Let's Glorify Guy some More

So by now, we all know that originally, Guy was created as Hal's alternate, and then during his coma, placed upon a shelf for a few years, although Hal showed up every so often to say hello. It wasn't until the original Crisis on Infinite Earths storyline came around, that Steve Englehart decided to bring Guy out of his coma, completely change his personality by playing off of his original brain damage and use Guy as practically a villain that he really became...interesting.

So...so very very interesting.



For one thing, that is one outstanding superhero outfit. It's not typical for one thing, no underwear on the outside, no cape. It's not even that typical of the standard Green Lantern costume, which he did wear, albeit briefly. It's more like a uniform than anything else, with the military-style stripe down the pant legs, the boots that are REAL boots, and the jacket with the collar. Frankly I love it, it is distinctive and unique, while still being immediately recognizable as a Green Lantern and it suits him to a T.



Secondly, there is that attitude. No one can smirk quite like Guy Gardner, nor defeat AND totally humiliate his opponent at the same time. He may be rude, he may be crude, obnoxious, loud, intemperate, lewd and brain-damaged, but by God, he's efficient...at least when it comes to hitting or blowing things up. I admire efficiency




Thirdly, Guy is completely and totally unafraid. Of anything. To the point of lunacy.



And he can certainly take a punch.

Frankly, I think that Batman got lucky here. Guy had taken OFF his ring, and although an athlete, Guy certainly wasn't at Batman's level as a fighter. Plus there was that whole childish/brain-damaged thing going on there. At this point Guy just didn't have a whole lot of experience either. Which is why Bats was smart to take him out quickly.



He's also...funny.

Think about it. Booster and Beetle are funny too, but it wouldn't have been NEARLY as amusing in the old JLI without Guy. Let's face it, Guy wasn't afraid to take a pratfall, and while he was often the butt of the joke, he occasionally managed to perpetrate any number of them on his own. Guy was funny as an out-of-control Manchild, as a sweet and prim, bonked-on-the head character, as a yellow-ringed lunatic, as Warrior, and as he is today, he always has the best lines in the dialogue.

And finally...



Guy is HOT!

In an unconventional sort of way, but that just adds to his appeal, in my book. Sure, Hal and Kyle are pretty, Alan is distinguished, and John is handsome. Guy is...quirky. He's got big ears, and he used to have that ridiculous haircut, and his nose isn't classical, and he's got a long jawline and a big chin, but he does have purty purty eyes, and dammit, he's distinctive! There are plenty of other red-headed characters out there, but you never mistake Wally or Roy or Ralph for Guy.

He's Guy Gardner, and he's proud of it.

It's a Whole New Week!

Now that we are finished with Bashing Batman, and I've already done Whacking Hal, I think that the time has finally come...for Let's Glorify Guy Week! I feel that it is time...nay, HIGH time to let people know just how fabulous my favorite crazy Lantern really is.

He set the tone really, by his very first cover.



I've said it before, and undoubtedly, I'll say it again. That's one HECK of a cover!



Here we have our hero at a very young age, proudly portraying his signature haircut, in honor of his comic book hero's sidekick, "Ernie, the Battling Boy". Frankly, I find this youthful appearance to be simply adorable. Unlike so many superheroes, Guy actually HAS a family consisting of both parents and an older brother. Unfortunately for Guy, his family is a real piece of work.

Despite the obstacles raised by a violent alcoholic father, an indifferent and whining mother, and a bully for an older brother, after a brief flirtation with juvenile delinquency, Guy does manage to pull himself together, get into college, and actually do quiet well, both as a football star, and graduating with TWO degrees.
However, he's still at loose ends.



Here is Guy at the Rose Bowl,where his alma Mater, the University of Michegan is going to play. He manages to run into a time-jumping Booster Gold, and due to Booster's meddling, misses meeting Sinestro, AND becoming Abin Sur's sucessor instead of Hal. But it's really all for the best.



His life is fairly uneventful until he meets Hal Jordan. Up until now, he's been an unassuming Grade School Gym Teacher. But he was actually Abin Sur's other choice as a sucessor, only Hal happened to be closer. Hal decides to check out his rival, and the rest, as they say, is history.

Believe it or not, they are actually friends, and Guy is quite happy to go and visit Hal, while on a bus trip with some of this kids. But, as will become the normal course of events for Guy from this point on, things Do Not Go Well.



Yeah, there is an earthquake, and while trying to rescue one of his students, Guy gets hit by a bus and falls off a cliff, only to be rescued by none other than the Green Lantern! Then while recovering from his injuries, he meets Kari Limbo, an exotic gypsy fortune-teller, and is quite smitten. I would have LOVED to have found out what Mrs. Gardner's reaction to Kari Limbo was.

And finally,



His first appearance as a Green Lantern! A very very inexperience Lantern, who's been roped in by Hal, because Hal thinks his ring is malfunctioning. Hal zooms back to Oa to check on things, leaving Green Arrow and Black Canary to babysit Guy.



Guy even manages to survive Ollie's chili, which has to be at least the equivalent in pain, as falling off of a cliff. He even manages to save Ollie from being squished by a falling wall! Too bad that when he goes to charge up his ring for the second time, it blows up!

And, at this point, Guy's life goes directly into the crapper. They all think he's dead, although he has actually been blown into the Phantom Zone, and then ends up being tortured by Sinestro as a way to get back at Hal, and presumably pass the time. In the meanwhile, Hal is hitting on his fiance, Kari Limbo, and the two of them are actually in the church about to get married, (which is more than Carol Ferris ever managed) when she swoons and has a vision that he's not actually dead. Hal flies off and rescues him, but there is one small problem.



All that torture by Sinestro put him into a coma for the next three years, which I am sure you will agree, is something of a bummer. But all of this is merely prologue, for with the first Infinite Crises, the Guardians decide to finally wake up their poor rookie Green Lantern, and use him to fight as their champion against the rest of the Guardians, and our own brain-damaged, childish, bratty, malcontent was born.

And comics haven't been the same since.

Reviews!

And here are the books that I would have reviewed, if I hadn't been so busy bashing Batman.

Firstly, Jack of Fables #32, wherein we discover some VERY interesting things about Jack and his history. Very interesting INDEED! All of which is leading up to the Great Fables Crossover.

Did I say interesting?

Then there is Justice League of America #31. More on this in a minute.

Oracle: The Cure, #1 of Three. Well, there were some nice character moments, and the art is decent. The Calculator has become quite the character lately. I have to admit however, that as much as I liked the old Batgirl, I much prefer Barbara as Oracle, where she does a heck of a lot more good than simply leaping around rooftops as just another costumed superhero. I guess we shall have to wait and see.

But I STILL miss Birds of Prey.

Trinity #42 was good as always.

Wonder Woman #30 was FANTASTIC! Diana continues to search for Genocide, who is having an awfully good time torturing poor Etta. Steve Trevor is awesome. Diana is the MOST awesome. She makes pretty short work of tearing down Cheetahs' little conspiracy, and I have to admit that both Phobia and Dr.Faust made me laugh out loud. I continue to love T.O. Morrow. And Zeus is completely off of his rocker, which is pretty much par for the course. I am LOVING this book.

I also picked up the soft-cover of the Tales of the Green Lantern Corps which had a bunch of stories that I don't have, and is quite nice, including the whole bit with Krona and Nekkron, which I am fairly sure will come in handy shortly.

But the JLA was the one that most intrigued me this week. It has Hal in it,which is always nice, and Ollie shows up, and Dinah throws a temper tantrum.



Well...THAT seems a bit peremptory.



Oh...she did NOT just punch out her own husband in a snit? I know that Ollie can be a pain sometimes, but this seems a bit over the top.



You know something Canary? I'm not sure that I like your tone here. For one thing, Ollie isn't even IN the JLA, and Hal is only part-time. So I'm not sure that he NEEDS your permission to do anything. Secondly, surely you know by now, that "forbidding" Hal of all people to do anything is simply waving a red flag in front of a bull. And shoving Ollie around just because you're pissed seems to be an awfully juvenile way of handling your problems. How'd you like it if HE punched YOU out when he was in a bad mood? Hmmmmm?

Hal and Ollie then go on to point out that the current incarnation of the League just really hasn't accomplished all that much,and to Dinah's chagrin, they are absolutey right. So, she runs off to Oracle to cry about it. Then she's on the holodeck...oops, the KITCHEN with Roy, as he cries about being dumped by Kendra. Poor Roy, he has the WORST luck with women. He does manage to make a slightly hilarious sexual double entendre however. Then Wally turns her down too, I am assuming that he and Roy are going to be hanging out with the Titans or something.

Then Diana and Clark are sparring in the Fortress and crying about Bruce, when Canary shows up, and they tell her that they're both too busy to help out too. Man, Canary is dealing with a LOT of rejection here. She's down to the last few members, but she's doing her level best to set their backs up too. Good old John Stewart is being stalwart, when Vixen of all people starts being obnoxious. They even make a few snarky comments about the Detroit League, for Heaven's sake. Finally, Canary can't stand it for another second and announces...dramatically...that she's DISBANDING the JUSTICE LEAGUE!

You would think that I would be upset about this, but you would be wrong. For all of its problems, at least this issue was interesting for a change. The change in art may have something to do with that, I like Shane Davis a whole lot more than Benes.

I think that we should bring back the OLD Justice League. And by that, I mean the REAL Justice League! You know, the one with Guy and Booster and Fire and Ice, and Doctor Light if she wants to hang out, and John Stewart if HE wants to hang out,and get Beetle back from wherever he's lurking, or add Jaime maybe, or bring in Zinda and Huntress from Birds of Prey, or use ANY number of the wonderful wonderful second tier of characters that are out there. Just NOT the "trinity" because they have enough going on.

And Now, The Conclusion of our Bat-Bashing

All good things must come to an end, and that includes mocking our favorite caped flying rodent. You've all come up with some doozies, for which I thank you.

But really, when it comes to a doozy, I think that this one takes the cake.



Whoa!

I'm not exactly sure what it is that Hal is doing there, but Batman certainly seems...invigorated. Perhaps we should just have Superman hand Bat's incinerated corpse from Final Crises over to the Green Lanterns, so that they can work their...er...energy magic upon it. Bats will just sit up, fit as a fiddle and ready for action!

I can't help but wonder what the rest of the Justice League was doing off-panel while this was going on. I'm sure that Ollie was snickering, Barry was worried, and Snapper was hoping desperately that it was his turn next.

Still Bashing Merrily

Seriously, what does one even BEGIN to be able to say about this particular little gem? I know that Bats keeps some pretty esoteric items in his utility belt, but bird-shaped helmets? Why would the need for a bird-shaped helmet even OCCUR to you, in the normal course of events?

I guess it just proves that even Bruce got tired of being dark and angsty all of the time.

Still Bat-Bashing

I think that we can all agree that Batman does seem to be very very good at hitting things. Nobody can punch out a thug, quite like the Batman. However, he's also awfully quick off of the draw when it comes to other forms of chastisement.

I think we all remember the classic "Papa Spank!" picture. Here, he seems to be taking it quite literally.



I've always enjoyed the sheer glee on the photographer's face. I'll bet the Tabloids had a field day with THAT picture.

He also seems to enjoy slapping people. In the immortal words of Bart Simpson, he's just a Slap-Happy Pappy. Here he is, getting to know Catwoman, back when she wore a giant Cat-Head.



Then there was the time with Snapper Carr. To be honest, I can't say that I really blame him for this one. I too, have often longed to slap Snapper Carr.



Then there was always Robin, hanging around.



Somehow I don't imagine he's ever slapped OR spanked Alfred. Or if he did, then Alfred has the pictures in a safe-deposit box somewhere. I'm not even GOING to go into the weird way that Batman seems to enjoy punching OR slapping rhinos, wolves and bears around.

The man needs therapy.

Let's Bash Batman, Day Two

When it comes to mocking Batman, in a sweet yet hilarious manner, there is nobody better than Black Cat, over at "Welcome to Wayne Manor". In this particular episode, Dick and Jason take an interesting look at Bruce's closet.



You know Bats, if you want to infiltrate the Green Lantern Corp, you had better be prepared to hear some pretty colorful language. It's just as Guy always says, Bats and Lanterns don't mix.

It's Let's Bash Batman Week!

Welcome once again, to "Bash Batman Week". Nothing like kicking a man while he's down, is how I look at it! So, in the midst of all the Battling for the Cowl, let us take an affectionate look back, at some of the most memorable "Bat" moments.

For me, that usually means that somehow, he's managed to get hit from behind, or didn't plan ahead, or just something very un"bat"like has happened to him. Because frankly, I enjoy those the most.

Here's a little tidbit from Sergio Aragones.



Heehee!

The Bat at his most rabid.

Please feel free to jump in with YOUR favorite Bat moments. We'll be here all week. Try the veal.

Yeah, I got Nuthin'

It's Saturday, and sunny out, and the crocuses (croci?) are struggling through the dirt, and it's SPRING! Woohoo!

So I have absolutely nothing of importance to say. Except I do have this.



Never, NEVER get between these two, and the last bagel on the Justice League breakfast buffet table.

A Little Bit of History

So, a couple of days ago, I was merrily checking out Adam's daily post over at "Comics Make No Sense", when, what to my wondering eyes should appear, but THIS cover.



Well, to put it mildly, I was hornswoggled. Gobsmacked. Nostalgic, even. You see, this was the Very First Comic Book that I ever bought with my own hard-earned babysitting money.

Back in the 1970's it was, and I was a much much younger and thinner Sallyp. In fact, I wasn't a Sallyp then, but a Sallyf. They didn't even HAVE Comic Book stores yet, you had to go down to the drug store, where hopefully, the books would either be on a spinner rack, or jumbled in with the regular magazines. There was no such thing as back issues. Books cost 25 cents. They were 20 cents, but had recently gone up. They had a letters section in the back of the books, where people who wished to comment on the most recent comical opus actually wrote in, and prayed that their letter would be printed and commented in turn upon, by an editor. An awful lot of current writers wrote fan letters back in the day.

I didn't really care much about the Avengers, but I DID have a burgeoning crush on Thor. I just loved his hair. It didn't hurt that I was on a Norse Mythology kick at the time, and had learned the Runic alphabet, and stuff like that. Hey, I was a teenager! And John Buscema drew such nice looking people. Although even at that tender age, I thought that Wanda was pretty useless.

It was a short two-parter, and a fairly decent story, all things considered. For example, I learned thatHawkeye was able to survive his poisoning, because he had a glass stomache. Exactly HOW he gained such a surprising organ was not explained, and I did wonder how he managed to survive being punched, but it did catch my attention. So, I started collecting Thor, and Avengers, and even X-Men, when it was being written by that Claremont fellow, and drawn by that Cockrum guy. Turns out, they did some pretty good stuff together.

Then I graduated, went to college, got married, had babies, and moved onto other things for a while. Didn't collect comics anymore (but still kept them) until a few years went by and I suddenly realized that they were a lot more visible, and readily accessible than they used to be,and all that pent-up longing and desire for brightly-clad men and women in tights came flowing back. Only this time, it was DC and not Marvel that held my attention. Funny how that works out.

Anyhoo...can you all remember the very first comic book that jumped out at you, and you had to...HAD to buy it right then and there, and hold it in your trembling hands?
Because, I imagine that you always remember your first.

Tiny Reviews for a Tiny Week

Wow! That WAS a tiny week! It has finally dawned on me, that DC cancelling Birds of Prey, Nightwing, Robin and Blue Beetle has put a huge dent in my buying habits. It has also put a large dent in my indebtedness to Matt at my beloved local Comic Book Store. He was positively glum.

Well, it was the final issue of Black Lightning:Year One. It was decent, it was nice to know a bit more about Jefferson, although I think that it ended rather quickly...fight, fight, fight, lightning strikes, and everone ends up in jail, happy,theend.

I did pick up the Outsiders. This was a book that I formerly wouldn't have gone near with a ten foot pole, but now that Peter Tomasi is writing it, I have discovered that it is...GOOD! It also shows what happened to Black Lightning,which makes for a neat ending.

No Alfred in this issue,which is a shame, but there IS Owlman, and I think that Owlman is a great character. (I was going to say that he's a hoot, but I've already used that). Anyway, Geo-Force is running around being forceful, there are some rather interestin immortals, and something surprising happens to Katanna.

Thank goodness Trinity is always there. Not spectacular, but always solid, and decent storytelling. Things are beginning to pick up of course, with the end in sight,and the heroes getting back to normal with the exception of a very special few.

That was IT!

I feel oddly unfulfilled. A...a bit wanting. Maybe I'll just go and read Green Lantern Corps again.

And the Art Chores on Green Lantern...

...will be handled by none other than Doug Mahnke! Woohoo!

I am going to miss Ivan Reis terribly, he is such an elegant artist. But if he has to leave, then I am perfectly happy having Doug Mahnke in his place. Besides, I think that his and Pat Gleason's styles will compliment each other perfectly.



As you can see, Green Lantern is going to be in some pretty good hands. And look, Kyle has his old floppy hair back! I LOVE Kyle's floppy hair. Mr. Mahnke has the advantage of being pretty fast and efficient for a penciler as well, so perhaps some of the delay issues that plagued GL will be a thing of the past. He has a wonderful sense of design, he can layout a page like nobody's business, and he has a bit of a quirkiness that I enjoy.

I'm glad that DC is taking care of Green Lantern for all of us, with two of the best writers and some of the best artists. There is no better combination more pleasing to my heart than a good story AND good art.

Huzzah!

Uhmmmm...!

Oh it's going to be one of THOSE days. The kind where you stare blankly at the screen, without a thought in your head.

I haven't seen Watchmen yet, so I can't really discuss it.

I haven't gotten the Wonder Woman DVD yet,so I can't dscuss it either, although I really really want to.

It's Tuesday, so the new books don't come out until tomorrow.

I've already been over to Pretty Fizzy Paradise, where Kalinara is running the Second Annual Flame War, and it was pretty enjoyable.

Over at the Hoosier Journal of Inanity, Mr. Sea has been preoccupied with important things such as Real Life and therefore hasn't drawn any more of his "Itty" series in a couple of days. Therefore, I am pissy.

So here.



This is a very nice picture of Kyle and Alan. I get so wrapped up with Guy and Hal that I sometimes forget all about the oldest and youngest of the Green Lanterns and that will never do.

Love and Green Lanterns

In between beheadings, raining eyeballs and various other dismemberments and the Red Lanterns, Yellow Lanterns and Blue Lanterns, there has actually been a bit of development in the romance department for any number of Green Lanterns. And as much as I may enjoy the fighting and stuff, being a woman, I just happen to rather enjoy the mushy stuff too.

First of all, what oh what is going to be happening with Hal, Carol and Cowgirl? Geoff Johns seems to be keen on setting up a classic love triangle, only this time instead of it being Hal, Carol and Green Lantern, it's Hal and two girls. I can only imagine that Hal is much relieved NOT to be in competition with himself this time. And that a part of him greatly enjoys the possibility of being fought over by two gorgeous women.

It's a bit tougher on Carol and Cowgirl of course, although I'd have to say that Carol has it the worst. It's hard to say exactly how Cowgirl feels, there just hasn't been enough of a history between her and Hal, as there has been with Carol and Hal. While I don't dislike Gillian, I am fairly indifferent to her, because I've always rather liked Carol. Cowgirl seems like a poor man's version of Lady Blackhawk, and why settle for that? Or, at most, a pale reflection of Hal himself.

It's going to be interesting to see how Hal reacts to Carol being back in the Star Sapphires again. And NOT as their Queen. Will there be friction between her and Queen Aga'po? Was Aga'po ALWAYS in charge, and they just LET Carol think she was Queen? Is she going to be cute and spunky like Miri, or nutso like Fatality?

Hal at least is familiar with this sort of thing going on in his love life. The situation between Kyle and Soranik is a little more delicate. For one thing, there is the new rule of the Guardians, which they are both conciously sneaking around. On the other hand, Kyle IS both Honor Guard and the Torchbearer, so maybe they'll cut him some slack. I wouldn't count on it, though.

Secondly, there is the whole "Kiss of Death" thing to deal with. Kyle has to feel just a little bit nervous. I can also see him being just so darned happy to finally HAVE someone to love, that he gets careless. I'm pretty sure that he is Soranik's first serious love interest, she has always struck me as being too consumed by her career to have ever had time for flings, casual, or otherwise. They may think that they can hide their feelings from the Guardians, and perhaps they can, since the Guardians really aren't too bright, but it's going to be another story when it comes to concealing their affair from Guy, Kilowog or Salaak.

But I suppose the burning question I have, is can the two of them make it together? Are they actually suited, or is it just hormones? I've always gotten the impression with Kyle, that he loves BEING in love, and that he seems to gravitate towards strong characters. Alex definitely wore the pants in their relationship, and Donna and Jade were both pretty forceful as well. Soranik certainly is no pushover, she rather reminds me of Alex in a way. She certainly the smarter of the two of them.

As for Soranik, I can see her haveing a nurturing side, which would come in handy, when dealing with Kyle. She IS a Doctor after all. Besides, she's probably completely mesmerized by Kyle's amazing hind quarters like the rest of us.

Then we have the strange case of Guy and Ice. Two steps forward, one step back. I'm getting the impression that as much as they want to be together, they are still both having ambivalent feelings. Guy has been pining for Tora for years, and yet practically the minute that she shows up safe and sound, he takes fright and hi-tails it to Oa. As for Tora, when she meets up with Guy for the first time, and he pours out his heart to her, her first reaction is to step back and request some "time". They seem to be engaged in a very deliberate and delicate dance at the moment. Kyle for one, is completely bemused by their behavior. I'd love to know how Kilowog feels. I was rather hoping for a reunion between Tora and Kilowog as well, since they WERE teammates on the old JLI. Oh well.

And finally, we come to John, and his longing still for Katma, his dead wife. It isn't too surprising that he still has the unexpressed hope that she can return to him from death, Tora just managed to pull off that little feat after all. It's going to be pretty tough on poor John, if all he gets is her rotting zombified corpse in Blackest Night.

So...it's all pretty interesting, wouldn't you say? I'll be waiting breathlessly for the resolution of all the romantic plot twists in addition to the War of Light and Blackest Night. It's going to be one heck of a summer.

Just a Quick Note

Not too much to talk about today. I am busy watching the St. Patrick's Day parade, going on in Hartford, Connecticut, because my Husband, son and two daughters are marching in their Fife & Drum Corps for the first time in this particular parade! It's only about 40 degrees out, so they are wearing lots and lots of layers.

It's being televised, which is nice, but they have the male News Anchor all dolled up in a kilt, which is nice, but he called his sporran a tartan, which is idiotic.

In comical news, apparently, DC is going to be adding some additional stories to the backs of regular books,mainly a Blue Beetle short story, added onto Booster Gold's book in a short while. Woohoo! More Jaime! They are also adding a Ravager short to Teen Titans,and Metal Men to the back of Doom Patrol. The Metal Men feature will be by Giffen and DeMatteis, and drawn by Maguire, so I am SO buying that. The price will be up to $3.99, but unlike Marvel, you are getting more content, so I guess we can't complain TOO much.

Still trying to watch the parade. It would be nice if they actually SHOWED the MARCHERS instead of interviewing shamrock-bedecked and drunken parade watchers, but hey, that's just me.

Green Lantern Corps #34

Well boy howdy, was this one a doozy!



That's Mongul fighting with Arkillo of course, and I swear to God, it looks as though Arkillo is jamming his finger into Mongul's empty eye socket. Ouch! That's ok though, the actual fight is even more visceral.

Firstly though, we have a nice scene with Sodam Yat, Arisia and Sodam's Mother. Whom he is NOT particularly delighted to see, rather to Arisia's surprise. You thought that Guy had a bit of a problem with HIS parents? That's nothing compared to the way the Sodam feels about HIS! Since Mongul has invaded and rather easily conquered the planet of Daxam, Mrs. Yat came running to Oa for some help. This doesn't sit particularly well with Sodam,since everyone on the planet of Daxam is a miserable bigoted xenophobe, and he figures they pretty much got what they deserved.

At first I was a bit startled by the depth of Sodam's bitterness, but the more that he explains it, the more you begin to realize that his parents really ARE a pair of jerks, and I began to lose my sympathy for old mum when she decides to slug him. Actually, the one that I'm feeling sorry for, is Arisia. It's never comfortable being the odd person out,when other people start airing their dirty laundry right in front of you. Then of course, I remembered that she used to hang out with Hal, so she's probably used to this sort of thing.

With a GREAT deal of reluctance, Sodam Yat decides that he'd better mosey on over to Daxam and see what he can do, sending him dear old mum off to Oa, in a protective bubble. I can't wait to see how she reacts when she arrives.

But, anyway, back to the Mongul/Arikillo dust-up. There's not a lot of dialogue other than some grunting and growling, but boy, it's sure intense. The two of them manage to perpetrate an enormous amount of damage, both on each other and the surroundings. When the dust finally settles...literally, it seems as though Arkillo is the victor, and the various Sinestro Corp members begin to cheer...except that appearances can be deceiving, as Arkillo keels over, and Mongul rises from dust...and rips out his tongue.

Urrk!

That Mongul. Such a showoff.

We then switch to a much more pleasing image, that of a bare-chested Kyle and underwear-clad Soranik. They...they've been DOING IT,and Soranik is still breathing! Woohoo! So they talk and smooch for a bit, but Soranik has to get back to Korugar and try to explain just what happened with Sinestro. Won't THAT be fun?

We then have a brief vision of a particular planet in Sector 3599, which is Kryb's...er...crib, and the horrifying sight of all the children she's snatched. This probably won't end well. We also stop in for a moment of Zamaron, where the Queen is also eavesdropping on Kryb's abandoned children, and Kryb's reaction. Apparently she's pleased with Kryb's conversion to love.

But where is Guy, you may ask? Why he's over at the Sciencells, dropping off a new prisoner, none other than Vice, from the Red Lanterns. It takes Guy, Kilowog, Salaak AND Voz together to get him into his specially adapted cell. Kilowog then spends some time bringing the rest of them up to speed on what happened with Sinestro's botched execution, and the existance of the Red Lanterns and the Blue Lanterns.

Guy is a bit bemused by all the new corps showing up, and naturally has some of the best dialogue. Guy ALWAYS has the best dialogue.

"...Ya gotta be kidding me...green, yellow, red, blue, violet...it's like Walt Disney threw up. What the hell's going on out there?"

Kilowog agrees with him completely.

They are all about to go upstairs, have a cold one, and discuss all the rather surprising ramifications, when Scar the evil Guardian decides that now is the perfect time to start meddling.

And boy, does she know how to meddle!

The art is firstrate as usual, the dialogue flows along, and there is a whole lot going on here, without seeming too frenetic. But it is fastpaced, and leaves you on the edge of your seat and wanting more.

New Books!

Gosh, that was a tiny tiny week. But still, some of my favorites, so I am quite happy.

I picked up Batman Confidential completely on a whim, and I'm glad that I did, since it has King Tut and the Riddler in it. The only problem is that now I have to go back and find the previous issues of this storyline,because it is that much fun. I do love the Riddler. Here he's teaming up with Batman, and doing so in a quite competent manner. I adore how he's outraged that Tut is stealing his schtick.

Booster Gold continues to delight me. We get to the finale of the latest story, with the various mystical daggers and stuff. Good choice for a villain! It made perfect sense, and I didn't figure it out for quite a while. Michelle gets a bit of a shock, it will be interesting to see how she deals with it. Lots of stuff concerning the Scarab,and how and why certain things must be done to insure that Dan and Ted AND Max end up coming to be.

Poor Booster. He must really get headaches from all of this time jumping sometimes.

Fables continues with the aftermath of Boy Blue's death, and the belief on the parts of a number of characters that it's only a matter of time before he comes back. There is a great deal of discussion about whether or not Fables are immortal and HOW they are, and other interesting theological notions, all of which seem to be aimed at setting up the forthcoming crossover with Jack of Fables and The Literals. I must admit that I am rather looking forward to the dust-up between Bigby and the Beast.

Green Lantern Corps. Oh yeah, baby!

Green Arrow/Black Canary was ok. I'm still not feeling completely invested in this,and Ollie behaves in a rather dickish manner for quite a while. On the other hand, the Arrow Signal was a hoot.

Trinity continues to be interesting. Into the home stretch now! I did rather enjoy the way that the other heroes were indignant at the Big Three's lofty unconcern.

Even though I have all of these issues,I've been collecting the beautiful Justice League International collections as they come out. The fourth volumn just came out this week, and as usual, it is delightful. It is so handy to have all the stories all together instead of having to go rooting through my boxes. This collection includes the aftermath of the Khund invasion, the formation of the European League, the ones where Beetle went bonkers and tried to stab Max,and Guy and Ice's first date, with the funniest portrayal of Black Hand that I have ever read. I wonder if Geoff Johns is going to use THAT characterization when it comes to Blackest Night?

And I almost forgot to add, that I finally found the latest action figure of Ice! She's gorgeous, so I immediately brought her home and put her on the shelf with my bowl-headed figure of Guy and left them to it. These latest JLI figures really are very nice. I'm going to try and get the G'Nort figure next week! They are also going to be bringing out Fire, Booster and a new Beetle. I don't know if they are doing Guy, but it would be nice. There are only two Guy figures,and they both have the same body. I want a new one! Heck, I think that Abin Sur has more figures than Guy!

Superheroes get into the Strangest Predicaments

There is no denying that your average Superhero finds himself or herself in some strange and bizarre situations upon occasion. It comes with the job I suppose,and when you have supervillains running about with all kinds of peculiar costumes, gadgets and weaponry, you have to accept the fact that odd things are going to happen. Throw aliens into the mix, and it gets even stranger.

But this is definitely out of the ordinary.





As a Civil War History buff, I've seen a lot of cannon, and I really don't think that I've ever seen one that would allow for this particular pose. Unless they've sawn off the barrel, which I would think would render the cannon unuseable, or else HIGHLY volatile. If the two gentlemen manning the gun were so stupid as to actually try to fire it, they would find themselves, along with Batman, BLOWED UP! Blowed up GOOD!

Besides, this really seems more like the sort of situation that Wonder Woman would find herself in, as opposed to Batman.

Then there is Scalphunter jumping down from the tree and brandishing his knife along the way. If he actually wishes to perforate Batman, then this would probably be the way to do it. If he wants to accidentally perforate himself, I would say that the odds are also pretty good. If he wishes to actally perforate the two gunners, why not simply come around from the tree, BEHIND them,and dispatch them quietly and efficiently?

Because it would be a whole lot less spectacular, that's why. Of course if this is simply a reinactment of the Battle of the Little Bighorn, then really, Batman only has himself to blame.

I'm really not even Trying anymore

It's the day before new comics come in, and it's a darned good thing too, because my well of inspiration done dried up.



Fortunately, there are things like this particular cover to mock. It's not quite the same as making fun of Batman, or having things fall on Hal's head, but still...I'll take what I can get.

Seriously, these two are x-ray visioning each other, when Lana is RIGHT THERE?!

Hmmmph. Stupid boys.

Wherein I Discover that I don't even NEED Titles

Whew! That's something of a convoluted title. On the other hand, it is a rainy Monday morning, and I'm not at my best. But let me explain.

Let us gaze upon this scan.



When I first saw this, I had NO idea what book it was from. I saw an attractive, if noisy blonde yelling at a red-haired man. Naturally, given MY mindset, I automatically assumed that the blonde was Black Canary, and that she was yelling at Guy Gardner for some reason. Or even no reason at all, considering their somewhat tumultuous history in the JLI.

What could possibly be going on, I wondered. Was there a story out there concerning the two of them that I had possibly overlooked? Then I broke down and actually read the lines accompanying the scan, and realized that in actuality, it was Emma Frost and Banshee.

Oh.

Well.

Now I'm crushed, because I really really WANTED a story about Dinah and Guy and boxing.

And Speaking of Blackest Night...!

How IS that whole War of Light thing going to play out, anyway? I can't help but think that possibly THIS character will come into play. Somehow.



Oh those whacky Legionaires! If Color-Changing Lad here, can actually do this, then the whole War of Light is gonna get a whole lot more interesting. If this kid is still around and available, of course.

Soothsaying

Being something of a sucker for punishment, I do admit to visiting the various message boards sometimes, to see what people are talking about, mainly in relation to Green Lanterns. While there are occasionally some pretty good topics, there IS a downside, because message boards seem to be where the crazy people hang out. It is hard for me to believe, but there are STILL people out there fighting over whether or not Hal is better than Kyle and vice versa.

But never let it be said, that I can't recognize a good idea when I see one. And someone had the idea of everyone writing down, their individual prognostications for Blackest Night, and then when it was all over and done with, they could go back and see if they were close, or wildly ludicrous. And really, that strikes me as a pretty fun thing to do. That, and I'm a bit desperate for a topic for today.

So...here are my predictions for Blackest Night.

Dead people will come into the story...somehow. I know, this is a pretty risky jump in logic, but bear with me. Geoff Johns is pretty good about occasionally dropping in hints as to future storylines!

The scarred Guardian is Up To No Good. This one is a bit of a stretch, since as we all know, Guardians, in addition to being simply ADORABLE, are always wise, benevolent, trustworthy, and sincerely devoted to the well-being of their Corps. It's not like their plans have ever backfired or anything!

Hal Jordan will appear prominently. Again, a bit of a stretch, but Geoff Johns seems to like him for some reason.

Kyle Rayner, Guy Gardner and John Stewart will also make token appearances.

Sinestro will also probably show up. I know that he's been a bit overused, but what the heck, he's not a bad villain.

Some OTHER villains will probably make an appearance as well. I've heard some wild talk about other "Corps" and something about a "War of Light". Probably nothing to get TOO worked up about though.

ALL of the characters will make it through the story, unscathed. This is comics we're talking about! They wouldn't kill off COMIC book characters! That...that would be just crazy!

At the end of the story, Hal will capture Sinestro, who will twirl his mustache and say..."Curses! Foiled again!" Hal will smile, and turn and "wink" at the audience, before leading Sinestro off in cute little green handcuffs. He will also use a glowing green boxing glove when he fights with Sinestro.

Green Lantern behinds will be prominently displayed throughout the entire crossover.

Well...I think we can be sure of the last prediction! Do any of you have any predictions of your own? Let's get them out there,and then look back in a few months, and see how we've all done. Personally, I think I just NAILED it.

Secret Six #7

Oh Gail Simone, you never fail me. They may have cancelled Blue Beetle, Nightwing, Robin and Birds of Prey, but Secret Six and Wonder Woman are still there...for now.

Yes, Gail and Nicola Scott continue to deliver on this latest issue. The remains of the Six have finally made it to Gotham, and things as they say, are hitting the proverbial fan. As you recall, Floyd Lawton, aka Deadshot, and my FAVORITE member of the Six, had apparently turned traitor and run off with the Neron card, after beating the crap out of his friends. He's high-tailing it to Gotham with the card, Tarantula and poor Bane bleeding to death in the back of the limo.

The rest of the bunch, are shakily pulling themselves together and assessing the damage. All things considered, they are in decent shape considering that if he had REALLY wanted to, Lawton could have killed them all. They aren't really thinking about that yet however, they're all just mad as hell. So Ragdoll politely commandeers a hippie Volkswagen bus, and they're off! Full of piss and vinegar, and beating up the bad guys along the way.

Back in the limo, Lawton seems oddly polite to Tarantula, inviting her to sit up front, taking off her handcuffs, and even enquiring after the wellfare of Bane...still quietly bleeding in the back seat. Tarantula, who is no fool has figured out that Lawton is actually...in his own peculiar fashion...being heroic. He ambushed his friends in order to save their lives, since he's pretty damn sure that whomever shows up with the card is automatically dead. Tarantula of course sees right through his bluff. Awwwww...I KNEW that Floyd wouldn't throw them to the wolves!

It doesn't matter however, since the rest of our merry band are hot on his heels. Not to mention every two-bit thug on the planet and then some. And of course Huntress, Grace and Zinda show up as well. And finally, just to make the day perfect, Scandal is about to be chomped on and Bane decides that...for her...he'll just have to go off the wagon, slugs down some super trooper juice, and starts breaking backs right and left. Woohoo!

Junior is right in the middle of the fray, and the Mad Hatter also shows up, since he's the one who is really mad at our hapless crew. A donnybrook of truly major proportions is underway.



But at least Catman isn't mad at Deadshot anymore. Our heroes are literally up against a wall, with Junior shrieking that they have the card, when from out of nowhere, Tarantula leaps upon Junior's back, yelling that SHE has the card,and since she has figured out that there is no way she's going to survive this, she's going to go out with a bang, takes Junior with her.

Well!

You'd think that would be the end of it, no bad guy, no one to pay them for getting the card, and the card has been destroyed anyway...right? Well, there's still the Mad Hatter, and he's still pretty pissed. But fortunately Ragdoll finds his hat, and wants to make amends, except that he throws it over the side of the bridge, where Tarantula and Junior just fell to their fiery deaths, and politely says "fetch". And he DOES!

That's one tired bunch of semi-villains, I can tell you that. All the various hired thugs and baddies grumble and shuffle off to bind their wounds and fight another day. The Six manage to make up more or less, and also decide that now is a good time to ride off into the sunset. Especially Scandal, who finds a rather pleasant surprise.

It had a happy ending! Sort of. A bit. I do have to admit that I really like this particular bunch, including Bane and Jeanette, and I do hope that they stick around for a while. It was also nice to see Huntress and Zinda, if only briefly. I'm just so happy that this is an on-going series and not just a mini, that I could plotz.

The Importance of Birth Order

This is a rather odd hypothesis, and I'm not even sure that I have formed it fully, but this is the sort of thing that I get idly musing about. Does your own order of birth have any connection with your preferences in favorite characters?

I'm the second oldest in my family. And it occured to me, with something of a slight shock, that a great number of my favorite characters are ALSO the second children.

Hal Jordan for example. He's a middle child, with an older and younger brother, and the older one, was something of a bully.

Guy Gardner is a second child, and we all know how WONDerful Mace Gardner was. Mr. Golden Boy, and also something of a bully.

Jack Knight is a cool character, and lo and behold, his older brother David was occasionally a douchebag and a bully too.

Heck, even Wolverine had a creepy older brother.

There do seem to be a lot of only children out there, Wonder Woman, Superman, Batman, Nightwing, Green Arrow, Black Canary, Flash(Wally anyway), Aquaman, Kyle Rayner, Capt. America, presumably Hawkman, Barbara Gordon, Ted Kord, and probably a ton more.

It's rather nice I think, when superheroes have siblings. Jaime Reyes is actually the oldest, but at least he has Milagro. Booster Gold has Michelle. Even J'onn J'onnz had an evil brother.

And then there's the orphans. Man oh man, are there a lot of orphans. I think that it may be easier to name the superheroes that HAD a two-parent household growing up than the number of orphans, or at least single or widowed parents.

Jaime Reyes heads that list, he has some of the most awesome parents around. Also high on that list are Jonathan and Martha Kent. Bats may be an orphan, but at least he had good and loving parents for a little while. Guy had two parents, although I'm doubtful about the good and loving part. Still...they were at least there. Hal had two for a while, and as much as his mother can annoy me, she did her best to raise three boys on her own.

There were a number of fathers that deserted the families, such as Booster's and Kyle's. I can't think of too many where the mother deserted, although there are a bunch where the mom died. So, I suppose, in a way, that superhero families are pretty much like the rest of the general population's, not at ALL typical. I've rather lost the gist of my original thought however. Do any of you find that you are skewed towards liking a particular character in relation to your own birth order? Do orphans drift towards Batman and Robin? Adopted aliens just naturally like Superman? Single offspring like Tim Drake?

Or am I just blowing smoke?

Oh Hal...Never Change

Enough of reviews and solemn social commentary! Time to get back to my bread and butter...which consists of mocking Hal Jordan. You have to give it to Hal...sometimes he just makes it SO easy.




Remember back before the original Crisis, when Hal was busy merrily burning his bridges both with the Guardians and his friends? He wanted to be with Carol, who had given him the usual ultimatum, and since he was fresh from being out in exile in space with poor Dorine, he was hornier than usual, and acceeded to Carol's demands. Of course the minute that he gave up his ring, he began to regret it, but that's just Hal. What he doesn't have, is what he wants the most.

Then to replace him, the Guardians appointed John Stewart, and then during the Crisis, the renegade Guardians brought back Guy Gardner. Hal was simply beside himself. But not to worry, because now he has his ring back, and everything is simply FABULOUS!!!

Well, a couple of his friends died, not to mention the Universe, but Hey! Hal's got his ring! Let's turn those frowns upside-down!

And he never ever tried to quit again, having learned his lesson.

I Turn My Back for ONE Minute!

This is probably all my fault, but apparently Live Journal's Scans_Daily site has been taken down, in something of a panic by the Live Journal people. And by "my fault", I WAS pretty pissy about them a short while back, when a number of people who congregate there were being violent about Beau Smith. I mean...how can you not like Beau Smith? That's just crazy talk!

Anyhoo...I've been doing quite a bit of reading amongst the various sites and blogs all discussing Scans_Daily's downfall, and I have to admit that I find myself somewhat torn.

It may...no it IS naive on my part to have visited the site, prowling for old Green Lantern scans, without concerning myself about the legality or at least ethics of what I was doing, and they were doing. It just never occurred to me. But the fact that some creators are fine with having their work put up for free, doesn't mean that all creators are fine with it, and so they really should leave Peter David alone. He didn't do anything wrong, and getting death threats is a bit extreme.

Kalinara of course, has a very well-reasoned take on things. That makes sense, Kalinara is going to Law School, and she knows whereof what she speaks. Kevin Church over at BeaucoupKevin is a bit more cranky, but he also raises some interesting points. Johanna Draper Carlson at Comics Worth Reading weighs in, but Lisa Fortuner over at http://robot6.comicbookresources.com/2009/03/just-past-the-horizon-the-male-space-is-just-better-hidden/#more4944 has an excellent take on all of this.

I just find myself wobbling in the middle. On the one hand, I can certainly understand that the site was a form of piracy lite, as Lisa calls it. They were supposed to only show a few pictures, but some people always pushed the rules, and managed to get away with it. On the other hand, I have to admit that there were a lot of books that I first spotted on Scans_Daily that I had never read, and found myself intrigued into picking up...Blue Beetle being among them. I also have to admit that I've loved those old Suicide Squad entries.

On the other hand, some of...not all of certainly...the people commenting were a little on the whacky side. As in completely NUTS! Some of these people would argue with the actual writers about how they should portray their own characters! That is taking fan entitlement just a tad too far, in my opinion.

Surely there can be a middle ground somewhere? Where devotees of comics can meet safely and discuss their favorites without falling into bad habits? Where some pictures of old and obscure books can be posted without violating copywrite? Where I can snag a picture of Kyle's ass? I really DID buy the book but my scanner is on the fritz and I'm too broke to fix it! I swear!

Can't we all just get along?