Hal Pictures Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!: A Thank You would be Niced

Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!

Now with Guy Gardner's Seal of Approval!

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

A Thank You would be Niced

Eep! It's Wednesday already, and I have to clean the house for the Fife and Drum practice and picnic tomorrow! I don't know about the rest of the country, but in New England, we simply adore getting dressed up in Revolutionary War outfits, and marching in parades, banging on our drums and tootling on our fifes. All of this of course, is merely the means to an end...which is the BEER GARDEN! Mostly they march in Volunteer Firemen parades, which usually have a carnivale and BEER GARDEN as a way to raise money for the Fire Department.

Which leads me in a roundabout way, to the point of my premise for today. When Superman or Batman or the Justice League or whomever saves the world, or Metropolis, or Star City, or Wilkes Barre...do the grateful citizens ever throw them a nice parade?

Parades are fun. Why my town has them at the drop of a hat. Heck we have a parade just to celebrate opening day for Little League! We have one at Christmas in the snow, with all the fire Trucks decorated with Christmas lights. We freeze our collective asses off and then go and drink hot chocolate.

But a SUPER parade could be a heck of a lot of fun. Green Lantern could make floats and stuff with his ring, or Batman could whip up various incarnations of the Batmobile and decorate them with black and yellow balloons. Superman could make popcorn with his heat vision. The souviner sales ALONE would keep the Justice Hall open for another few months. If it were in Star City, Green Arrow could give himself the key to the city. They could throw tickertape from the Daily Planet.

I want to see Wonder Woman sitting in a gaudy 1950's red convertible with tail fins and white leather upholstery, waving serenely at the crowds. Of course every tinpot, half-assed villain would use this opportunity to attack, and then the heroes could round them all up with a minimum of effort and deposit them in jail at the conclusion.


Just simple thankyou for saving the world once again.


At 8:10 AM, Blogger SallyP said...

Once again, I have noticed that I can't spell. Or actually, I spell beautifully, but my keyboard can't. Please ignore that "D" at the end of Nice in the title.

Perhaps there is something to this "proofreading" idea after all?

At 8:16 AM, Blogger Sea_of_Green said...

Don't feel bad, Sally. Even editors can't edit their own stuff. :-)

As for parades for super-heroes ... Didn't that used to happen quite a bit during the early days of the Silver Age? I seem to recall the Silver Age Justice League, in particular, being the objects of a city parade or two. I know Hal Jordan participiated in a Coast City parade in a very early Silver Age story. I guess these days the heroes wouldn't do it due to "crowd endangerment" concerns or the fear that it would look less than humble.

At 8:19 AM, Blogger ticknart said...

A parade in Star City would be dangerous. All those people buying little bows and shooting little arrows, someone is bound to lose an eye.

At 9:09 AM, Blogger SallyP said...

Here, they throw candy to the kids who are watching. And wouldn't you know it, there was a letter to the editor of our local paper, complaining, that some kid could choke on the candy.

(mutters to herself incoherently)

They COULD throw little Green Lantern Rings. I know I'd want one.

At 6:21 PM, Blogger Derek said...

Little plastic Green Lantern rings would be fun. They'd be cheap, like those little spider or skull rings that show up every Halloween.

And I'm given to understand that Cities Keystone and Central regularly have parades for the Flash. In fact, I just read a trade in which they said that they're up to fourteen Flash Days a year. That's a whole lot of confetti and paper mache...

At 7:52 AM, Blogger SallyP said...

I guess all those Flash parades are their substitute for Mardi Gras.

I know that Metropolis has a "Superman" day, but I don't know if there is a parade for it. I DO know that Booster Gold was jealous, because he didn't have a day in his honor. Poor Booster.

Sea, I can certainly understand why Hal would want to have a parade...unregenerate glory hound that he is. Of course Guy is just as bad.

At 8:39 AM, Blogger googum said...

Superman used to get all kinds of parades and appreciation and probably homemade cookies and hotel keys, back in the day. Remember the old Super-Friends episode, where the Legion of Doom stops Kal-El's rocket from reaching earth, and Superman Day retroactively turns to Hawkman Day. The happiest Hawkman would ever be, gone...

But, I suppose your parades would be put on hold the first time some jerkwad with a giant robot comes tearing up the place.


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