Hal Pictures Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!: Nazi Green Lanterns

Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!

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Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Nazi Green Lanterns

Whoo boy, is this one weird book. This is an Elseworlds tale, told in Green Lantern Annual #3, written by David de Vries, with art by Dean Zachary. In this alternative reality, Hitler won, and the whole world is under Nazi domination. Heinrich Himmler, leader of the SS, has pledged himself to some scaley lizard alien, and has gained the power of the "Ring".

That's a pretty mind-boggling beginning, and it just gets stranger and stranger. Hal Jordan and Guy Gardner are good little Nazi officers, while Oliver Queen is leading the resistance with his gang of Green Lanterns. They are inducting John Stewart, when their group gets attacked, and Ollie is killed, along with most of the others, although John manages to escape...right into the arms of Carol Ferris! Oh, the plot thickens.

Creepy aliens are chasing Hal, and Guy is hanging out with this hot chick who apparently runs things, named Karelia. Meanwhile Hal ends up with a yellow ring, it is rather convoluted how, and beats the crap out of Guy, when he tries to confiscate it for the State. So at least a few things haven't changed! Karelia sacrifices the remaining captive Green Lanterns and gives another ring to Guy, who looks amazingly hot in his little Nazi outfit. I think it must be the hair.

All thrilled with his ring, Hal goes off to find Carol and finds her in bed with John Stewart. He's less than pleased, mainly because they are all rotten racist creeps now, but he takes off and leaves them alone, only to be captured by Guy, who is must be admitted is much more efficient than Hal when it comes to being really evil. John and Carol are about to be executed, when Hal busts in to save them, which is kind of strange considering he was trying to kill John just a little while ago. Guy and Hal fight with the green and yellow rings for quite a number of panels, but Hal wins of course, and then is being seduced by Karelia who wants the ring for reasons of her own. Turns out she is the evil lizard alien from waaaaay back in the beginning. Somehow John gets loose and kills Karelia, who promptly blows up in a very messy fashion. This makes Guy cranky, and while Hal is standing there bloviating, Guy stabs him dead, which is certainly something out of the ordinary. However, as he stands there gloating over Hal's body, John picks up Hal's ring, and after a whole lot of pages of fighting and insults, he kills Guy, who although he was quite nasty, was a lot tougher than Hal.

So John ends up the one true Green Lantern, and he gets to save the earth from the Nazis and gets the girl too. I realize that this was an Elseworlds story, but I don't really understand quite what it was that the writer was trying to convey. Nazis are bad? Well, duh! John ends up being the hero, which is nice, but he really doesn't have much of a personality, and he sure doesn't have the best lines. To be frank, Hal is kind of a weenie. Guy has the best outfit and gets to be the most evil which is always fun. All and all, kind of a strange little book.


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