Hal Pictures Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!: I'm Torn

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Friday, September 12, 2014

I'm Torn

After my abysmal reviews of yesterday's books, I find myself in something of a quandary.  September is supposed to be a "Big" month for DC.  It is when they launched the current 52 Universe a couple of years ago, and each September they seem to be trying to come up with a newer and flashier gimmick.  Hence the lenticular covers and such...because it was SUCH a success the last time!  But this has to be the most depressing and horribly written Cross-over since Marvel's Gawdawful Civil War of a few years back.  That managed to accomplish weaning me off Marvel for quite some time!  I completely gave up the X books, and the Avengers and practically everything else, with a few...a very few exceptions.

So...I think that I am going to give the rest of my usual books a pass this month. I've bought two weeks worth and they were absolutely dreadful. Why on earth, would I continue to shell out my hard-earned dollars to buy MORE stuff that is awful?  That's...that's a bit crazy, isn't it?  None of this crap is going to mean anything in a couple of months anyway.  None of it makes any sense, and it is only a Cross-over in the vaguest of ways, in that everything is taking place five years from now, and EveryThing Has Gone To Hell!!!!!! 

Which means basically, I suppose that the DC Heroes are all pretty incompetent at their jobs.  At least in the new 52 Universe.  They've only been around for "Ten" years, and have managed in that relatively short amount of time, to completely fuck up everything.  Unlike the REAL Heroes, from the old Continuity, who have been around for a helluva lot longer, and have had their share of ups and downs, but managed for the most part to get things done. 

I'm not letting Marvel off of the hook either.  I managed to avoid reading the most recent Cross-over there as well, with the Death of the Watcher, and all of the "mystery" that ensued.  Who killed the Watcher?  Well, it turns out to have been none other than Nick Fury, who is actually old, and we've only been seeing LMD's lately.  Oh, and DumDum Duggan has ALWAYS been an LMD.  An LMD that could fool Wolverine, and telepaths, and everyone, because apparently Nick Fury is a sick twisted psycho, who now must sit on the Moon and be a Watcher too.  Or something.  It's...convoluted.  It's more than convoluted, it makes no sense whatsoever.  And it's a slap in the face of countless stories that came before it.  Oh, and I guess Ironman is going to be a jerk again.  Or a bigger jerk. 

Once again, Marvel  and DC are making the mistake of thinking that I want to read about out and out Villains.  I don't, I really don't.  I mean...I like Villains to a degree, some of them are quite charming in their way, and you certainly have to have a Villain to balance your Hero.  And while I don't mind a Villain being redeemed, or Anti-Heroes, I don't want my Heroes to be complete and utter jackasses.  I only want them to be partial Jackasses.  I AM a Guy Gardner fan after all.  But for all his past and current jackassery, Guy has always been a Hero through and through.  I don't want to see John Stewart become a murderer, just because his girlfriend dumped him. 

So it is all about ME as usual.  But am I alone in feeling this way?  One of the joys of my life is going into my beloved local Comic Book Store to pick up my books and engaging in a bit of banter about what is going on in our fictional worlds, and in general, the scuttlebutt has been..."WTF Are They Doing?"

There are bright spots of course.  The sneak peak of the Darwyn Cooke covers for December fills me with anticipation and delight.  Why?  Because those are the REAL DC heroes! 

 photo Cookeswonderwoman_zps885f3d75.jpg

Isn't this fabulous?

Or this...

 photo Cookesteentitans_zps0fc95e1e.jpg

Or even this!

 photo Cookesgreenlanterncorps_zps3911c507.jpg

Worlds of Wonder.  Heroes and Heroines, doing their Heroic thing. 

Even..dare I say it...Joy.

You have offered me a tantalizing prospect in the future DC.  But my patience is wearing thin.  Very very thin.


At 2:55 PM, Blogger Saranga said...


At 3:26 PM, Blogger CalvinPitt said...

I went the same route you're contemplating, and just passed on my DC books for the month. Admittedly it was easier for me since it's just the one, but I didn't see any sign this month's issue of Harley Quinn was going to be relevant to the ongoing story, so why bother with another dystopian future? Those are Marvel's shtick, anyway. DC is supposed to be the universe where things turned out sort of OK.

At 5:49 PM, Anonymous Boosterrific said...

Hear, hear!

At 7:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This might cheer you up!


At 5:47 AM, Blogger SallyP said...

Arynne, anything with Booster and Beetle makes me happy!

At 12:52 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just realized it! This is exactly why I cannot get into the new 52. Thank you!


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