sodom Yat and Chthos to invade Ranx. Arisia wants to go as well, trying to do what Salakk ordered her to do, which is keep an eye on Sodom, but Kilowog wants her with him instead.

And that is our cliffhanger. We end up switching to the Guardians who are moping around, back on Oa. The art is provided for the last couple of pages by Angel Unzueta, and I must say, that although his style is quite different from Pat Gleason's, it is VERY nice. Reminiscent to me at least of Ivan Reis, which is certainly not a bad thing.

Ganthet seems surprised that the Guardians have set Sodam Yat against the Sinestro Corps, while the other Guardians are being pretty snarky about it. The others think that the Demons of Ysmault want them to be paralyzed by fear, so they are going to act instead...and rewrite the Book of Oa. I'm not sure how this is going to turn out, but Ganthet doesn't look particularly happy.

Finally, we have a scene of the Lost Lanterns back on Qward, still searching for the Ion entity. They see a light at the end of the tunnel, and ...!
Green Lanterns

Oh crap.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Is this...the END of the Super Friends?

Read the Justice League issue, that is apparently Mr. Meltzer's swan song with some mixed feelings. It wasn't terrible...it was just...bland, I suppose. His entire run has been on the bland side, so I am looking forward with great anticipation to the arrival of Dwayne McDuffie.

Everyone takes their turn at Monitor Duty at the newly-built Hall of Justice, while being secretly watched by a mysterious duo, who also comment about what is going on. It must be a little bit creepy to know that your every move is being monitored. Ordinarily I would suspect that Batman, once again sucumbing to his raging paranoia, had bugged the new headquarters. Of course that may very well be the case, but there seems to be another set of eyes and ears as well.

We get to see "Reddy" who is becoming even more boring and unlikeable than before wander around for a while. Kendra shows up and discovers that Roy has a kid. Roy shows up with Lian, who is wearing the cutest little Speedy outfit you ever did see! Then Black Canary plays the harmonica to improve her "breath" control. She also gets a little territorial over Roy and tells Kendra that she had better not hurt him...or else. So of course Roy and Kendra jump into the sack and get discovered by Reddy. It doesn't seem to bother them very much. It IS a good thing that he had the forethought to take Lian home first.

Then Geoforce wanders around and confronts Deathstroke who is apparently behind all of his current problems, but they aren't going to do anything about it for the time being. Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman talk amongst themselves a bit. Vixen confesses that she can't channel animals anymore, and this makes some sort of impression on Geoforce. Hal and Wally have male bonding.

It turns out that the mysterious couple watching all this nonstop action and excitement are none other than Martian Manhunter and Aquaman. They are just ready and waiting to jump into action themselves, once the League NEEDS them again. I thought that Aquaman was a tentacle monster, and J'onn was hanging out disguised at Checkmate, but what do I know?

I DO know that if Giffen and DeMatteis had been writing this, there would have been a hell of a lot more going on, even with this bunch of characters. There would have been snappy dialogue, misunderstandings, and Geoforce would have been portrayed as a utter boob. J'onn would have been chain-munching chocos and Aquaman would have had that pained look on his face. Kendra and Dinah would have been MUCH cattier, something would have gotten broken, and Batman would have to stand around snarling. AND they would have defeated the Royal Flush Gang inbetween it all.

I have rather enjoyed some of the small character-driven moments that Mr. Meltzer has provided. It also seems to make some sense that with all these rather disparate characters gathered together, that they would pair off into their own little cliques, such as the Big Three, and Dinah, Hal and Roy...and now probably Wally all together. It does leave the others out in the cold a bit however. But Reddy is just BORING, and Geoforce, although he aspires to be obnoxious can't even begin to attain the level of jerkiness held by Guy Gardner back when he was brain-dead. Brion actually HAS his brains, which just makes it more pitiful.

There was always the feeling with this latest incarnation of the Justice League, that at any moment...eventually...possibly SOMETHING was finally going to happen! However, not much really did. Reddy was human for a little while, now he's an android again. Big Whoop. There was that crossover with the Justice Society, where they all ran around and looked like chickens with their heads cut off for a while. Then Roy and Mari got stuck underwater in a collapsing building, which was claustrophobic, but they got out.

We need L-Ron.

Monday, August 20, 2007

Filial Devotion

Well, I had a very nice weekend. Sweet Sixteen birthday party for my daughter, and had family and friends over for hamburgers and bratwurst and stuff in the gazebo. Played croquet and had a bonfire in the firepit, the weather was lovely and a delightful time was had by all. So what set this particular weekend apart in my mind?

My Father, who is an incorrigable tag-sale/garage sale devotee, found a guy selling comic books down the street, for a quarter a book. Although he doesn't read comic books, he knows that I do, so, being my good sweet ol' Dad, he wandered over and picked up a nice bunch of them for me and brought them to the picnic.

A 90's Ironman, a Superman, a couple of Wolverines, and a bunch of Green Lantern Corps from the 80's which was VERY nice. Not very good shape, but who cares...they were a quarter! As for the Green Lantern Corp books, I had most of them, but a couple of them I did not, and so I was very glad to acquire them.

BUT...nestled within the little pile was a true gem. The Annual #2, of Tales of the Green Lantern Corps from 1986! I had never read this before, and it is a dandy!

It opens with a bunch of spaaaaaaace criminals in their Sciencells, being annoyed by Sinestro who is ALSO imprisoned. He keeps talking to what appears to be an empty cell, and it is driving the other inmates nuts. Sinestro after telling the rest of them that they are losers and don't appreciate his genius, then tells them that the cell is ACTUALLY occupied by T:D:H:D! A God-like creature who beCAME Sector 3600...the Ultimate Sector! This creature completely consumed his own sector and was spilling over into the neighboring sectors, causing a great deal of chaos. The Guardians dispatched their greatest Lanterns to oppose it, but they were killed. Finally, the Guardians themselves went and confronted Sector 3600, and after a great deal of effort, managed to containt the entity in a matrix made from pure willpower. It is this entity, that Sinestro has been talking to, and apparently telling stories to.

Naturally, the other inmates think that Sinestro is off his rocker. They scoff at him for telling the creature "bed-time" stories. Au contraire, says Sinestro! He's actually telling him Wake-Up stories...if he can convince the God that if only for an instant that his imprisonment is all in his own mind...then he can be free!

Oh Sinestro, you never cease to amaze me.

So Sinestro then proceeds to tell three more stories to the God, INCLUDING the Alan Moore tale with Abin Sur, Ysmault, the prophecy, Ranx and all that good stuff that is being so heavily referenced right now in the Sinestro Corp books! Woohoo!

Seriously, amazing stuff. The Guardians are STILL acting stupidly.

Finally, it all works, and the God loses his concentration for a second, just long enough for Sinestro to escape from his Sciencell! The other inmates are amazed and thrilled...until Sinestro with an evil smile on his face, slams the doors closed again. The rest of them didn't believe him, so they don't deserve to be free. Sinestro struts off, free to wreak both havok and vengeance on Hal Jordan and the Green Lantern Corps. The final panel shows the other inmates desperately trying to come up with stories to regale the once again comatose God-Creature in the cell.

And the lesson learned is that there is some darned good stuff lurking out there! And that I just love my Dad.

Saturday, August 18, 2007


Still basking in the glow from Booster Gold, I MUST recommend wandering over to Newsarama and reading the "Booster on Booster" interview. It is really a hoot and a half. AND read the comments.

Must go and make potato salad.

Friday, August 17, 2007

Dear John...er...Marvel

I hate to have to come right out and say it, my dear, but it's over. Finito. The end. Oh sure, we had some laughs over the years...too many for me to even count. You were my first love after all. DC was just too stodgy, too sweet and sunny. You...you were dangerous. You were a teenaged "bad boy" and therefore irresistable. You took your heroes and made them fight. You added giant vats of angst and emotion and soap opera, and I loved it.

I read X-men. Hell, I bought Giant-Sized X-Men off the spinner rack at the Drug store. You remember, back in the old days. And it was great. I liked Thor, and Avengers, and Wolverine and Spider-Man and Conan, and then X-Men started to multiply like dandylions, and I bought every single one of them...even the Liefeld ones, because I was HOOKED, baby!

I'm not even sure that I can pinpoint the exact moment when I realized that somehow the bloom was off of the rose. But somehow it just wasn't as satisfying, and I started to stray. Yes, I cheated. I slithered over to the DC corner of the Comic book store and quietly, surreptitiously, started reading. It started small of course, these sort of affairs always do. But Giffen and DeMatteis's Justice League made me laugh, and it had been a while since you made me laugh. And then I started to realize that heroes can actually like each other and well...BE heroes to the populace. I got tired of being hated and feared by everyone. And after Jean died AGAIN, it started to get old.

"Civil War" pretty much killed it however. I looked at you and realized that I didn't even KNOW you anymore. When did you get so mean? So vindictive and nasty? Not to mention incoherent. I just don't understand you any more. I got the latest issues of Wolverine and Wolverine: Origins...and I couldn't make heads or tails out them. And we've been together for SUCH a long time, and it's so hard to just let you go, but it has to be done.

Oh, I'll hang around a little tiny bit. Nextwave was delicious, and I almost decided it was enough...but it wasn't. The thrill is gone. I'll probably still pick up Ultimate Spider-Man, because it is still fun and witty. I hear that Captain America is supposed to be good. But I'm heading over to the bright and shiny part of the Comic Book aisle. Things like Green Lanterns and the Sinestro Corps, "52", Booster Gold, the Justice Society, Blue Beetle, "I Can't Believe It's Not The Justice League", Birds of Prey, Flash, Checkmate, old JLI issues...It's just so much more appealing. Yeah, there is death and destruction and violence and rape and brutish thuggery in the DC universe as well as yours...a little TOO much for my liking, but at least there is also a little bit of hope and humor as well.

So...it's over. I know you'll survive without me, you have all those people who like the "Heroes for Hire" cover afterall. But please pardon me if I don't want to hang around and watch you kill off Mary Jane, so that Joe Quesdada can write about Spider-Man downloading porn and having casual sex. If that is to my taste, I can go read Nightwing insead.



Thursday, August 16, 2007

Booster Gold #1

Booster Gold

Well...it's finally out. The expectations that I had leading up to this first issue, were quite high of course, and I'm pleased to say that I think that Mr. Johns, Mr. Katz and Mr. Jurgens hit it right out of the ballpark. Yes, I'm pleased as punch, happy as a clam, and thrilled to pieces. TO PIECES!

For a minute or two there, it is like picking up an old copy of JLU, because Booster is fighting none other than the Royal Flush Gang! Be still my heart. A bit of history follows, who Booster is, what has happened to him, and a quick summing up of "52", which makes a nice nod to the novice reader.

Then the Justice League shows up.

Booster needs to do SOMEthing, and joining the Justice League seems like the right thing to do. He WAS in it for quite a while after all. Something that some of the newer, younger members don't seem to realize. In fact, Vixen and Roy are a bit on the snarky side. Booster explains that he took out the Royal Flush Gang, while Wally comments that he thought they had deactivated his communicator. Black Lightning replies, that no, that was Guy Gardner's. Haw! Then Roy says that at least Guy has balls, which will make me love him forever.

Black Canary and Hal are being a little on the suspicious side as well, Dinah points out that defeating the Royal Flush Gang is exactly the way that Booster joined the League in the FIRST place. Booster does point out that in all fairness, Max Lord was the one pulling strings in that case, and "we ALL know what a "good guy" he turned out to be. Just ask Wonder Woman."

Oh Michael, you didn't REALLY say that? He does have the good grace to look abashed and mumble a "sorry" as Wonder Woman does a slow burn behind him.

Meanwhile, Canary is still giving him some attitude, and even brings up the whole Kooey Kooey Kooey fiasco, which really isn't very sporting of her. Superman does point out that Booster threw himself between Superman and Doomsday, which is nice of him. This goes on for a little while, with everyone discussing Booster's strengths and weaknesses, when wonder of wonder, Batman actually stands up for him, which made my jaw drop in sheer awe. Batman says that he has a week to prove himself. If he does well...then they'll flip a coin.

So, filled with determination, Booster flies off to Daniel's house. Daniel as you will all recall from "52" is Booster's idiot ancestor. He just hangs out playing video games and won't take off the Supernova suit for some reason. Even Booster thinks he's an idiot, and that' saying something.


And who should show up put Rip Hunter. Poor Booster, he thought that all the saving time stuff was over and done with, but no such luck. Booster just wants to join the Justice League,and garner a little respect, but Rip points out that although they DID save the Multiverse, there are still...problems. Anomalies. TEMPORAL anomalies. And in one of my favorite moments, he says this...

..."Everything in History predating the re-creation of the Multiverse has gone malleable. Thanks mostly to Mr. Mind and that Kryptonian boy's tantrums, which I still find RIDICULOUS to believe. punching history. PLEASE."

Heh. In fact, that actually calls for a hearty Bwhahahahaha! Geoff Johns, I love you.

So, off they go, Rip and Booster, out to fix time. Booster ends up back in time saving a jetliner that was about to crash due to Black Adam having blasted through a wing. Coincidentally there is an attractive young woman investigative reporter who is saved...who turns out to be his great great great great...whatever grandmother. Now Rip lays it out for Booster. He can go back and join the League, or he can fulfill his destiny and go down in history as "an ineffectual and incompetent fraud, when in reality you'll be the greatest hero, History has ever known".

Booster of course is pissed because he really doens't want to be known forever as a joke, and what good is it being a great hero if nobody knows about it? Rip points out that Booster will know, but he's not sure that's enough. So, Rip acceeds to Booster's wishes, and drops him off one week later, at the headquarters for the Justice League.

To Booster's delight, they've decided to vote him in, and hand him a nice plaque all framed up and every thing. The Justice League really goes all out. Too bad they don't have a secret handshake. Everyone seems pretty happy with the decision, although Roy still has a sour look on his face. As Booster looks at his nice new certificate however, there is a flash of light, and it changes right in front of him, into a death certificate for Hal Jordan. Booster is understandably bemused by this, but Skeets points out that he sees it too, although nobody else seems to be picking up on it. There is a lovely moment as Booster just looks at the certificate, before letting it fall and break on the floor. He then pretends that it was all just a joke on his part, that he'll have to pass, and he REALLY just wanted to say that he'd turned them down. Batman isn't buying Booster's act and asks him what is really going on, as Booster replies slightly bitterly that he's just living down to expectations, as he and Skeets take off.

So, Booster flies off to join Rip, although he does take time out to save a kid along the way. There is another one of those cool blackboards in Rip's lair, with all the clues written on it, a la "52". Naturally the one that caught my eye was "beware the Red Lanterns". Whaaaaa????

So Booster agrees to help Rip Hunter. On one condition however, with all the time travel, he's going to go and save the best friend he ever had...Blue Beetle!

And finally, as a teaser for the next issue, we leave with a flashback to Sinestro as a Green Lantern on Korugar, and none other than a very (very) young Katma Tui.

The final bonus is a last page that has four teasers for upcoming issues, one with Booster wrestling Braniac over the open jaws of a Tyrannosaurus, Booster back with the old JLI, and a couple of odd members, Booster getting swarmed by the most adorable bunch of evil little worms you ever saw, and finally, Dan Garrett, Ted Kord, Jaime Reyes and Booster, punching out Max Lord! I am in. I am SOOOOO in.

It was fun, it was fast paced, and although there was a lot of exposition, and a lot of plot lines to set up, it was done well and made sense. Booster's motivation is handled beautifully, and there are all kinds of other ideas that are set up at the same time. The art is nice, Booster is pretty as can be, and there are even several very worthy butt shots. If I can't have Green Lanterns this week, this was a worthy substitute. Pick it up and read it, you won't be sorry.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Thank God it's Wednesday

No Green Lantern or Green Lantern Corps this week, which depresses me, but on the other hand, the new Booster Gold book is supposed to come out today! Woohoo! AND Brave and the Bold, and quite possibly a lot of other goodies as well. I'll even pick up the new Flash, because I'm just so glad that Wally is back.

I certainly hope that I don't have to endure the trauma of LAST week's little fiasco. The shipping company had better send ALL the books to my beloved comic book store, or...or...I'll be quite irate, that's what.

I am also depressed that Mike Wieringo has died at the incredibly young age of only 44 of an apparent heart attack. I always rather liked his art, it was fun and cartoony, but had a lot of vibrancy and life to it.

Well...off to the comical book store for my fix.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Still being Lazy

It is an ABSOLUTELY gorgeous day, here in old New England. Low humidity, blue skies, and temperatures in the upper 70's. Much too nice really to be sitting inside and blogging. It must be the late summer doldrums or something, because lately my brain has been on vacation. I have almost nothing to say, and I'm out of outrage or something.\

I did finally stop playing with my action figures...but it was hard. I really need to get the Guardians and the Salakk figure. Of course what they really need to do is come out with Hal's harem. I NEED a Carol Ferris figure (in addition to Star Sapphire), a Cowgirl, an Arisia, a oodika, a Brik, a Katma Tui and a Soranik Natu. Heck, throw in the rest of Hal's old girlfriends while we're at it.

Actually, this is a good idea. We need the entire Green Lantern Corps, past and present in multi-jointed plastic. Who WOULDN'T want a Chaselon or Tomar Re? Apros would be perfect as a stuffed plushie figure. And admit it, Ch'p would be just adorable! I want a Ke'haan, and a Hannu and Laira while I'm at it, and maybe a dead Kreon and Jack T. Chance! The possibilities are almost endless, because there are a crapload of Green Lanterns.

Probably won't happen however, since only die-hard Lantern fans would go for all the more obscure figures. On the other hand, they seem to have immortalized in plastic every single Star Wars character...even ones that were on the screen for no more than ten seconds.

I want G'nort dammit.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Oh what the Heck

Since I am completely being lazy today, I figured what the heck. Here's a couple more. And then I promise that I'll stop. Maybe.

Obviously, Guy has a little bit of the "Captain" in him.
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This is probably self-explanitory.
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Kyle looking startled. Stop it Hal.
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I swear, I swear, I'll stop it now. But I have to admit, that man, this stuff just writes itself! I could do this all DAY!

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Just some good clean FUN!

A slight explanation is due to you. This is all Shelly's fault. She posted some pictures of her new Red Arrow/Roy figure, and I commented on how nice it was. I went on to state that I do terrible things to my OWN action figures, and now she wants pictures.

I also blame my kids. I own, but do not know how to operate a digital camera, and all the downloading and other technical "stuff" that it entails, so the following pictures are NOT completely my fault. I did help pose them however. Also, dollhouse miniatures and Barbie accessories make for GREAT props.

And without further ado...!


The Green Lanterns are having a picnic!


Kilowog as bouncer. Booster wasn't really invited.

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Hal hits his head...again.

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Guy Gardner and his footlong...hotdog. Oh yeah!


The pie-throwing episode.

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Kilowog loses all self-control and gets plowed on Orange soda.

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Hal gets wasted and ends up head-first in a battery.

It all just went downhill from there, but I'll post those another day.

Heh. Playing with dolls is FUN!

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Green Lantern #22...Finally!

Oh Baby! This just keeps getting better and better. Things are really starting to pick up in the latest episode of the Sinestro Corps. The Guardians are starting to panic, Green Lanterns are running around like chickens with their heads cut off, Guy and John are missing, and Hal is face to face with Parallax, aka Kyle Rayner on Qward.

"Running Scared" is the title, and it is an appropriate one. Let me also pause and state that the art of Ivan Reis is utterly magnificent, and Moose's colors just glow. AND there are butt shots. Lots and lots of butt shots. Heaven!

Er...anyway...Kylellax is having just a lovely time taunting Hal. Hal is fixated on trying to find John and Guy in addition to defeating Parallax of course. Geoff Johns even throws in a little tidbit about the color spectrum, having Kylellax state that ..."the green is only the balance in the center of the spectrum. The yellow tips the scales." Remember this kids, I'm sure that it will become important later on.

Hal is pretty much getting his lovely ass handed to him by Kylellax and a host of other members of the Sinestro Corps, including Amon Sur, who just can't wait to get his licks in. Hal is actually in a dilly of a pickle, when who should show up, but the Lost Lanterns, in a fabulous two-page spread. Ke'haan may not like Hal much, but by God, he's still a Lantern, and Lanterns don't abandon their own.

In the middle of all this glorious action, we take a quiet moment to see Superbaby Prime sitting quietly on the moon contemplating Earth. He does have this rather disturbing smirk on his face as he he says..."Heh. Stupid Earth"

Well, crap in a hat.

Then we end up on Warworld, the new Manhunter homeworld which has apparently replaced Biot after Hal and Guy blew it up a while back. Hank Henshaw, the Cyborg Superman is requesting a small boon from the Anti-Monitor. When this whole kerfuffle is over, he wants to be able to die, so that the can be with his wife at last. The Anti-Monitor solemnly promises to kill him, and a tear of gratitude spills onto Henshaw's cheek. This is a lovely moment, full of intrique and pathos...and I don't believe it for a minute. I DO believe that Henshaw wants to die, but I don't believe that the Anti-Monitor is going to put him out of his misery. I guess we'll just have to wait and see.

Meanwhile, Hal and the Lanterns are busy whuppin' on the bad guys. Boodika and Jack T. Chance are still cranky, while Graf Toren, bless his heart is the voice of reason and forgiveness. The Lanterns have been sent to bring back Ion, and it is at this point that they begin to realize that Kyle and Ion are separate entities, because obviously Kyle is right in front of them, while Laira detects Ion 1,000 feet beneath them. Needless to say, this confuses everyone just a bit, which gives Kylellax his chance to really go to town.

Just as he did with Kyle and Hal, he starts hammering at the Lost Lanterns, working on their fears, and messing with their heads. It just bounces off of Hannu and he just pisses off Boodika, but for some reason, Chance is having trouble, and begins to listen to Kylellax's sneers and insinuations. Kylellax calls Chance a frightened little boy, the troublemaker, trying to "out-GUY Guy Gardner" It causes just enough doubt in Chance that he sucumbs to the yellow and is murdered by Parallax. Then as his ring starts to fly away, it is caught and crushed by Parallax in a rather disturbing display of power. Boodika is REALLY mad at this point and tries to kill Kyle, but the ring won't let her, and Hal keeps trying to point out that it ISN'T Kyle, it's Parallax doing this. Parallax just laughs and agrees, saying that he can feel Kyle trying to escape and crying about a painting.

I assume that this is the painting that Kyle was talking about in the Sinestro Corp issue, when they were all sitting around talking just before he was kidnapped. If Geoff Johns keeps bringing this point up, I'm sure that it is going to turn into an important plot point later on.

At this point, they all decide to get the hell out of Dodge, and Hannu busts a tunnel in the rock for them to escape. Hal grabs Boodika who is still momentarily without power, while Graf tells her to lighten up so that she can become worthy of the ring again. They end up in the tunnels beneath Qward. Graf reads the hieroglyphs on the walls, which basically just say "Fear Infects" over and over again. They end up splitting up the group, with Hal, Graf Toren and Tomar Tu going after John and Guy, and the rest going after Ion. Tomar Tu has decided to forgive Hal too, which is a nice step forward for him as well.

So the three of them head down the tunnels only to be confronted by some very familiar figures.

Hey, that's John and Guy hanging up there on that nice pillar! And somehow, Hal has managed to find himself another hot babe.

I have to admit that having Green Lantern and Green Lantern Corps every two weeks makes the month-long wait between issues a lot easier to handle, and keeps the level of excitement flowing feverishly. This was pretty much non-stop action the whole way through, and I imagine that things are going to be just as hectic over in Green Lantern Corps when Kilowog and Mogo go up against Ranx and company. Just top-notch story telling by Johns,and superb art by Reis.

Friday, August 10, 2007

Absolutely Filler

So...while I'm waiting for my copy of Green Lantern #22 to come in...I'm going to waste my time and yours on a charming little piece of irrelevancy. Namely, Justice League America, #36. That's the one that takes place right after the Kooey Kooey Kooey fiasco, and has none other than G'nort on the cover. It is of course by Giffen and DeMatteis, so it is utterly ridiculous...but sometimes utterly ridiculous is what you need.

Basically, poor ol' G'nort is bored. He took J'onn J'onnz's advice to go out and see the world, and now all he wants to do is go back and hang with his old buddies at the Justice League. However, he is actually being stalked by his most dangerous enemy...none other than the infamous Scarlet Skier! To be honest, the Scarlet Skier is not really very infamous, and he is probably the only enemy that G'nort really HAS, but still...he's better than nothing.

G'nort shows up at the JLA's headquarters, but strangely, everyone seems to be too busy to hang out with him. Even Guy gives him the brushoff. Especially Guy. Booster and Beetle are busy, so is Kilowog, and Fire has to wash her hair. Oberon is even ruder than Guy, and that's saying something. Basically they all tell G'nort to take a hike. So he does. He's floating above the city feeling rather sorry for himself, when he sees the brilliant red streak of light in the sky that heralds the arrival of...THE SCARLET SKIER!

There is an explosion, so like a good Green Lantern, G'nort rushes off to investigate. The explosion turns out to be the skier crash landing in the park.

"I fell, a meteor from space...to land up this insane WORLD! Oh! What fate has CAST me here...upon these strange and hostile shores? What...oh. Forget the melodrama! I think I hurt myself!"

I'll bet that Frank Miller wishes he could come up with dialogue like THAT!

Naturally G'nort shows up, and the epic struggle is on! G'nort just won't shut up, his style of witty banter rivals Spider-Man. This just pissess the Scarlet Skier off even more, but it IS fun. However, their titanic tussle has attracted some attention, and Mr. Miracle receives a phone call from the Police Commissioner. Reluctantly...VERY reluctantly, Mr. Miracle and Fire show up to save G'nort from himself. They aren't quite buying the whole Scarlet Skier idea as G'nort tries to explain it all to them, since his arch enemy has managed to give G'nort the slip just before they show up. Mr. Miracle even makes mock of the ridiculousness of the Scarlet Skier as an enemy. G'nort does have the snarkiness to point out that "Granny Goodness" is a pretty silly name as well, which shuts up Scott for the moment.

Scarlet Skier in the meantime is simply looking for a way off of Earth. It turns out that he too has attended the Manga Khan school of Melodrama, which goes a long way towards explaining his more elaborate method of explaining himself.

Meanwhile...back at JLA headquarters, G'nort is explaining the Scarlet Skier to the rest of a very skeptical bunch of heroes. It turns out that the Scarlet Skier is actually the messenger of another, he travels the cosmos and when he finds a suitable planet, he sends the call to...MISTER NEBULA! Planetary Designer!! Mr. Nebula, then comes in and makes the planet...FABULOUS! The rest of the leaguers don't want Earth to become any more fabulous than it already is, so they send Miracle and Fire out to find the Skier along with G'nort.

The Skier in the meantime, has been grounded because his skis were damaged when he crash-landed, so he's going to throw himself off of the Empire State Building in shame. G'nort catches him,and the two eventually come to an understanding. They will fix his skis, and let him "defeat" G'nort in order to get his manhood back, and then they'll be square.

Sounds like a good deal, right? Of course G'nort messes up and blows up the Skie's power unit, so he's stuck. G'nort offers him the job of sidekick, and ends up with a punch, and that's how it ends.

It's pretty silly. BUT...it has cosmic fabulousness, punches, snark, Booster and Beetle, and the back of Guy's head, so it wasn't a complete loss. And G'nort of course.

Thursday, August 09, 2007


So...I go merrily tripping off to my beloved comic book store...pick up my stash, and stare hungrily at the racks...and notice that Green Lantern #22 is somehow missing. How can this be? I checked the lists beforehand, it is SUPPOSED to be out today. A faint sheen of perspiration bedews my forehead, but I remain calm.

I ask Matt where Green Lantern is, and apparently, the Powers That Be, made a mistake, and SHORTED his ENTIRE order of Green Lanterns. My lower lip begins to quiver. I even stamp my dainty foot and whine "But I want it now!" in my best Two-Year old fashion. Matt pats me on the back and calls the company that ships the books. The admit their error, and promise to send an emergency shipment that will presumably arrive this Friday.

I have to wait for two more days! Like the cavemen in the Geico commercials, I am having an existential meltdown. Geoff Johns! Ivan Reis! Moose!! Hal, John and Guy!!!! AAAUUGHHH!

I get the remainder of my books and drive sullenly home. They're good of course, but it just isn't the same. However, if you get Fables and Jack of the Tales, be sure to read Fables first. Much funnier that way.

Can't type. Still pouting.

Guy pictures

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

It's Wednesday!

It is Wednesday, sacred Wednesday. I'm off to the bank, the drugstore and of course my beloved Comic book shop. Green Lantern is out today! Calloo, callay!

I had a really interesting and intellectual blog planned for today, complete with pie charts. Screw it, I didn't really, I just wanna go and read my books. However, so as not to be a complete waste of your time, I give you:

Hal Pictures

Take THAT Hal!


Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Butlers are Cool

Oh yes they are. I wish that I had one. Jeeves is of course the premier Butler of fiction, and thanks to Bully, I can hear about him during Wodehouse Week, which is always fun. I am also fond of Bunter from the Dorothy Sayers books.

In comics however, there is Alfred and Jarvis. Try as I may...and I admit that I haven't tried very hard...they seem to be the only ones around. Alfred of course, is Bruce Waynes general factotum, Butler, friend and Father Figure. He apparently makes honey tea to die for, and spends a lot of time bringing dinner trays down to the batcave to be ignored. He also has brains and a gift for being sarcastically witty. Frankly, I love Alfred to death.

Jarvis has a much bigger audience, he is the Butler for the Avengers, and looking after THAT bunch would drive anyone to drink. He was also carrying on a rather interesting flirtation with none other than Spider-Man's Aunt May for a while there. What happened to that development anyway? I gave up after Civil War.

As annoying as Batman's little tics may be, I think that Alfred may actually have the (slightly) easier job here. He only has one or two spoiled brats to look after, while Jarvis has to coddle the whole bunch of them. Shining Iron Man's suits of armor alone would take an entire day. I do hope they hire additional help for the mundane chores, because as I've said before, expecting a couple of middle-aged to slightly elderly men run around and do all the cooking and cleaning and laundry is a bit much to ask.

THIS however caught my eye, and I've decided that Jarvis is just swell!

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He knows where to put the oyster forks! I'm in love.

The oyster forks of course to to the right, next to or even nestled in the bowl of the soup spoon. Then you just work from the outside in, with each course. The oysters and soup courses will be followed by the fish course, with the corresponding fish fork and knife, the fish fork is the farthest to the LEFT, with the fish knife to the left of the soup spoon. Then the meat course, with the meath fork and knife the next ones in, and then salad.

I know that they bring the salad first in restaurants, but this is actually incorrect. It's just so that they have time to make your dinner. Then you can either place the dessert fork and spoon above the plate, or simply bring it in with the dessert itself, along with a finger bowl and doily.

Finally, just line the glasses up along with the silverware for the appropriate course, and you're in! Sherry with soup, white wine with fish, red wine with meat, and champagne in the flute, and a large water goblet, so you don't pass out from all the booze.

I love that Jarvis's first instinct is to save the china! Seriously, the amount of breakage must be HORRENDOUS! I also love that he actually has a couple of footmen to help out. That looks like it would be a worthwhile dinner party.

You don't see the X-Men going to this amount of effort. No wonder the world hates and fears them.

Monday, August 06, 2007

What Snapper Carr has REALLY been up to

If you have read this blog for any length of time, you will remember that I really don't like Snapper Carr very much. Oh, Kalinara did her best to convince me that he was really the bee's knees, but I wasn't falling for it. Nevertheless, I wasn't convinced that there was any reason for him to be lurking and skulking around the fringes of superherodom. However, I do believe that I have just had an epiphany of sorts.

In the issue of the latest incarnation of the JLA, there is that nice fold-out double page spread of all the new members having their photograph taken. Taken, by none other than Snapper himself. And that's when it hit me. Snapper has been taking photographs for years! Like Jimmy Olsen, he's been slithering around armed with an instamatic or Polaroid, SNAPPING pictures right and left. Of course nowadays, I'm sure that he's graduated to something a little more upscale and full of up-to-date technology. Yes, I do own a digital camera, but I'm not sure how to use it. That's what teenagers are for.

Snapper has been taking blackmail pictures for years! He probably has a safe deposit box FULL of them. The ones of Hal hitting his head alone would take up several.

Guy pictures

For example, just check out this one of Guy Gardner. Unfortunately, this was during that...unfortunate episode with Dementor, when he turned "Guy" into "Gal". Frankly, it was a hoot from the start to the finish, but I can understand the Guy would pay good money to Snapper Carr over the years in order to keep this particular photograph out of Hal Jordan's grubby paws.

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Or THIS one. Actually, I think that Guy is pretty proud of this one, but I don't imagine that Batman wants this sort of thing to get out of hand, so he's probably slipping ol' Snapper some cash too.


Wow! Superman, Barda AND Mr. Miracle are paying through the nose for this one. Snapper has quite a nice little home industry going here!

I'm sure that I could just keep at this, but I assume you've all got the gist of things. Oh that Snapper! I still find him irritating, but I must say that I'm beginning to admire his guts. Just hope that he has a letter to his lawyer about these pictures...just in case.


Saturday, August 04, 2007

Guilty Pleasure Meme

Kalinara has issued a new challenge...what is YOUR guilty pleasure? C'mon, everybody has one. Or even two. I must admit how grateful I am to Kali for giving me a topic today, because the well of inspiration had run dry. Apparently it is just too hot to think.

But not too hot to indulge in my guilty pleasure. I blush to actually have to come out and admit this...but I LOVE watching Judge Judy on television. There. I've come out and said it. Heck, I even admit to watching "the People's Court". It's just so CHEESY! Some of these people aren't quite in the Jerry Springer category of whacked-out-edness, but occasionally they come close.

Apparently there are an AWFUL lot of really dumb people out there. These women who meet a guy in a bar, and have him move in the next day, and hand him their credit card rank amongst the stupidest. Then the guy always whines and claims that it wasn't a loan...it was a GIFT! Then there are the hostile roommates, the belligerent brides, who's wedding was RUINED because the hem of their wedding gown wasn't perfectly even all the way around. Don't laugh, that was an actual lawsuit! The guys that "borrow" someone's car without asking, and then wreck it, but they don't actually have a license or insurance, and it wasn't their fault, because if they didn't want their car "borrowed" they shouldn't have left the keys out...or something.

I watch this stuff, and cheer when Judge Judy calls them names and humiliates them in public. I guess I'm just wallowing in shadenfreude or something, but it does make me feel better about my own life. I may have my problems, but I'm not as screwed up as some of THESE people.

And there is the pure joy of watching a real jerk get his or her comeuppance. I just love seeing a good comeuppance, don't you?

Oh, my other guilty pleasure is gravy. Oh, and seeing Hal get hit in the head.

What's yours?

Hal Pictures

Friday, August 03, 2007

Another Batman Moment

Ok, I can't even begin to describe the combination of joy and consternation that this picture induces in me. Therefore:


I know that Batman likes to dispense his very special version of Justice, but this is starting to get a little on the weird side. I am not much of a Batman fan, so I don't have a clue as to who this woman is, nor the photographer, who at least seems to getting a real kick out of his work.

What on earth did this poor woman do? Peek under his mask? Try to check out his utility belt more closely? Is she a truant officer, trying to get Robin back in school? A social worker trying to get Robin out of that damp cave? Alfred's mistress? I'm stumped.

Besides, according to the child psychologists, spanking is a bad form of punishment. You are supposed to give her a "time-out" Bats. Otherwise, you'll damage her self-esteem! Of course, considering the type of criminals that Batman fights, I'm not sure that self-esteem is a good thing. The Joker is LOADED with self-esteem. Of course so is Hal Jordan, but that's another whole kettle of fish.

Thursday, August 02, 2007

Murder in the DCU

So yesturday, I finally...FINALLY got my greedy little mits on Secret Origins #7. The one with Golden Age Sandman, and the backstory for Guy Gardner.

Oh that Brian Bolland cover. A nice scary Sandman, Hal and his manly grimace, and Guy's adorable sneer.

Anyhoo, the Guy's story is by Steve Englehart, with the art ablely handled by Ernie Colon. It explains that Guy wasn't always the half-crazed lunatic that we all know and love, but started out as a pretty nice fellow. A gym teacher from Baltimore, who was just as good a choice as Hal, but since Hal was closer, the ring picked him. Hal does find out eventually that there was another candidate for the ring, so he makes a point of going and meeting Guy, and they even like each other. Hal however DOESN'T tell him that he is really Green Lantern.

Guy even makes a cross-country bus trip during one summer with a bunch of kids, and is excited about meeting up with Hal again. Unfortunately, there is an earthquake, the road collapses, and Guy is smacked right in the back by the bus, while trying to rescue one of the kids. Not to worry however, since Hal swoops in and rescues both Guy and the little girl. Guy's hurt pretty bad though, which leads the Guardians to pick John Stewart for Hal's backup.

While recuperating, Guy meets Kari Limbo, who gives him a load of mumbo jumbo, including a hint at future grandeur involving the color green. Guy isn't completely buying this of course, but she assures him that she's not like those OTHER Fortune Tellers! She's the real deal! You can TRUST her! So they start dating. She ends up in St. Louis, and if he's still in Baltimore, it is one heck of a weekend drive, but hey, True Love!

So...he's kissing Kari, and gets that itchy feeling between his shoulder blades, and looks up to see...why it's Green Lantern! Staring at them. Intently. Guy looks a little creeped out by Hal's voyeurism, but heck, he DID save his life a while back. Hal just grabs Guy and tells him that since his ring is apparently on the fritz, he needs Guy to serve as his backup. Of course, he already has John Stewart for that, but hey, John's had some training by now, and Guy is pretty much expendable. He doesn't actually TELL Guy that of course. Instead, he reveals himself to be Hal, and hands Guy a ring, and does everything except kiss him on the lips. I'm not sure if that is in the proper protocol for recruitment or not.

After one day of frolicking with Green Arrow, and surviving his chili, Guy goes to recharge his ring, and ends up as we all know...blowed up! Blowed up GOOD!

Now this is where I'm wondering about Police procedure in the DC Universe. A man has just apparently been violently killed. Do they even call in the cops? Do they EVER call in the cops when another hero or villain or innocent bystander bites the dust? The only police that I've ever actually seen, are the corrupt ones in Gotham City.

Because really, this is a classic murder mystery. And Hal should be the prime suspect. And why is that? Well, after Guy gets blowed into little pieces...or so they think... Hal goes off to break the news to Kari Limbo. She puts on a little show of how upset she is, but that lasts about thirty seconds, and then begs Hal to hold her. Being an upright kind of guy, Hal obliges, and then starts thinking to himself:

'...This is wrong...and yet, neither of us has anyone else now! The LIVING shouldn't have to suffer...and Guy's beyond all pain now!"

Nice rationalization there, Hal! Of course Guy ISN'T dead, but they don't know that. So, if I were a DC detective, Hal has motive and opportunity. I can't help thinking that it would have made for an interesting story, if the police spent the next couple of issues following Hal and Kari around.

Still...all and all it's a pretty good story, and does a nice job of setting up Guy's reasons for wanting to punch Hal in the nose when he's revived. And the art is on the purty side. Guy doesn't look like a freak, which is nice.

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

It's Wednesday!

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I have no real reason for posting this cover, other than the fact that it is adorable, and makes me smile. Well, that and the fact that it is now August, and therefore, the new Booster Gold book will be coming out...eventually. Probably not today. But soon!

What does cheer me up, is the fact that three out of the four people pictured here, were dead. Or at least MOSTLY dead. Now only one of them is. Dead, that is...but hopefully not for too much longer. You see, mad scientists have taken control of Kooey Kooey Kooey, and are keeping Ted and Max imprisoned there for some nefarious reason, but any day now, they'll bust out and return, glowing in triumph. If Guy can have a clone, Ted and Max can have clones. At least that's my theory and I'm sticking to it.

As for Fire and Ice, they had a rather touching reunion recently in Checkmate.

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I got all choked up. *sniff* I just hope that Checkmate doesn't have any plans that involve Ice...she's been through quite enough lately. So has Fire for that matter. Which is why, although I rather like Amanda Waller, I am also hoping that she gets her comeuppance for all the crap she's pulled on poor Bea.

But enough negativity. It is Wednesday after all. The bestest day of the week.

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Can't say it any better than that.