Hal Pictures Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!: Reveiws

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Friday, February 25, 2011


Remember last week, when I was all happy and excited about my comics. Well, that ain't happening THIS week. This is the crankiest that I've felt about my books in a good long while, and not being a particularly nice person, I am nursing my misery with all my might.

Action Comics #898.

Actually, this wasn't bad. I haven't been reading it with any regularity, and I mainly picked it up because it had Larfleeze in it. I love Larfleeze. He looks a little bit different than he normally does, but what the hey.

Green Arrow #9. Again, not bad. Not great, but not bad. Etrigan has been freed from Jason Blood through the agency of the magical forest...somehow. The trees are fighting back, there's flames and fire, and Galahad gets eaten by a large tree. Oh, and big icky spider thingies show up. I'm assuming that this will all tie in with Brightest Day somehow.

Gotham City Sirens #20.

Whoa! Who knew that Harley could be so bad ass? I've always seen her as mostly comic relief, but she DID run with the Joker after all, and apparently there are a whole lot of things that she's capable of. This was actually pretty good, with Harley breaking INTO Arkham, and causing a certain degree of mayhem along the way, on her quest to kill the Joker. I doubt that she'll succeed, but it should be fun to watch her try.

Justice League: Generation Lost #20.

Oh...where oh where should I start? I really disliked this particular issue. It is the supposed back story of Max Lord. It doesn't make a whole lot of sense and completely contradicts several other stories, not to mention getting the names of his parents wrong, but hey...this is Winick! Continuity is for OTHER mortals! Actually reading up on your characters is for pussies, apparently.

Max has shot Jaime in the head...just like Ted! Oh, he's just so dastardly. Booster screams a lot, and they break into the Checkmate ship, and we are treated to a whole lot of flashback about Max and his motivations. Supposedly his father was a whistleblower for the company that he worked for, but they killed him and made it look like suicide. Hey, that's exacty what he's done to Ted! And his mother taught him to always have a plan, but she got blowed up when Coast City went kaflooey, so naturally that's why Max actually hates superheroes...because bad things are actually THEIR fault!

Max escapes, while still trying to make them believe that he's doing this for the greater good. Yeah right. They can't pursue him, because they have to take care of Blue Beetle, and Rocket Red manages to get through the armor, only discover that yes, he really is dead. Completely dead. Dead as a doornail. Pushing up daisies dead. Dead, dead dead.


Isn't that sad? Hold the phone, who put the croquet balls inside poor Tora's pants? That's truly scary. They match the ones on Bea's chest!

Sorry, I'm still not buying it. I don't think that Jaime's dead, and I don't much like Max's retcon either. What about his wife? The Conglomerate? Kilg%re? And all of the other stuff from his past that has been chronicled throughout the history of the JLI? This isn't QUITE as horrible as Ice's idiotic origin, but it isn't very good. Of course, right now I'm so pissed at Winick, that he could walk on water and cure cancer and I'd STILL be cranky.

This blows.

Justice Society of America #48

Why do I keep getting this? I don't like the storyline, it doesn't make much sense, and it's awfully hard to actually read. So I'm going to drop this. Again. Really, this time I mean it.

Power Girl# 21

This is the first issue of Power Girl that I've actually picked up since the departure of Amanda Conner. It wasn't absolutely horrible, but it wasn't very good either. It's nice that Peej is sorry for beating up the JLI, and it's also nice that she can actually remember Max Lord now. She's trying to convince Dick, and he keeps forgetting everything, then Bruce comes in, and HE remembers Max. He ad Dick dig up Ted's corpse, and after a lot of idiotic denials by Dick, they establish that Ted was indeed murdered.

There's just one teensy weensy problem with that. Ted's body isn't in his grave, Booster took it to Vanishing Point. So...it's awfully hard to perform an autopsy with no body. But hey, it's Winick!

I'm starting to really sound bitter.

And that's that. I need to cleanse my palette, so I think I'll go back and read all of my Giffen/DemMatteis JLI's and actually ENJOY myself.


At 2:59 PM, Blogger Sea-of-Green said...

It's time for you to get into the DC Universe Online! :-) People die and come back to life there ALL the TIME. Well, they don't really die -- but they DO get knocked out a lot. ;-)

At 3:12 PM, Blogger Erin S. said...

I know it's not funny but I am mildly amused that you seemed to be as peeved with Winick as I am with Giffin/DeMatteis. At this point I'll frankly be amazed if anyone actually pieces all these contradicting things into the right order.

On a JLGL note while I don't believe Jaime is dead I'm looking forward to Booster angst over it. They love tormenting him ever since Ted died. I'll be thrilled if the team hugs him (what, Tora did when she found out he was alive.)

At 4:31 PM, Blogger Eyz said...

I'm still pretty sure Jaime isn't dead...normally... I don't think so..Okay I hope not...Gyaaah! Stupid Winick :/

At 10:53 PM, Blogger LissBirds said...

"Max has shot Jaime in the head...just like Ted!"

And Aquaman just got his arm cut off, just like...Aquaman!

What is going on here, DC? You're like a broken record lately.

"Hold the phone, who put the croquet balls inside poor Tora's pants? That's truly scary. They match the ones on Bea's chest!" LOL. Just LOL. I noticed something off with Tora's buns, too, but I like your explanation a lot better than mine!

At 6:37 AM, Blogger SallyP said...

OMG, Beetle's DEAD! Quick let's zoom in on some T & A! THAT'LL cheer the fanboys up!

Sorry, sorry...I just can't seem to let go of my angst lately.

I WANT to like this book. It is a story about some of my very favorite characters...characters that don't necessarily get that much screen time elsewhere, as it where. So it is doubly painful to see them handled with such disdain and carelessness.

At 9:10 AM, Blogger Saranga said...

he really did kill jaime? fucksticks.

At 10:24 AM, Blogger MetFanMac said...

All signs points to this being a fake-out, and a very poor one at that.

On the off-chance that IS real, though, I simply won't care. You want to know why? Because I've been treating the entire DCU like a giant Elseworlds story, outside of the Giffen-Rogers "Blue Beetle" run. That's all that's canon. Everything else (PARTICULARLY Lian Harper's death) can go to Hell.

At 2:05 PM, Blogger CalvinPitt said...

Wait, uh, something happened to Jaime? Sorry, I was hypnotized by Tora's rear end. That is an Erik Larsenesque derriere she's been gifted with there. I'm going to agree with some of the other posters and guess fakeout. Telepathic illusion, clone, OMAC disguising itself at Max' orders.

Is Max still claiming to be following the White Entity's orders? If so, is there any chance he's being suckered? Max thinks he's accomplishing one thing, but in reality his actions will have some uniting effect among the heroes that'll make them better? That's the argument Rip used for why Booster had to let Hank Henshaw become Cyborg Superman and destroy Coast City, though. Not sure if that would be a plus or minus.

At 6:26 PM, Blogger SallyP said...

There has to be SOME sort of payoff at the end of all of this. Presumably Max will get his...somehow. And for this Max, that would be a perfectly satisfying result.

And yet...I still can't let go of the OLD Max. The REAL Max. Kooey Kooey Kooey Max. Who may have been a bit on the shady side, but was still an upstanding sort of guy when the chips were down. I miss that Max.

And boy howdy, but Tora's mom is going to be so pissed when she finds out that she's a figment of Tora's imagination. And all the OTHER people in the Ice Kingdom.

At 8:02 PM, Blogger Your Obedient Serpent said...

It's ironic that the only character in comics who has the appropriate vocabulary to describe Winick's writing is his own Barry Ween.

At 7:39 PM, Blogger ShellyS said...

I agree about Green Arrow and Gotham City Sirens. Harley definitely moved up in my opinion of her.

At 7:43 PM, Blogger ShellyS said...

As for Jaime, I don't read those books and I figure, if I don't read something, it didn't happen.

I'm now working on retconning my reading. I never read that Lian was killed and Roy lost his arm and is doing drugs... Let's say it all together: I never read that Lian was killed and Roy lost his arm and is doing drugs...

And Jaime isn't dead.

At 8:59 AM, Blogger mathematicscore said...

Good call on the Beetle Body move. Winick really isn't paying attention!

At 3:34 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

What they did to Blue Beetle killed my lingering affection for DC. Did they learn their lesson when told killing off legacy characters who were touted as diverse smacked of accidental racism? No. They keep on doing it. Fine. They either really are racist or as stupid as they appear. If Jaime remains dead at the end of JL: GL, my DC buying joins him. There are one or two DC series I unreservedly enjoy so I won't dump them (LegioN!) but any book I've been holding out hope on (Birds of prey, JSA, etc) will be off my list. Add to this DC canceling series I was buying to make room for Flashpoint tie ins I have no interest in picking up, and for the first time since 1973 my comic buying will go from 60% Marvela nd 40% DC to 95% Marvel. Way to go, ass hats...


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