Hal Pictures Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!: Green Lanterns and Fatherhood

Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!

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Monday, March 19, 2007

Green Lanterns and Fatherhood

Over at "Pretty Fizzy Paradise", Kalinara has been speculating lately about the possibility of Hal Jordan having children. She went further and postulated that Hal may have a gay son, which I find hilarious, and getting smacked around verbally and probably physically by Alan Scott. I really find this to be an interesting concept.

First, I'm not sure that Hal has had any real contact with Todd...or Jade for that matter. They weren't really around too much before he went all Parallax, and then he was the Spectre, and lately he's had his hands full since "Rebirth". So, I can see him making some stupid comment, and being royally schooled by Alan. And that would be fun, because Alan is about one of the only people in the Universe, who can make Hal Jordan sit up and behave.

Anyway, I find the concept of Hal having a plethora of illegitimate, half-alien children to be compelling...and funny. I can't believe that he doesn't have a least a couple squirrelled away somewhere. He's been at this whole Green Lanterning thing for quite a while now...if Ollie can have grown children, so can Hal.

Actually however, I think that I would prefer Hal to get dumped with a baby...mainly because he'd go completely to pieces. He'd try to con any number of available women to take over for him, either Arisia, Cowgirl, Carol, Dinah, etc. Failing any competent women, he'd try to pawn the little beggar off on his fellow Green Lanterns. This would probably not work. Seriously, can you see Hal and Kyle and a crying baby? Haw!

Of course what would happen, is that Guy and John would take over, because Hal and Kyle can't be trusted to feed goldfish, much less a baby. John would be competent and efficient, because that is what John is. And Guy, well he did used to be a teacher, plus we all know that he's really just a big softie underneath all the crusty, testosterone-laden exterior.

Of course, we could expand this whole idea, and bring in the whole darn Green Lantern Corps. Kilowog would probably be fantastic with kids. Salakk would be horrified of course, but quite handy, with all those extra arms. Soranik would be good at the immunizations and ear infections, but I don't really see her as being particularly maternal. Boodika on the other hand...would be hilarious.

The Guardians would probably make them give the poor little mite back though. "I don't care if it did follow you home, give it back to Jordan!"


At 10:11 PM, Blogger FoldedSoup said...

Hal having an illegitimate (or several) alien kid(s) is dynamite! Great plot!

But - it has the potential to be both handled well - or so, so badly. That's a writer "depends on" series. Dunno if I'd give that one Johns.

Great thought!

(I picture a pink/red humaniod baby girl!)

At 8:39 AM, Blogger SallyP said...

This is Kalinara's idea, but I love it. And a baby girl would be the most fun I think.

I just love the idea of Hal becoming completely unglued.

At 8:17 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've thought about that, too, but all of the GLs seem to be uncannily good about staying out of that kind of trouble. Perhaps their rings also provide them with birth-control protection in addition to shielding them from sudden death. ;-) Hey, if Hal's ring can save him from being shot in the back of the head at point-blank range, then surely it can also save him from the perils of impregnating some wayward alien babe. However, if Hal does has a kid anywhere in the universe, then it's probably with Dorine/Onu Murtu, who Hal first met way back in GLv2 #36 and then met up with again when he was exiled in space. Hal and Dorine were quite the item in space, though Hal regarded Dorine mostly as a way to keep from getting "lonely" -- and she was completely infatuated with him.


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