Hal Pictures Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!: Beware Their Power

Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!

Now with Guy Gardner's Seal of Approval!

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Beware Their Power

In going through my books, I came upon this little gem, The Adventures of Superman, #473, from 1990, written by Dan Jurgens, and drawn by Art Thibert. I can honestly say that the only reason I even picked it up,was because there is an unshaven Hal Jordan, a grimacing Superman and a maniacally grinning Guy Gardner on the cover.

The action begins with Lois showing Jimmy Olsen her engagement ring. She and Clark are going to get married! Woohoo! Except that Clark still hasn't let her in on his little...secret. But anyway, what's that up in the sky? It is a green glowing Superman signal! Clark runs off to change clothes, while Lex Luthor also sees the sign, and figures that Superman is just taunting him now.

Meanwhile, Guy Gardner has a little peeping Tom action going with the ring, when who should show up hovering in midair outside his apartment? I'll give you one guess. Superman wants to know why Guy sent for him, while Guy makes it VERY clear that he did not send for Superman, and furthermore, wouldn't send for Superman if his face were on fire... or words to that effect.

Uninvited, Superman hops through the window, and says that if Guy didn't call him, it must have been the REAL Green Lantern! Oops. This of course annoys Guy to no end, and he reaches out and grabs Superman's cape...

Guy pictures

Oops again. Even Guy realizes that this perhaps wasn't the smartest thing that he could do. He even tells Supes that it's a nice cape. When Superman asks if Hal might be in trouble, Guy mentions that he's off "finding himself" again, but that he can trace him through his ring. Superman is all set to fly off and find Hal by his lonesome, but Guy insists on accompanying him, because even though Hal probably deserves whatever trouble that he's in, Guy is just too nice a guy to let him get hurt.

See, Guy really does care, he just can't let anybody know.

Meanwhile, back at the Ranch.... It turns out that Hal Jordan has been captured by some giant Alien Roboty thingie, who is using his Lantern to recharge himself, after having been in suspended animation for thousands of years. In other words, a typical day for Hal Jordan. He's busy draining Hal's ring, but he managed to send out the help signal with his last bit of energy. This is pre-Parallax Hal, by the way, but still mildly influenced by Parallax Hal, since he has the white temples, and hasn't shaved in about a week.

Not only is the alien Robot a bad guy,but he's brainwashed an Airforce General and post into doing his evil biding. So, when Superman and Guy show up, they are immediately attacked by fighter jets.

One thing that I do absolutely love, the two of them are just idlely talking on the flight and Guy lets slip Hal's name. And Superman asks if "Jordan" is his first or last name. Guy is quite astonished, he thought they were such big buddies and all, and Superman gets a little huffy, and starts talking about professional courtesy and all. Guy doesn't buy it of course...but then they are attacked by the missles from the fighter jets.

Guy of course thinks that it's Commies. Oh Guy! He has a lovely time destroying the fighter jets, one with a giant green screw, and the other with a giant dragon/snake/monster thing. Fortunately the pilots manage to eject safely, but Superman is fight to be tied. The General, who is under the influence of the big bad alien orders the soldiers to kill Superman, but at this point, they all figure he's lost his mind, and they surrender. Guy has located Hal's location underneath the airforce base, and down they go...

...where they apparently discover two old acquaintances of Superman's, named Dreadnaught and Psi-Phon. This part is actually pretty funny, you can just SEE Superman sighing and rolling his eyes. When Superman wonders aloud why nobody has put them out of his misery by now, Guy gets an evil grin, creates a green chainsaw and ACTUALLY goes "Bwahahaha! His feelings are quite hurt, when Superman stops him and says he wasn't being serious.

The further down they go, trying to locate Hal, the more strange alien technology they find. The mind-possessed General keeps showing up trying to stop them, but Guy just grabs him with a construct, and calls him Colonel Sanders. They do eventually discover Hal, who is happy to see Superman, but less than thrilled to see Guy. They are trying to figure out a strategy, when Hal's Power Battery attacks both Superman and Guy. They are in pretty desperate straits, but Hal manages to climb up the giant robot and grab his battery, and recharge his ring.

The Alien robot guy is trying to use the siphoned power to blast off and go home, but they can't let him do that, since he'd probably take out most of Wyoming in the process. He's too strong for any one of them, but if they all put their power...TOGETHER, then they can fight him!

"Get Together! Focus your minds and reclaiming the energy! Combined, we can OVERCOME him!" exclaims Hal.

"I'm NEW at this, but I'll give it a shot!" says Superman, grabbing Hal's and Guy's arms.

"Geez, I hate this touchy, feely stuff". Guess who that is?

Of course they win. The poor alien is all depressed now, all he wanted to do was go home. Superman tells him that they'd be glad to help him, they just didn't want him to wreck the place in the process. But he has to take Dreadnaught and Psi-Phon with him, because Superman never wants to see either of them again. Heh.

The Green Lanterns use their rings to haul the Alien's ship from underground. Hal uses a hook, while Guy uses a giant spoon. Guy just seems to have so much more FUN with his constructs than Hal. Guy also points out that he just hauled Hal's keister out of the fire, but Hal is pretty rude about acknowledging that.

Once out of the hole, Superman throws the Alien's ship into the atmosphere, and prays that he'll find peace and love and all of that.

This was really a pretty fun little book. Superman is pompous, Hal is arrogant as usual, and Guy is just enjoying himself throughout. I think that it drives Superman a little crazy to realize that Guy just doesn't hold him in that...reverance...that he is unconciously accustomed to receiving. And Hal is just embarrased by having to be rescued by Guy.

Good Stuff.

5 Comments:

At 4:03 PM, Blogger Captain Infinity said...

Come on, Guy! Are you telling us you've never listened to a Jim Croce album? You don't tug on Superman's cape!

 
At 4:46 PM, Blogger FoldedSoup said...

Gah! Captain I beat me to it! Damn you, Mountain time!

 
At 6:27 AM, Anonymous oxy moronovich said...

He beat me to is TOO! Curse you, Captain Infinity!

 
At 8:09 AM, Blogger SallyP said...

Guy DOES tug on Superman's cape! I also hear that he used to spit into the wind, but eventually stopped when it started to get gross and stuff.

'Cause Guy is COOL!

 
At 3:19 PM, Anonymous Rich said...

On the other hand, you don't see Guy messing with the Lone Ranger, and he's no pool hustler either.

 

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