Hal Pictures Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!: A Green Lantern's Chequered Past

Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!

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Wednesday, September 12, 2012

A Green Lantern's Chequered Past

So...there was this Green Lantern, who turned out to have stolen a vehicle...and I'm NOT talking about the new guy, Simon Baz.  No, I'm referring to my own best beloved Green Lantern...Guy Gardner.

 young guy

As we all know, Guy had a pretty rotten childhood.  His loathsome parents made it clear that his older brother Mace, was the fair-haired child in the Gardner household, and from trying to win his Father's love to giving up and saying the heck with it,  Guy became somewhat of a Juvenile Delinquent.  In fact, right after his 18th birthday, his brother, who had become a Cop at that point, caught him joy-riding in a stolen car, had him brought to the football field of their High School...and proceeded to beat the ever-living crap out of him.  Then he stuffed some cash into his pocket, told him to go out and get a job and stop giving their Mom gray hair. 

Guy was actually smart enough to do just that.  Plus, he did have this whole love/hate thing going with Mace anyway.  He got a job, he got two jobs, he got his GED, he got into the University of Michigan, got onto the Football Team, no less, and graduated with a double Major, in Education and Psychology.  And he did it all on his own...with no faithful Butler, or billions of dollars, or knowing the right people or anything. 

So while I certainly don't APPROVE of stealing cars, maybe it isn't such a bar to being a Green Lantern as it seems.  And, if I recall, didn't Hal go to PRISON for a DUI back in the day?  I'm sure that's all been retconned out of existance...but still.  I remember it.  You might remember it too.  John may not have stolen any cars, but he does have this nasty habit of blowing up planets.  Kyle seems to have lived a pretty exemplary life, all things considered...at least in relation to his comrades-in-arms. 

Green Lanterns are Bad Boys wtih fabulous Behinds.  What more could you possible want?


At 7:06 PM, Blogger Erin S. said...

Well to be fair Kyle did have the worst luck with his love interests. But since half of them have been retconned it's no longer a problem.

At 11:42 AM, Blogger SallyP said...

That's true! I don't even know if he and Soranik ever got together any more.

At 11:05 PM, Blogger MetFanMac said...

A double major? Wow, didn't know that... was that a retcon or was it "official" before his knucklehead JLI days?

At 3:14 PM, Blogger SallyP said...

In his own book, Chuck Dixon did a great job on his origin, with his awful parents, his brother Mace, and what Guy did to get the heck out of there. Beau Smith only improved upon it. It may have been a bit of a retcon, but I prefer to think of it as more of a filling in of the details.


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