Hal Pictures Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!: Green Lantern #1

Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!

Now with Guy Gardner's Seal of Approval!

Friday, September 16, 2011

Green Lantern #1

Oh Sinestro...you bad bad boy. And yet...as we all know, bad boys can sometimes be just so good. In a bad way. Or something.

The Green Lantern books are probably going to sail right through the new DC relaunch, more or less unchanged. After all, why screw with a good thing? Geoff Johns and Doug Mahnke are still on Green Lantern, which is a good thing because I LOVE Geoff Johns and Doug Mahnke on Green Lantern!

As we begin, the Guardians still have Sinestro all chained up, and he's reciting the oath for their pleasure, and getting a bit testy, as who can really blame him. Despite all of their...shall we say differences...over the years, the Guardians still think that giving Sinestro a ring, and sending him back to Korugar is a dandy idea. And so they do. Sinestro STILL thinks that the Guardians are losers, and STILL thinks that he's right and completely justified in everything that he's done. Ganthet is the lone dissenting voice, and when he tries to explain that letting one of their greatest enemies loose with one of THEIR rings and a power battery may be just this side of insane, the rest of the munchkins turn on him.

Poor Ganthet.

Stupid Guardians.

Meanwhile, back on earth, Hal is having a bit of a problem...adjusting to normal life. It's been quite a long time since he's HAD a normal life, and even then, being a hotshot test pilot isn't your run-of-the-mill sort of job. His landlord isn't too excited with him, and suddenly, Hal sees what looks like a mugging going on in the next-door apartment, and he leaps OFF of the balcony, and tries to save the fair-haired damsel in distress! Oops. It's actually a television or movie set, and gosh, is Hal's face red!

Carol comes and bails him out, and gently tries to explain that he can't fly, because he's uninsurable...but that there are other things that he can still do to earn a paycheck, and that MOST people have to suck it up and earn a living. I get the feeling that her words of wisdom are going right in Hal's shell-like ear and out the other. Obviously Hal's not paying a whole lot of attention, but he DOES ask her out, which she considers to be a positive sign at least.

Sinestro, has been observing Korugar, which he left under the care of the Sinestro Corps. They...haven't been the best caretakers, and he's starting to get pissed, when one of his earstwhile cohorts shows up, all full of piss and vinegar. He's a little startled to discover that this random Green Lantern is ACTUALLY his boss, and tries to tattle to Arkillo. Sinestro handles that in his usual...efficient manner. Quite frankly, I'm a little bit sorry for the the Sinestro Corps hanging out on Korugar, because I'm pretty sure that they are in for an extreme ass-whuppin'.

Back on earth, Hal and Carol are having a nice dinner together. Hal even seems as though he had actually paid a tiny bit of attention to what Carol was trying to tell him, saying that his ring has moved on, and he should do so too...and he has something to ask her. Something important.

Carol leans forward, lips parted, expectantly, waiting...waiting to hear those words from Hal...and he asks her if she'll cosign on a car loan for him.


At this point I just about lost it. The look on poor Carol' face is priceless. Hal is completely clueless of course. She dumps her drink over his head and walks out, and then Hal trails after her, whining that she was the one who drove. He's quite flabberghasted to discover that she was hoping that he might actually be proposing to her, and is stupid enough to make it abundantly obvious to Carol that he IS flabberghasted.

He then trudges home in the rain, to discover his belongings sitting out in the hall and an eviction notice on his door. But not to worry, because SOMEone is standing in the hallway as well. Someone with a solution.

I have to admit it...I absolutely loved this. I find the aspect of Hal being stuck on earth, without his ring, and without his powers, broke, homeless and as stupid as ever...simply delicious. Because finally, FINALLY...he knows what it's like, when he took away Guy Gardner's ring waaaaaay back when. And you all know what Guy did. He continued to fight the good fight anyway that he could, and then he went and figured out a way to go and find Sinestro's yellow ring, getting help from Lobo, going to Qward, going to Oa, and stealing it off of Sinestro's corpse. THAT'S gumption! We'll see if Hal does half as well. Because it serves him right.

And it's funny.


At 6:05 PM, Blogger CalvinPitt said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

At 6:09 PM, Blogger CalvinPitt said...

Dang it, I typoed the heck out of that comment. Let's try again. What do you think is the most likely end result for Hal?

The Guardians giving him his ring back during the next cosmic catastrophe?

Sinestro gets tired of dealing with the Guardians, appropriates a yellow ring, then gives Hal his GL ring, because where's the fun if he doesn't have Hal to fight with?

One of the other Corps recruits Hal because they noticed that he always seems to win somehow? Plus, he's worn practically every other ring at some point.

Not that I'm looking for any of those to happen soon. Hal can struggle through ordinary life for a while.

At 2:41 AM, Blogger Gary said...

I loved this issue - Hal's total stupidity in dealing with Carol made me want to smack him round the head and say "Get a clue, man."

Thing is, I think it's all those smacks on the head in the past that's led to this.

At 6:20 AM, Blogger SallyP said...

Don't you hate it when you've typed out a witty and pithy comment, and somehow it disappears? I HATE that!

Man, Calvin, I'm just not sure how Hal's going to get his ring back...although I'm sure that he WILL get it back. Eventually. But yes, some of the spice has to have gone out of Sinestro's life without Hal to cross wits with.

Wait...in order to cross wits, you actually have to HAVE wits! But you know what I mean.

And yes, Gary, Hal's monumental stupidity in dealing with Carol is...well, monumental. And hilarious. The prospect of Hal having to bumble around in civilian life for a while thrills me. Maybe he'll actually learn a little wisdom and humility! On the other hand, this IS Hal that we're talking about.

My greatest joy, would be for Hal to get a hold of Carol's Star Sapphire ring...and have to wear "that" costume for a while. Because Guy and Kyle and John would never let him hear the end of it.

At 9:30 AM, Anonymous JimmytheJiver said...

Didn't Hal already have a phase where he didn't wear a ring back in the 80's when John Stewart was Green Lantern? Sure it was before Guy entered the picture again, but it happened unless Geoff Johns rewrote it.

At 7:41 AM, Blogger SallyP said...

Oh heck, Hal has quit a couple of times before. Once because Carol told him it was her or the highway...so he went whining to the Guardians to quit, and rather bemused...they let him. About a day later, he was whining about not having the ring. This is right about when the Crisis hit, and Guy woke up from his coma. Some of the Guardians picked Guy to be a GL, and Hal was just SICK with jealousy. Naturally, he ended up getting his ring back and was thrilled to pieces...despite losing both Barry and Tomar Re.

But that was on HIS terms. As usual.


Post a Comment

<< Home