I hate to have to come right out and say it, my dear, but it's over. Finito. The end. Oh sure, we had some laughs over the years...too many for me to even count. You were my first love after all. DC was just too stodgy, too sweet and sunny. You...you were dangerous. You were a teenaged "bad boy" and therefore irresistable. You took your heroes and made them fight. You added giant vats of angst and emotion and soap opera, and I loved it.
I read X-men. Hell, I bought Giant-Sized X-Men off the spinner rack at the Drug store. You remember, back in the old days. And it was great. I liked Thor, and Avengers, and Wolverine and Spider-Man and Conan, and then X-Men started to multiply like dandylions, and I bought every single one of them...even the Liefeld ones, because I was HOOKED, baby!
I'm not even sure that I can pinpoint the exact moment when I realized that somehow the bloom was off of the rose. But somehow it just wasn't as satisfying, and I started to stray. Yes, I cheated. I slithered over to the DC corner of the Comic book store and quietly, surreptitiously, started reading. It started small of course, these sort of affairs always do. But Giffen and DeMatteis's Justice League made me laugh, and it had been a while since you made me laugh. And then I started to realize that heroes can actually like each other and well...BE heroes to the populace. I got tired of being hated and feared by everyone. And after Jean died AGAIN, it started to get old.
"Civil War" pretty much killed it however. I looked at you and realized that I didn't even KNOW you anymore. When did you get so mean? So vindictive and nasty? Not to mention incoherent. I just don't understand you any more. I got the latest issues of Wolverine and Wolverine: Origins...and I couldn't make heads or tails out them. And we've been together for SUCH a long time, and it's so hard to just let you go, but it has to be done.
Oh, I'll hang around a little tiny bit. Nextwave was delicious, and I almost decided it was enough...but it wasn't. The thrill is gone. I'll probably still pick up Ultimate Spider-Man, because it is still fun and witty. I hear that Captain America is supposed to be good. But I'm heading over to the bright and shiny part of the Comic Book aisle. Things like Green Lanterns and the Sinestro Corps, "52", Booster Gold, the Justice Society, Blue Beetle, "I Can't Believe It's Not The Justice League", Birds of Prey, Flash, Checkmate, old JLI issues...It's just so much more appealing. Yeah, there is death and destruction and violence and rape and brutish thuggery in the DC universe as well as yours...a little TOO much for my liking, but at least there is also a little bit of hope and humor as well.
So...it's over. I know you'll survive without me, you have all those people who like the "Heroes for Hire" cover afterall. But please pardon me if I don't want to hang around and watch you kill off Mary Jane, so that Joe Quesdada can write about Spider-Man downloading porn and having casual sex. If that is to my taste, I can go read Nightwing insead.