GAL GARDNER: Warrior, #42

Yes, you read that right...GAL Gardner. This is the infamous issue titled "A Gender Bender in the Blender". It is also one of my favorite issues. Beau Smith was in a particularly manic mood at this point...probably because he'd heard that they were going to cancel the book in only a few more issues, so he figured what the hell?



Yes, Guy wakes up and stumbles his way into the bathroom, turns on the light and ...starts screaming at the top of his...er...her lungs. Everyone else comes piling into his room only to be confronted by a stunningly bodacious version of Guy.

So, they are all standing around trying to figure out just what the heck happened. A Fedex package shows up that Zinda signs for, and it turns out to be a note from none other than Dementor, who not only is responsible for Guy's present predicament, but has also taken hostages at a high-falutin' fashion show. If he wants to be changed back, Guy has to show up...ALONE! Of course it's a trap, and everybody knows that it's a trap, but really, what other choice does he have really?



This, by the way, is Dementor. This isn't a panel from this particular issue, but it is a great depiction of him. He's the REALLY creepy and disgusting creature that is one of Guy's main villains throughout the Beau Smith run on the book. He's revolting of course, but he DOES have a completely horrifying sense of humor.



Guy is severely pissed of course, but he's not going to let something as unimportant as being transgendered get in his/her way. I also am completely delighted by the fact that this is one of the VERY rare instances when a hero/heroine changes bodies, that the female version is actually wearing MORE clothes than the male version.

At this point Martika shows up. Martika was introduced a few issues back, as the mind-controlling villainess. Since she can only control MEN'S minds, she is quite taken aback at the sight of Gal...er...Guy. He's going to go off and confront Dementor, but Martika spies the note that Dementor sent, and quietly purloins it, before stamping off in a huff.

Zinda then flies Guy over to the Fashion House in the every handy helicopter. Guy is still in shock of course, but he's handling his current status fairly well, all things considered. Zinda keeps asking if he's ok, and he says of course not, and stop staring! He also can't cross his arms. I will say, that the artist, Marc Campos gave Guy a truely splendiferous bosom. In fact, he's probably in the Power Girl category, which can't be adding to his state of mind. Heh.

Meanwhile, Dementor has murdered the designer, Mr. LaVour, and taken the audience and models hostage. Guy lands on the roof, and discovers that Dementor has left another note for him, so he/she busts down the door, figuring that subtlety isn't needed at this point. He/she shows up in the main room, mad as hell, not going to take it anymore. Unfortunately there isn't a whole lot that he/she can do, while Dementor is holding all those hostages.

Things get pretty weird at this point. Being a HUGE pervert, Dementor demands that Guy do a fashion show, so he has to strut around wearing all these ridiculous outfits. He's NOT happy about it, but his/her hands are tied at the moment...figuratively speaking.

Just then, who should break in, but Martika and her goon squad. Guy, who is currently wearing a French Maid's outfit gives a squeal...which just cracks me up. Martika is trying to control Dementor's mind, the way that she did back at the Christmas Party at Warriors, but this time he has his evil stepdaddy Mudakka there to help him. Being a very competent woman, Martika calmly has one of her goons shoot Mudakka dead. So much for mind control!

In the meantime, Guy has managed to free all the audience and the hostages. Martika also forces Dementor to turn him back into his old manly self. While Guy is relieved to be back in his own body, he's not particularly thrilled with Martika, since he's finally realized that she's working for Quorum...the outfit that killed his brother Mace, and has given him all kind of trouble. Martika doesn't care, she's trying to put the mental hoodoo on Guy again, when who should show up in the nick of time, but Veronna and Zinda. Veronna's mind-link with Guy saves him from Martika. He's about to grab the bad guys but Martika and Dementor manage to get away.

Veronna has been telling Guy for quite a while now that Martika was a BAD girl, and now he finally believes her. It's about time, Guy!

Kalinara has talked before about how much she likes this issue, and I must say that I agree with her. It's fun because Guy's personality and characteristics are just the same when he's a woman as when he's a man. He didn't suddenly gain any "female insights or sensitivity". He's just as rude and obnoxious and cranky as he normally is.

To this day, however, I do regret the fact that Hal Jordan never got to see Guy in his French Maid's outfit. Having Guy have to fend off a lustfilled Hal would have been hysterical.