Thursday's Reviews

As usual with the end of the month, this was a comparitively small  week for me.  But certainly an interesting week.

Aquaman #0

Well, I guess this is sort of an origin for Arthur.  It has his Dear Old Dad expiring, as young Arthur sits at his bedside, while outside, the media ghouls congregate,  since Shin spilled the beans about him being from Atlantis.  Naturally, inquiring minds Want To Know.  Arthur however is feeling cranky, so he rips off his shirt in front of the various reporters...which must have been quite the scoop...and jumps off of a cliff into the ocean below.

Then he swims for a while, and hang out with some very attractive fish, until an extremely large shark shows up, and does what sharks tend to do.  But for the first time, and probably completely by accident, Arthur uses his mind/meld mojo thingie, complete with the Vuu Vuu Vuu sound!  Cool!  And the shark decides he doesn't want to eat him after all.

Then he swims up to the surface and rescues a boat with an extremely attractive young lady and her father, who are just about to crash on some rocks.  He does this, basically by picking the boat up off of the rocks, which you have to admit is pretty impressive.  And shirtless too!  Certainly the young lady, who's name appears to be Jayne is impressed.  After some questioning, Arthur admits that he's looking for Atlantis, and lo and behold the Father is able to give him some possibly useful information.  So Arthur takes himself off to Norway to find some guy named Vulko.

So...Arthur shows up at Vulko's door, and Vulko just falls to his knees in joy, because the New King of Atlantis just stumbled into his living room.  And he proceeds to tell young Arthur all about his Mother, and his half brother, and various other interesting tidbits of information, and then the two of them go off to find Atlantis for REAL!

The art is of course exquisite, by Ivan Reis.  The story is interesting enough, giving us some information on Arthur's new origin, which I don't think is outrageously different from his old origin, although I may be mistaken on that point.  What I do mind a bit, is that I think Geoff Johns is going a little overboard *heh* on making Arthur such a BadAss character.  Granted, Aquaman was the butt of a lot of jokes, but in going to the other extreme, he's coming off as a bit unlikeable.  Not to mention arrogant and petulant.  I've always liked Aquaman, but this version of Arthur is a bit of a jerk.


The Flash #0

Well this was pretty good.  The art is lovely...again as usual.  We see a bit of Barry's childhood, and his relationship with his parents, who seemed to be on the outs.  When his mother ends up murdered, and his father is taken into custody for it, Barry is wholeheartedly on his father's side, and even becomes a forensic scientist mainly so that he can find the evidence to exonerate him.

Then he gets thrown for a loop, when his father admits that he was guilty and to stop wasting time on him.  There are flashbacks of course, and we see Barry in the hospital after the accident that turned him into the Flash, and he learns some stuff about himself, and it was all in all a nice story.


Jonah Hex #0

Oh Jonah...you must have the most horrible father in the history of the DC Universe.  For once, they didn't really change it all too much...and seriously why WOULD they?  Jonah has a fabulous origin story!  Oh, there were a few tweaks here and there, but it was a good issue.  At the end we also see some more scenes devoted to the whole Jekyll and Hyde plot, and I swear to God, that was Mei Ling on the last page, although I could be mistaken.  But wouldn't THAT be a hoot?

Pretty darned good.


Justice League Dark #0

I have been liking this book pretty well, but really, DC, WHY do you feel the urge to give John Constantine a new origin?  And tie it up with Zatanna of all people?  No more Newcastle, and all of those early issues that I have tenderly boxed and bagged are apparently out of continuity too.

Damn.

I have nothing against Zatanna, I actually rather like her, but John is one of my favorite Bastards, and he's just not nearly as twisted, and sardonic and conflicted in this.

I guess it makes sense for the new DC, but seriously....just...damn.


Which brings us to my favorite book of the week.

Journey Into Mystery #644

Holy Crap!

This entire "Everything Burns" storyline has just been fabulous.  It's a crossover between the Mighty Thor and Journey into Mystery, but without having to drag every other character in the Marvel Universe into things, nor is it 12 issues long.  But it has been beautifully drawn, and equally beautifully told.  It's also funny as all heck in some spots.

Loki is in trouble up to his ears.  Surtur is burning everything...and I do mean EVERYTHING!  Loki has been hanging out with Surtur, trying to cozy up and find out what is going on....he managed to get a hold of the shadow of his sword in the last issue, and he betrayed Thor into drowning in the pool in Muspelheim, and he set Volstagg and Hogun and Fandral against each other.  Thor is convinced that he's been betrayed, and the fact that he loves Loki makes it all the harder for him to bear.

But dang it, my favorite God of Mischief is actually trying to save everyone...albeit in his own...unique...fashion.  He's running from Surtur and the Hel Wolf who is tracking him. and then his own Hel Puppy offers to save him.  Too bad that Thori brings his Dad right to Loki, who is shocked...SHOCKED to be betrayed himself.

 

I have to admit that this part is hilarious, especially when Garm shows up and she and the Hel Wolf start throwing insults at each other.  The Disir have been dispatched by Hela to grab Loki, who as usual is trying to talk his way out of mess.  Fortunately for him, he's brought right to Hela, who offers to send him back in time to rewrite the story that he wrote with Leah the FIRST time.

This is a bit convoluted if you haven't been reading the books up to now, but trust me...it all make sense in the end.  Because he ends up back in front o Surtur again, not to mention the form of Leah that he had written into the tale the FIRST time, and it turns out that he did all of this...for her.  To save her, and he had to let the other nine worlds burn in order to help her.

It...its so sweet.

Oh, and Thor dies again, and washes up in Hel, and Hela, who has been in cahoots with Loki about this, now offers him warriors...who cannot burn, that have been trained by Bill and Kelda.  It's all so perfect that I may just swoon.

God, I do love this book, and if they do away with Loki when this is all through...well I'll be VERY pissed.

What "New Guardians" didn't Do

I have to admit, that I was slightly disappointed with the new Green Lantern: New Guardians book.  It's nice that Kyle teamed up with Carol, and it is more than nice that Carol got a new costume.  I was a little surprised to see the Zamarons cozying up to the Guardians, considering they pretty much couldn't stand each other. 

But what rather surprised me, is that there was no new origin for Kyle.  Because quite frankly, his REAL origin doesn't work anymore.  What a shock! 

Presumably Hal was never Parallaxed in this 52 Universe, at least that is my possibly imperfect understanding.  Therefore, why would Ganthet have gone to that alley and picked him?  Although it is certainly implied that Ganthet WAS the one who picked him, by none other than Sayd in the last issue.  Of course, I'm not sure exactly what lead to Guy getting picked by the ring in his new origin either...apparently it just happened to be flying by at the moment.  . Why...we weren't told.

So 'New Guardians" wasn't an origin story at all.  Maybe it is just as well, all things considered.  They could really never top this.



So...so adorable.

Green Lantern: New Guardians #0

I've been stalling on doing this one...but I suppose that I just can't put it off any longer.  And there are actually some rather decent things about this issue.  And some mindboggling horrible things as well.

We begin with Carol Ferris, who is teasing Tom Kalmaku for working late.  Naturally, they start to talk about their one true love...Hal Jordan.  They haven't seen or heard from him in a little while and are getting worried, so they decide to break into his locker and see if his lantern is still there. 

Right off the bat, this confuses the heck out of me.  When the Guardians stripped Hal of his ring, one would naturally assume that they stripped him of his LANTERN as well.  I know that Sinestro gave him a new one, powered from his own ring, but I wasn't aware, or if it has been mentioned, I don't remember...him giving him his own Lantern.  So should there even BE a Lantern in Hal's locker? 

Anyway...they can't resist snooping and Carol discovers what appears to be an engagement ring.  Naturally she is stunned.  Heck I'm stunned.  Then there is a Green Glow from Behind Them!  Carol is all excited!  But wait...it's only Kyle. 

Damn. 

I would have assumed that Carol and Kyle had met, but although they seem to know OF each other, they aren't much more than mere acquaintances apparently.  Kyle is there, because he's looking for a Star Sapphire.  Carol just wants to know where the heck Hal is.  Kyle is also looking for Colonel Jordan.

Colonel?  Hal?  What the Hell?  When on earth, did they make Hal a Colonel?  WHY on earth would they make Hal a Colonel?  Seriously, I am simply flabberghasted.  Is this some new 52 thing? 

In the middle of their discussion, Tom notices on the television that Hal and Sinestro are fighting Blackhand.  Carol decides this may actually be serious, and grabs her ring, and off they go to visit the zombies. 

Which leads to this.



Well I'll be dipped.  Carol decided that having all of her naughty bits hanging out was only making her cold, and decided to go with a new  costume!  I like it!  It's still awfully pink, but the black is an excellent touch, and she's actually covered up. She doesn't even have heels!  This is the good thing that I mentioned.

Kyle and Carol are smart enough to remember that you need TWO rings to fight Black Lanterns, and are doing a fairly good job, until they are overwhelmed, and suddenly Kyle is able to manifest the BLUE light of HOPE, and blow those Black Lanterns to Kingdom Come!  Woohoo!

It also dawns on them that maybe they should see if they can locate Hal and Sinestro, when the Ring announces that Hal is Deceased.  Kyle is bummed naturally, but Carol insists that it can't be true...that she would know.  Kyle scoffs at her and her silly feminine feelings, which pisses her off, and she wraps him up in some Pinkness, and all of a sudden, he's seeing a vision of the future, which has him using ALL of the various rings.  I wasn't aware that Star Sapphires could do this sort of thing, but hey. 

And finally, the Zamarons decide to show up and visit the Guardians, and lo and behold they want to do away with their Corps as well!

Gosh! 

Maybe this is a Maltusian thing?  Zamarons and Guardians are related after all.  And apparently they are all going nuts.

As I said, there were some things about this that I liked, Carol's new suit, and Kyle and Carol doing a good job together, but Hal a Colonel?  A Star Sapphire having the power to show the future?  If that was the case, why not show how to beat the crap out of those crazy-ass Guardians? 

This was a little on the weird side.

Slightly Late Reviews

I can't put it off any longer, I guess I need to do my reviews. Not that I can assume that anyone is clamoring for them, but because it makes me feel important, I guess.

Anyhoo.

Batwoman #0

Now this, was without a doubt probably the best book that I read all week  The art was gorgeous as usual, nothing out of the ordinary there, because I expect the art to be gorgeous.  But it was a wonderful story, with Kate telling something of her relationship with her father and her family and her background, and what training she went through to become Batwoman. 

Every time she goes out on a mission, she leaves a note for her Dad.  So we got to hear it all in her voice, from her point of view, and it was beautifully done.  And she finally admits that she loves her father, which makes me happy, because I really love his character. 

Twelve thumbs up!


Birds of Prey #0

I guess this was Dinah's new origin story.  She was going undercover to infiltrate the Penguin's gang, and find a Baddie, she meets Starling who is also working there, and then Batgirl busts in and threatens to blow the whole surveillance thing sky-high.  Oh, and  apparently Starling was also working for Amanda Waller, and Dinah used to work with Waller in the Suicide Squad, and it was ok, I guess. 

The art was a bit over the top, sort of a combination of Jim Lee and Ed Benes, by Romano Molenaar.  Not exactly my cup of tea.  I really miss Gail Simone and Nicola Scott.


Fables #121

And we finally get something of a finale to the whold Toyland story.  As you will of course recall, in order to save his sister, Dare sacrificed himself at the end of last month's issue, which was a real kick in the head.   Therese who has been a spoiled brat, suddenly realizes that something has changed, things are growing again in Toyland, which they never had done before, and it is because of Dare.  There is now food for her to eat, and she's all excited until she finally realizes what has happened, and it all turns to ashes. 

Therese mourns him, but finally realizes that she has to pick up and go on, and make the best of things, and the way that she feels she can do that is to restore Toyland, but she's going to make them work for it, by saving children's lives instead of causing them.  Then finally she goes home, to say hello to Mom and Dad, except she's grown now, and they aren't because time flows differently.

I was getting slightly bored with this story, but it had a very good ending.


Justice League #0

What the hell?  The Justice League isn't even IN this issue, but it does take up the story of adorable awful little Billy Batson, which has been the back-up story in the book.  I love love love Gary Frank's artwork, and always have, but I have to say that I really can't stand this version of Billy Batson, who is frankly a dreadful boy.  He's mean, sarcastic, and obnoxious.  He apparently has a few good points, but he's FAR from the Billy Batson of old.

The ends up in the Wizard's lair, and the Wizard has been trying for eons to find a perfect person to become Shazaam.  Billy points out that nobody's perfect, so the Wizard then and there decides, that well, ok then, you'll do, which seems a bit sudden and arbitrary.

He does become Captain Marv...oops...Shazaam, and saves a lady being mugged, and then bums $20 off of her so he and Freddy can go carouse or something. 

I know that the original Captain Marvel was a wee bit on the corny side.  But I didn't care.  I  really liked that Billy Batson, and I loved Mary and Tawkey Tawney and all the rest.  It was silly and childish of course, but it WAS for children!  It was...sweet.

There ain't no sweetness here.


Wonder Woman #0

And again, this was pretty darned fabulous.  This is a tale of Diana's youth, and the issue pretends to be an actual old comic, with a tale taken from "All-Girl Adventure Tales for Men, #41" which just cracked me up.   Chiang and Azzarello do a crackerjack job of making this seem like an actual Silver Age comic book, and I appreciate it very much.

Diana is young and training, and feeling a bit  at odds with her Amazon sisters, who treat her differently.  And who should show up, but Ares, who is more than happy to train her and show her that it's alright to be different.  And I have to say, that I enjoyed Ares in this as well, he seems to be having a pretty good time, as well as Diana. 

Then she wants to duel with actual swords, even though Ares warns her that with steel, a fight is to the death.  He beats her, and she's prepared to give up her life, but he spares her, because heck, he actually likes her.  Then he has her fight the Minotaur for her graduation more or less, and naturally after a slow start, she does a bang up job.  Ares shows up, and is all proud and wants her to finish the job, but the Minotaur opens his eyes, and she hesitates, possibly because his little tongue is sticking out, and he's all cute and such.  This makes Ares cranky and he yells at her,and tells her she's weak and stuff,   The Minotaur wakes up completely but instead of fighting, he just shuffles off. 

Diana is left wondering if mercy is a good thing, and she decides that it is. 

Fabulous!


The Mighty Thor #20

As we continue with "Everything Burns", Thor is feeling slightly less than charitable towards Loki, who last issue tricked him into falling into the molten lake, where he's being attacked and eaten and stuff.    Loki, whom to all appearances is being just as bad as his old self ever was, goes traipsing off to join Volstagg, Hogun and Fandral, and lets drop the fact that he and Volstagg were the ones who stole the Destroyer, which gets Hogun all hot and bothered, and the Warriors Three start yelling at each other. 

Meanwhile, Heimdall gets zapped by whatever mind-control thing that Surter has going on and things are looking quite bad.  Loki is visiting in Surter in his realm of Muspelheim, and sucking up and asking for Surter's plan of attack.  As Surter monologues, Loki manages to sneak a shadow of the sword again,  and sneaks off with it.  He also shows up in a vision to Thor, and tells him to let go, and let the darkness win...it will be ok. 

Oh, and Garm, the Hell Hound is back, and after Loki too. 

Gosh, this is great.

Performing My Civic Duty

Well, no reviews yesterday, and no reviews today, because I had to go and show up at the Courthouse for Jury Duty.  I've been called up before, but always was either dismissed, or had them settle or something.  This time, I had to go to the Courthouse, and stay in a small room with about 20 other people for hours and hours and hours.  Good thing I brought a book. 

At about 2:00 I was sent with five other people to an even smaller room, to wait for the Voir Dire.  Finally at 3:00 it was my turn, and I was a bit nervous, never having had to do this before.  This is where the Judge, the Prosecutor and the Defense attorny ask you a bunch of questions to determine if you are suitable to serve.  Apparently however, I know just too many police, not to mention one of my oldest friends is a Superior Court Judge, so the Defense Attorney didn't want me. 

I didn't really WANT to serve on a jury, since it looked as though it was going to be a couple of weeks at least, but I can't help feeling just a tiny bit insulted. 

Has anybody else served on a jury before?  What was it like?

What About Parallax?

Like a dog worrying a bone, I just can't seem to leave this topic alone.  In the NEW DC 52, did the whole Parallax thing with Hal even happen?  Was there time for it to happen?  What about Sinestro?  Did he get fired, get imprisoned, get killed, and then come back, and start the Sinestro Corps?  He must have actually done the Sinestro Corps, because they are still using the yellow rings.  This whole "five Year Continuity" deal, is awfully compressed.  I don't see how any of them would have time to eat or sleep. 

Did Guy ever use the yellow ring?  I would have to assume that the whole Warrior/Vuldarian phase of his life is completely out of the picture, which is rather a shame, because as crazy as it all was...I really really liked what Beau Smith did with him during that entire era. 

I can also assume that the bit with Kyle being the torchbearer is out?  Or in?  Did he save the Guardians by bringing them all back as children?  Perhaps that would explain their current state of nastiness...they are all basically thirteen?  I've HAD teenagers!  Your typical thirteen-year old, could give Lex Luthor a run for his money! 

There is no Kari Limbo for Hal and Guy to fight over.  There is no betrayal of Guy by Hal.  No coma.  No craziness.  But without Parallax, how did Hal come back and how did all of the different colored rings all come to be? 

I have to admit to being left just a little bit cold by the state of the rivalry between Guy and Hal as told by the recent issue of Green Lantern Corps.  It all seems...so tepid.  Granted, they are two alpha males, and I can see a certain puffing up of chests and sizing each other up.  But it lacks the grandeur of the old days.  Hal was arrogant, and frequently clueless, I still don't think to this day that he has any idea of how deeply he hurt Guy.  So Guy's feelings or resentment, and bitterness must be gone too, as well as his incredible capacity for forgiveness.  And considering that Hal was also his substitute for his dead older brother Mace, I rather miss that dynamic as well. 

We are getting decent stories.  I'm quite interested in seeing the Guardians get what is coming to them.  But for the life of me, I can't get too excited, because I'm not sure that in a year or two, these events will even count.  The whole vibrant, colorful, chaotic, and yes, messy heart of DC comics seems to have been drained away.  The new books are good for the most part...some of them are even very good.  But it has all been so...sanitized.

But I digress.

I can't help wondering if Parallax, who was on the loose, last time I checked, is responsible for this whole disaster with the Guardians and their Third Army.  Because it has been implied for quite a while, that the Guardians are simply rotten with fear.  And that's no way to run the Universe! 

Green Lantern Corps #0

Ok, enough shilly-shallying already.  Along with everyone else this month, DC has seen fit to give Guy Gardner a brand spanking new Origin.  They also changed his hair.  I...I am somewhat bewildered to say the least.

I can understand WHY they felt that they had to throw out his history.  To be perfectly honest, it is a little bit convoluted, especially the whole Vuldarian thing, but I absolutely adore Beau Smith, and therefore I could always live with the whole Vuldarian plot.  They also threw out the three-years-in-a-coma plotline, the Brain-damanged/Thug years, his entire history with the JLI...but they had already thrown that out...and his family problems, not to mention his extremely complicated relationship with Hal Jordan.

The new Origin is considerably simplified.  We begin with a rookie Guy fighting against a standard issue Bad Guy, with some fellow Rookies, all of whom are being decimated with a certain amount of ease.  But naturally, Guy has Willpower coming out his armpits, and prevails.  This leads Kilowog to grant him his Green Lantern stripes, as it were...but I'm getting ahead of myself.

 

We have a flashback, to a Police Academy Ceremony, where Guy's younger sister Gloria has just graduated.  His older brother Gerard is also there, and their Father, who is a retired cop as well.  According to the NEW Gardner lore, everyone in the Gardner clan has been a Baltimore Policeman, probably going back to the Revolution, to hear his Father tell it.  Except Guy, who washed out.  Oh, the heartache.  Guy has floppy long hair, but it isn't the traditional bowl cut.  Call me shallow, but I actually rather like it.  Anyway, he shows up wearing a black leather jacket and riding his Harley, to show how rebellious he is.  He and his Dad don't get along.  His Dad still drinks, but isn't nearly the magnificent Bastard that Rollie Gardner was.  But they still don't like each other.  Guy tries to make peace, but they start fighting until Guy hears on the police scanner that his older brother Gerard is in trouble...so he zooms off to the rescue.  Gerard has been hurt, and his nice partner Marcus whom we saw earlier has been shot, when Guy shows up and beats up all the of the evil Gang, and rescues his brother, and even blows up his own motorcycle...when a Green Lantern Ring just happens to be zipping by.

They don't ever explain WHY a  random Green Lantern ring should just show up...but it does.  It picks Guy because he has the ability to overcome great fear...blah blah blah.  He immediately asks it what it can do, and uses it to get his brother and his partner to the hospital, which was nice of him.  He also had some time to go back and put 96 felons in jail.

So, we go back to where Kilowog is congratulating him on making it to the Big Boy Leagues.  He's happy to have his symbol, but doesn't really like the uniform that much, so he changes it to his classic suit, with the collar and such, except that now it is supposed to recall his motorcycle jacket, as opposed to the Fist of the Guardians, whom do no exist anymore. 

Then Hal shows up to congratulate him, and they get off on the right foot immediately, with Guy calling him "Harold" and then mocking him because he doesn't get any press in the Justice League.  Hal sneers back about his jacket, and It Is On.


Okay.

This is much simpler version of course.  Short, easy to digest.  Brave rebellious young man, doesn't get along with his Father, but secretly the best of the bunch, is picked by the Ring, performs acts of bravery, and razzes his new Sector Partner. 

None of the stuff about Hal picking him, getting blown up, having Hal run off with his fiancee, being rescued by Hal, but going into a coma for a few years...being woken by the Guardians, but being a tad on the crazy side...now hating Hal's guts, fighting with everyone, but still proving he's fabulous, getting into the Justice League, falling for Ice, being incredibly obnoxious and annoying, and yet still one of the best around, fighting with Hal some more, losing his ring, getting Sinestro's ring, fighting with Hal some MORE, losing his ring, losing his powers, losing an eye, losing Ice, and going out and finding his own powers,  getting healed of the brain damage, getting his eye back, fighting with Hal,...being killed, coming back, getting his Green Lantern Ring back, being promoted to Honor Guard, not fighting with Hal quite as much, teaming up with Kyle, becoming the MOST popular Lantern of Sector 2814, and getting a Red Ring, and using it, getting a Violet Ring and using it, and saving the Guardian's tiny blue assess for the millionth time, and so on and so forth.

They have also completely wiped out his complex but important family life, and one of the reasons for his resiliency.  Guy has always had the worst luck, and was never handed anything...unlike Hal.  His older brother Mace (not Gerard) was his parent's darling, and Guy was always a pretty poor second best.  His mother was distant and a slob, his father was an alcoholic with a vicious temper, and they had a definite blue-collar existance.  Guy managed to get himself into college, worked as many jobs as he had to, got onto the football team, and graduated with honors in TWO majors, went out and got a job, taught kids, got engaged, and had a pretty good thing going until Hal showed up, and it all went to Hell.  Even when he was brain-damaged, he still manged to hang in there, and get the job done.  He may not have made many friends while doing it, but He Got The Job Done. 

So, I'm a little bit less than thrilled that his entire past has been wiped away and sanitized so completely.  Yes, it was a bit convoluted, but it worked, because we saw it unfolding before our eyes all through his history.    Of course everyone's history has been wiped out, and the new DC Universe is far less interesting than the old one. 

Guy's motivations are now gone, the desperate desire to prove himself, the rivalry with Hal, the very good reasons that he had for HATING Hal, but he never really did, the romance with Ice, and the fact that his mother has been wiped out completely, and damn it all, I LIKED Peggy Gardner!  She was a force to be reckoned with.  His new Dad, is still a jerk and a most unpleasant person, but he just isn't nearly as malevolent as his old Dad. 

On the other hand, I did like his hair. 

Slightly Late Reviews

Oh...it was an interesting week, to say the least.  Naturally, I shall not SAY the least...I do have a tendency to just drone on and on and on...well...you know.  So let us begin.

Batman #0

I'm not really sure exactly what to expect from the "0" books this month, but they all seem to be retconning the various origins or at least portions of those origins.  Batman is a tale of a young Bruce Wayne, who has just come home and set up shop in Gotham City.  He's running about doing his vigilante thing, but hasn't quite settled on the whole "Bat" Schtick, from what I can gather, or at least the whole "Bat" Schtick is still quite new.  Gordon reveals himself as no fool, Alfred is fabulous as usual.

The back-up story also looks at three of the Robins, with Tim being insufferable, but really really smart, Jason actually having a few morals, and Dick...well Dick is just as cute as can be. 

Not bad at all.

But I haven't read a bad story from Snyder yet, and the art is nice as always.


Batman & Robin #0

And in this book, we get a story about baby Damian!  He's just the most adorable little assassin ever!  Man oh man, does Talia have Motherhood issues though!  She won't tell him about his father, until he can beat her in battle, on his birthday.  Sheesh!  It takes him until he's ten.  Damian must be a late bloomer. 

I have to admit that the little psycho has grown on me.  And I love Pat Gleason, so I'm just happy as can be.


Demon Knights #0

Herein, we get a tale of Etrigan, and how he worked his way up...and down the ladder of success in Hell.  Also a bit of more backstory on Jason Blood, who had a pretty rotten time of it, and a bit of background on Merlin, who is a real jerk.  Nice story, nice art, and actually, rather nice coloring as well.  I do like this series.


Green Lantern Corps 0

What the Hell?

I...I'll have to read this a few more times I think.


Resurrection Man 0

So, Mitch has been captured, and we finally...FINALLY get to find out who is behind all of it, and how everything happened.  It turns out that the Big Bad Guy is Mitch Shelley!  He's been cold-bloodedly experimenting, and had these nanothingies injected into himself and other people, and lost his arm, but it didn't grow back, so he had it removed, and it...GREW IN MITCH # 2!

That...that is just so awesome, that I can hardly stand it.  The others in the organization all gained powers of various kinds, but not exactly what they were bargaining for, and the original Mitch is desperate for Mitch part deux, to harvest his lovely lovely organs or something. 

Then the Angel and the Devil-guy show up, and Good Mitch offers the Angel Bad Mitch's soul, and everything ends up happily!  Well...sort of, when you have maybe made a deal with the devil, but we can worry about that another day.

Damn, I'm going to miss this book.


Shade #12

This is finally it...the origin of the Shade, and drawn by none other than Gene Ha, who did such an amazing job in the other mini-series with the Shade.  He can draw a man in a top hat like nobody's business. 

We learn that Richard Swift was a happily married young man, with a wife and two small sons, who was doing well at business, loved his wife, and was good friends with none other than Charles Dickens.  He had a pretty good life!  Then Culp shows up and asks him to acquire a...lion for him.  Swift is a bit bemused, but happy to be of service, and hangs on his lips, as Culp tells him all kinds of exotic tales. 

Alas, it is all a ruse, and Dickie and Charles end up prisoners in an old church, about to be fed to the lion and a spell worked, to give Culp unspeakable powers.  Naturally it doesn't quite work out that way, and Dickie is the one who ends up with the powers, although Culp gets some as well, and everybody dies, except Charles Dickens, which is actually a good thing, and Richard Swift becomes the Shade, and it is all just lovely as hell. 

This has been one heck of a mini-series.  It makes me really really long for the old days with Opal City and Starman and the O'Dare's and all that really fabulous stuff that James Robinson can do.\


Journey Into Mystery #643

This is part of the "Everything Burns" storyline that is playing out in JIM and also in Thor, as Surtur is wreaking havoc across the nine worlds, the All-Mothers are hostages, the Vanir are revolting, and Hela is sitting on the sidelines, and presumably Mephisto is also up to no good.  But Thor still trusts his little brother.

Loki sneaks into Muspelheim and is contronted by  the evil Leah, that we saw on the last page of the last issue.  It's not the REAL Leah of course, but the Leah that he wrote into the story with the Serpent.  She's not particularly happy with Loki, who manages to talk his way out things as usual, because...well because he's Loki!  He also seems to have a whole lot of things brewing.

Thor shows up, and they discuss the fable of the Scorpion and the Frog, and then...well, then Loki shows that he is...Loki after all.

Bad Loki! 

But I am hoping that it is all a ruse of some kind, because if there is one thing that Loki is good at...it is running a con.

Man I love this book.

One heck of a week!

A Green Lantern's Chequered Past

So...there was this Green Lantern, who turned out to have stolen a vehicle...and I'm NOT talking about the new guy, Simon Baz.  No, I'm referring to my own best beloved Green Lantern...Guy Gardner.

 

As we all know, Guy had a pretty rotten childhood.  His loathsome parents made it clear that his older brother Mace, was the fair-haired child in the Gardner household, and from trying to win his Father's love to giving up and saying the heck with it,  Guy became somewhat of a Juvenile Delinquent.  In fact, right after his 18th birthday, his brother, who had become a Cop at that point, caught him joy-riding in a stolen car, had him brought to the football field of their High School...and proceeded to beat the ever-living crap out of him.  Then he stuffed some cash into his pocket, told him to go out and get a job and stop giving their Mom gray hair. 

Guy was actually smart enough to do just that.  Plus, he did have this whole love/hate thing going with Mace anyway.  He got a job, he got two jobs, he got his GED, he got into the University of Michigan, got onto the Football Team, no less, and graduated with a double Major, in Education and Psychology.  And he did it all on his own...with no faithful Butler, or billions of dollars, or knowing the right people or anything. 

So while I certainly don't APPROVE of stealing cars, maybe it isn't such a bar to being a Green Lantern as it seems.  And, if I recall, didn't Hal go to PRISON for a DUI back in the day?  I'm sure that's all been retconned out of existance...but still.  I remember it.  You might remember it too.  John may not have stolen any cars, but he does have this nasty habit of blowing up planets.  Kyle seems to have lived a pretty exemplary life, all things considered...at least in relation to his comrades-in-arms. 

Green Lanterns are Bad Boys wtih fabulous Behinds.  What more could you possible want?

Hal And Carol Got Married!

I'll bet that's a phrase that you never thought you would hear!  To be fair, let me back up just a bit here.  The ACTORS portraying Hal Jordan and Carol Ferris have apparently found love, and plighted their mutual troth.   Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively got married, which as a girl, I find simply adorable.   Those love scenes with them in the movie were REAL!

Anyway.  I like them both, and I'm sure they will have beautiful beautiful children.  And hopefully, a sequel. 

I Stayed Up Late

Yes, I actually managed to make it to Midnight, so that I could watch Robot Chicken, and its salute to DC Comics.  And even though I am SO tired today...I am glad that I did, because it was frikkin' hilarious.  It was bad enough the terrible terrible things that they were doing to Aquaman, but having Bane come by every couple of minutes and break Batman's back all over again, was a hoot.  Also, when Superman used his "Forget-Me Kiss" on Lois, and then realized that he could use it for a LOT MORE GOOD STUFF! 

Lex Luthor was a riot.  Sinestro was a riot.  It was irreverent, and silly and outrageous, and God help me, I loved it. 

Also...Ice showed up.  And Booster made an appearance, although he didn't say anything.  So it was WORTH it.

I miss this DC Universe.

Green Lantern #0

I must admit it...I had a certain amount of trepidation, in coming to this issue.  First there were all of the pictures of the cover, showing a young man wearing a Green Lantern Ring...and pointing a gun.  A gun?  And after reading Caleb over at Every Day is Like Wednesday, saying that he looked as though he had his underwear on top of his head...well everytime after that I just started to giggle a little bit.  That's probably not the reaction that DC was going for.

And yet...This wasn't terrible.  In fact...it was pretty good!

Doug Mahnke is back, and I love Doug Mahnke.  We begin with some dialogue-less scenes, showing our protagonist as a child, when 9/11 hits, and his family's reaction to it.  Young Simon Baz is of Lebanese descent and he and his family have to cope with the whole  reaction towards Muslims after the tragedy.

Anyhoo.   Fast forward, and he's lost his job and is stealing a van, which just happens to be full of explosives.  He didn't KNOW that it was full of explosives, but he's in one dilly of a pickle, and has to ditch the thing fast, so he heads towards his now closed-down factory, where he used to work,  and bales out of the van just before it blows up.  Naturally, he is considered to be a Terrorist, and is whisked off to presumably, Guantanamo, where he is undergoing increasingly rigorous questioning.  Naturally nobody wants to listen to what he has to say. 

He's going to be waterboarded, and resists, and is about to get shot, when lo and behold, Hal and Sinestro's combined ring, flies in,  notices that he has the "error" abiltiy to overcome great fear, and so on and so forth, and with a nice boooooom...he's outta there! 

The Feds are simply flabberghasted, that a Green Lantern Ring has chosen this fellow, and they call up Amanda Waller, who may be thin now, but is still a hardass...I guess.  She doesn't want to call the JLA, naturally.  Also naturally, Batman has been having Cyborg tap their phones.  It occurs to the League that they don't know what happened to Hal after he quit.

Meanwhile, poor Baz is passed out in a field, while the ring glows and says "Message Waiting".  And finally, in the epilogue, we see darkness and tendrils of white light...and Sinestro and Hal wondering where in the world they are. 

Geoff Johns has definitely piqued my interest. 

Reviews!

This was...something of an interesting week.  I'm still of two minds about several of my comics.

Action Comics #0

Well...I guess we started all over again?  I have got to repeat, that I love Clark running around in those old work boots, T-shirt and jeans.  And I enjoyed the little boy who used his cape.  The art was very pretty.   And I guess that the second story, was just more about that guy from last month or so.

This was a slightly mixed bag...but not bad at all.

Fairest #7

What the heck?  Beast is chasing some evil Fable, and competing with St. George, and she turns out to be a Lamia, and she's really Beauty? 

Seriously? 

That...that was weird.

Green Lantern #0

I...I don't really know what to think quite yet.

The Phantom Stranger #0

Again...I'm not exactly sure of what is going on here.  Is the Phantom Stranger supposed to be Judas Iscariot?  I thought that the thirty pieces of silver as his chain was actually rather clever, except that he wore a medallion, and a rockin' turtleneck back in the old days.

Sigh.

I am missing the old days more and more.  But if he fights with that Pandora chick, and we get the OLD CONTINUITY back, then I'll be happy. 

Man, I'm really starting to repeat myself.

Swamp Thing #0

Well, this was pretty good.  It was mostly about Arcane, and what a complete ratbastard he is, and a little bit of background, pre-Alex Holland, getting blown up.  Not bad.  Not bad at all.



Hawkeye #2

I picked up number one, on a whim, and I was awfully glad that I did.  I'm am just as pleased with number two.  The art is great, and the story is interesting, and it has Kate Bishop in it, and she rocks pretty darned well.  It has superheroes, but it is one of the kind of story, where it doesn't really matter, because the threat and the people fighting the threat don't actually HAVE super-powers.  Just darned good story-telling.

The Mighty Thor #19

We continue with the "Everything Burns" storyline, where all of the things that Loki has been up to lately seem to be coming back to bite him in his adorable little behind.  The sad thing, is that all of the things that are so horrendous, he actually did with the best of intentions. 

Surtur is stirring up all kinds of trouble, and there seems to be a fair amount of mind control going on, which Heimdall acknowledges, and the Warriors Three are acting a bit squirrely.  Thor, bless his heart, is still standing up for his little brother, who is also doing his very best to figure a way out of the mess.  And as for that last page...well I didn't see that coming.  Not at all.  And it doesn't really make much sense really, so I'm not necessarily taking it at face value.

But I am looking forward to seeing how all this shakes down.

So definitely a rather thought-provoking week.

Wonderful Wednesday

Goodness gracious, but I do love Wednesdays.  And with the new system of the books coming on Tuesday, even with a Monday holiday, we didn't have to wait until Thursday!  Which makes me smile, because I get very very childish when I can't have my comic books on time.

No more JLI on the first Wednesday of the month, alas.  Guy stomped off in a huff, presumably Ice and Tora and Vixen are still in the hospital, Omac went bonkers, all that old Brother Eye stuff came back into the picture and Booster is now gone. 

Damn.  It's not right to not have Booster.  The only bright point in all of this, is that they actually mentioned Rip Hunter, and I hadn't been sure up to that point if he even still existed in the new 52 Universe.

Frankly, I'm getting a little bit tired of the new 52 Universe.  There have been some decent books put out...and some not so great.  Batman and Green Lantern pretty much sailed through unchanged, but still things are just...weird.  And its starting to feel like all of the plots have descended into Fanfiction territory.  I have nothing against Fanfiction, some of which is pretty darned fabulous.  In fact, a lot of fanfiction writers are better at remembering Continuity than some of the Editors...but it seems as though too many of the writers have chosen this opportunity to simply start pairing up people that wouldn't ordinarily be paired up...yes, I'm looking at YOU, Clark and Diana!  And getting rid of people whom they aren't interested in, such as Wally or Cass or Stephanie, or any number of wonderful vibrant characters.  The writer may not be a fan, but there certainly are FANS out there who miss them. 

I think that I'm starting to wander from the point, which frequently happens when I get going on one of those Stream of Conciousness riffs.  What I am trying to say...is I'm ready for a return to the REAL DC Universe.  You boys have had your fun, and there have been some good stories...but...but I MISS my Continuity. 

If I were running DC, this is what I would do.  I'd bring in that Pandora person, and do a quick story that had everything get put back somehow, but in the way of doing it, a whole crapload of formerly dead but still fabulous characters would be back...heroes and villains alike.  I know I miss Doctor Polaris for example.  The REAL one, not the faux Polaris.  And Ted Kord of course, and Ralph and Sue Dibny, and Dmitri and Gavril, so we could have two cool Rocket Reds, and hell, just to show I'm a good sport...I would bring back Kari Limbo.  Just so that Guy could tell her to get lost.  Bwhahahaha!

If you were running DC...what would YOU do?

Terrible Tuesday

And it's back to work we go.  Blah.  Spent the weekend at Limerock Park, watching the vintage sports cars drive very very carefully around the track.  Probably one of the prettiest Race Tracks around.  But alas, it's back to grey skies and telephones.

So...to cheer us all up...




Granted, it doesn't show his incredible Ass-ets, nor is he getting hit in the head.  Nevertheless, he DOES seem to be making something of an ass of himself.  I mean really...who dances like that?  On the other hand, compared to the picture of Kyle dancing from last week...maybe this isn't so bad. 

I would imagine that John is probably pretty suave on a dance floor.  As for Guy...I don't even want to know.

Relax

It's Labor Day, and for all the people who have off today...enjoy it.   Enjoy the HECK out of it.  I know I am.  And for those people who have to work today...I'm so sorry.

Meanwhile...




For no other reason, than I really really miss these guys.

Green Lantern Annual

I had to sit on this one for an extra day or so, and re-read it.  And then re-read it some more.  And by Cracky, I think that Geoff Johns delivers.

Hal has been having something of a bad day.  He gets clobbered by Black Hand,and wakes up in a coffin.  Underground coffin.  Ring out of juice.  You can't blame him for feeling just a wee bit depressed.  But he thinks about Carol, and manages to dig himself out with his bare hands, clawing his way to the surface, where naturally it is raining buckets.  Fortunately for Hal, Black Hand is pretty lazy, so he wasn't buried too deep. 

He was also probably tuckered out from burying Sinestro too.  Hal grabs the shovel and starts to dig Sinestro out, while Black Hand stands around and gloats a bit.  Then he treatens to raise Hal's Father, which isn't a very nice thing to do at all.  For once, Black Hand manages to hit Hal where it really hurts.

Meanwhile, the Guardians are also standing around gloating and plotting more villainy.  They manage to wend their way to a place called the Chamber of Shadows, which happens to be where they imprisoned the First Lantern eons and eons ago.  As they are on their way, Brainwashed Ganthet happens to notice that Black Hand is back, which makes them all confident that they will be able to use him as a weapon. 

Once at their destination, they decide to uncork the bottle so to speak, and behold!  It is full of tiny blue adorable Hobbits!  They seem to be related to the Guardians, but are much much nicer, even though the Guardians shut them up in the Chamber to guard the First Lantern a helluva long time ago.  The poor little blue gnomes seem all happy to see their Brothers and Sisters and happily ask if the Universe has been saved yet? 

Oops. 

The Guardians snarl that things have...changed and for the worse, and by the way,they are here to use the power of the First Lantern.  It turns out that when they first shut him up, they made the NICE Guardians promise to never ever, under any circumstances, allow anyone to use his power.  When the NICE Guardians point this out, the EVIL Guardians brush them off, and say that circumstances have changed, and to get the hell out of the way.

Well!

Back in the Coast City graveyard, Black Hand is doing his darndest to raise Martin Jordan From The Grave, except that he isn't cooperating.  So Hal gets some gumption and starts flailing on Black Hand, who decides that he might just kill him after all, when he gets stabbed in the back of the neck with the shovel by none other than Sinestro, who hadn't been just lying around in HIS coffin, but digging his way out as well.  He and Hal have a little bit of their usual banter, then figure out how to summon his Green Lantern battery, and they smack rings together and Charge Up!  Woohoo!

I do have to say that Evan Van Sciver's artwork is just a pleasure to behold.  I love Doug Mahnke, make no mistake, but it is a joy to see Van Sciver, he's been gone too long, and he has such a way with Green Lanterns!

Back in the Chamber, the NICE Guardians are fighting the EVIL Guardians, who manage to stab the head NICE Guardian in the throat.  Sheesh! This cracks open the prison of the First Lantern, who needless to say isn't happy at all and starts yelling "LET ME OUT!"  Just like all of the rings have been doing lately.  Including Black Hand's ring!  And Hal and Sinestro's rings.

The EVIL Guardians fly off with the First Lantern, leaving the poor NICE Guardians to wonder what the heck just happened, and what corruption festers within their former brethren.  It was rather nasty of the EVIL Guardians to seal the NICE Guardians back in the prison, even though they took the First Lantern and there is nothing to guard anymore.  Nothing like rubbing a little salt into the wound, eh Guardians?

As the EVIL Guardians fly off, they just happen to notice that Hal and Sinestro are fighting Black Hand, so they show up, supercharge Black Hand, and it all hits the proverbial fan.


Believe it or not, Hal and Sinestro are actually dying, but they are still keeping their heads, and manage to recombine their rings, and find a new Lantern, and leave a message.   There is an "error" and then the ring leaves to scan for a new replacement, in a rather beautiful green glow.  The EVIL Guardians are all standing around patting themeselves on the back, and decide to use Black Hand for their own evil purposes.  Then they gloat a bit over Hal and Sinestro's deaths, and what they are planning to do to the REST of the Universe.  Guy and the Corps is next, followed by Kyle and the rest of the emotional corps

Finally, in the epilogue, they all gather together in the graveyard, and start siphoning off power from the First Lantern, who really really doesn't want to cooperate.  They leech white light of off him, and their own skin starts to bubble and then coalesce into their first member of the Third Army, and believe  you me, it is creepy as hell.  One of the Guardians even says..."It's Alive!" in his best Doctor Frankenstein kind of voice.  Some poor schlub of a guard wanders by, and the new Third Army Lantern grabs him, and rips his heart out and turns him into the second new Lantern. 

Oh just great. 

So.

Now we know where things are going to be going.  The Guardians have descended into more than common villainy, they are possibly the greatest villains of all, as they proceed with their quest to wipe out free Will throughout the Universe, by turning every living thing into a Zombie, more or less.   Probably more.

The stakes have been risen!