Hal Pictures Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!: March 2007

Green Lantern Butt's FOREVER!

Now with Guy Gardner's Seal of Approval!

Friday, March 30, 2007

Just some Random Pictures

I haven't got an original thought in my head today. So I thought that I'd just take a casual stroll through my pictures, and see if any looked interesting.

Gu pictures

I like this one of Guy for some reason. He just looks slightly crazed, which I am sure is appropriate. That's also a very nicely drawn collar.

Hal Pictures

This is a nice one of Hal. Oh look, he's arching his back and showing us his...assets. Nice buns too. I love Hal, but he really is quite quite shameless.

John Stewart

Oooh, look, it's John, Ch'p and Salakk. Poor Salakk, he's been so depressed since Ch'p got squished. I mean, he was depressed BEFORE as well, but now, he's even more so. And that's saying something. Perhaps that nice Mr. Johns can bring Ch'p back from little nut heaven, so that Salakk will get off of Guy's back for a change.

Hal and Ollie

Well, isn't this nice. Ollie and Hal are frolicking in the water. It's probably a pretty hot day, and they figured that some jolly water sports would cool them off.

Guy pictures

Uh oh. Bad bad bad Hal. He just beat the crap out of Guy, AND took his ring into the bargain. No reason really, just because he could. And then he gloats about it. BAD HAL.

My Drawings

Ok, actually I drew this one, from a panel in JLI, just expanding it a bit. Hmmmm...I seem to have something of a theme going on here, with Guy lying around unconcious. Still, it came out reasonably well. Ooh, look...there's Fire!

Guy pictures

I guess we'll end with Happy Guy. And his perky nipples.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Green Lantern #18: Love Stinks

Hal Pictures

Yes indeedy, it's THAT cover. I have to say however, that I rather enjoyed this slightly shorter story. The story was cut a bit, to make room for the Tales of Sinestro Corps, which is also fun. Anyway, we've all discussed this cover so let's just jump into the book, shall we?

Hello? That's not Ivan Reis's art! It is Daniel Acuna, and it is very very shiny. I must admit I was a bit nonplussed, but it isn't bad at all...just different. I actually rather like his portrayal of Hal, with his hair all mussed. Cowgirl looks pretty good too.

But back to the story. There on the front page is none other than Tom Kalmaku, aka Pieface, all dressed up in a suit and standing up to a bunch of rather snarky suits. Carol in the meantime, is up flying, and from her demeanor, having quite a good time of it. There is quite a bit of exposition on Carol's part, explaining her relationship with Hal, and what she has been up to lately, when suddenly...

...There is a giant PINK explosion, and Star Sapphire is in the plane and has Carol by the throat. The Star Sapphire then starts explaining that since Hal desires Carol, she is therefore the perfect host for the apparent alien that is Star Sapphire. This is a bit of a differing explanation of who and what the Star Sapphire is,but what the heck. The creature jumps from the original host Krystal, to Carol, leaving Krystal all naked and terrified and alone on the plane. Then there is a shot of Carol as Star Sapphire flying away from a rather large explosion. I guess things didn't go so well for the first girl.

Cut to a bar, where pilots are sitting around drinking and playing pool. Hal is shooting the breeze with Cowgirl, who is drawn rather nicely, with a cowboy hat and reasonable breasts. They are discussing the Ring, and it's also rather nice that Cowgirl seems to be pretty cool with the whole idea. Interestingly enough she says that she wouldn't fly with the ring either. It's very obvious that the two of them have a lot in common.

They're both pretty and stupid.

Sorry, that's not very nice on my part. I just think that flying without the ring is REALLY dumb. You wouldn't fly without a parachute would you? I don't know, maybe Hal feels that is going to impede his ability to fly too.

Another giant PINK explosion! Pink plastic Carol shows up and plants a big wet one on Hal. Oddly enough he does nothing to fight her off, but Cowgirl clocks her with a chair. At which point Hal changes into his Green Lantern suit and claims that there is enough of him to go around for the both of them.

Oh Hal.

I did find this funny however, as Hal flies off to deal with Carol, who he has punched into the

"Who IS that?" asks Cowgirl

"An Ex-Girlfriend"

"She always this bitchy?"

"Only when she's possessed by a telepathic alien crystal. Well, and when she doesn't have coffee." replies Hal.

"What does she want?"

"Um...one last fling, I think. But I can't do that...she's married."

"She sure don't act like it" harrumphs Cowgirl.

So Hal flies up and grabs Carol, but the crystal is beginning to wise up, and senses that Hal has the hots for Cowgirl instead, and dumps poor Carol in midair. Cowgirl is less than pleased, but doesn't have much of a chance against the telepathic alien crystal. Hal carries Carol down,and she manages to say that she actually has some useful information...that she knows what the Star Sapphire IS, and that it is from Sector 1416...they all are, The Zamarons, Sinestro...when the two of them are interrupted by Cowgirl/Sapphire.

Pink is NOT her color.

Then we have the "Tales of the Sinestro Corps", drawn by Dave Gibbons very nicely. Amon Sur wanders into the library on Qward and runs into Lyssa Drak, who keeps the book of Parallax.
She proceeds to tell the tale of Despotellis, the nasty little virus that apparently wiped out 85% of a sector.

I enjoyed the story and the art of course, but what I found REALLY interesting, is that Sinestro is apparently doing his level best to recreate the Sinestro Corps as a dead-on copy of the Green Lanterns. He just can't seem to let go. The whole shebang is as close to a carbon copy of Oa as he can make it, he's even trying to recreate a whole mythology for himself.

It reminds me of when Guy Gardner had lost his ring to Hal Jordan in GL #25, and then wandered around in his old GL uniform for quite a while, because he just couldn't let go of it. Eventually of course, Guy managed to move on, but I don't think that Sinestro has. I think that his is a VERY interesting development.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Mutants are...Boring?

I admit it, when I first started reading comics as a young and impressionable lass, I was a Marvel Zombie. I considered DC to have likeable, but dull characters. Marvel was where it was at, and I bought "Giant-sized X-Men" off the spinner rack at the drug store. I LOVED X-Men, and read it all religiously. I was there for the Dark Phoenix saga, the Starjammers and the Shiar, running off to Australia for some reason, Inferno, Massacres and so on and so on.

I've got to say that lately, it's been getting...boring. With the exception of Amazing, which only comes out every blue moon, I have done the unthinkable, and stopped buying Mutants. Well, I do still get X-Factor, because frankly it is pretty damned good, but that's it.

I do still get Wolverine, because although I guess I have to blush, I always rather liked Wolverine, but lately...it's been getting a bit weird. While I can certainly understand that Logan may have illegitimate children stashed all over the globe (Hal Jordan isn't the only playa!) the idea of him having this grown kid, by a completely unknown woman is just...odd. And he's...EVIL!!

I'm not too sure that I remember his name, so inspired by Brandon, I'll call him Stabby McGee. He has a really BAD haircut, and considering that we are talking about Wolverine, that is saying something. So they are probably going to fight and stuff. Big Whoop.

Meanwhile while I adore Simone Bianchi's artwork, Jeff Loeb's story has gone on for two issues, without ANYTHING happening! Dull, dull and more dull.

Then pile on Civil War, and all of a sudden, I am not only bored, but repulsed. I used to like Ms. Marvel. Now I wouldn't spit on her if her face was on fire. Ditto for Tony Stark. And all the rest of the Pro-Registration douchebags.

Suddenly DC looks so charming in comparison. Yes, they are still killing off people and there is way too much gratuitous body-exploding violence, but at least their heroes are actually...heroic. And likeable. And Gail Simone brought back Ice! And Booster is getting his own book, and while Kyle has had a bad time of it lately, there is all kinds of stuff going on with the Green Lanterns. Power Girl is going to be the new chairman of the Justice Society, and Manhunter has been uncancelled again.

This isn't to say that DC is perfect however. I don't really like Supergirl at all, and the direction being taken with Mary Marvel makes me very very nervous.

I guess I'm saying that if I had a choice of living in the regular Marvel Universe, with all the drafting of superheroes...excuse me...Registration, and living in the DC Universe, I know which one I'd prefer.

Sorry to be so cranky today.

Monday, March 26, 2007

Thoughts about Ion

So...#12 has come out, and it is the end of the series, which has me slightly depressed. Although it started out a bit on the slow side, it certainly picked up momentum, and I enjoyed the further adventures of Kyle Rayner. I think that Ron Marz has a good handle on Kyle, and I enjoyed the art.

That said...Mr. Marz has certainly put poor Kyle through the ringer once again. The kid's going to get a complex! EVERYONE he gets close to...if they are female anyway...dies. Kyle is too sweet and pretty to have all this angst...it's going to give him wrinkles!

What I did rather enjoy, was the depiction of Kyle's increasingly cavalier attitude toward Grayven...who certainly deserves it. I don't know if it is because he's been hanging out too much with Guy recently or what, but Kyle does seem to be developing a bit of an edge. On the other hand, he's always been portrayed as having a temper. He's slow to anger, but when he finally does get mad...watch out.

Grayven is like a mean widdle kid...he just doesn't know when to quit...and Kyle eventually, and under a LOT of provocation finally has had enough, and does something rather drastic. He does stop short of popping Grayven's head off, but it's enough to freak out Donna, something fierce.

"Kyle? You didn't...I mean, he isn't...?" Donna asks rather nervously.

"I don't know. I don't care." Kyle replies with what appears to be an utter lack of emotion or
expression. I know it isn't without emotion, but he's just so pissed that he can't even start to show it. And then...just when he's trying to get back to Earth, to see his mother, a Monitor shows up.

Kyle just can't catch a break.

So, the Monitor starts doing his schtick...you pose a grave danger, blah, blah blah...when Kyle finally and completely runs out of patience, and gives him a Warrior-type blast from both arms.
The Monitor disappears, much to Donna's continued consternation. Kyle tells her that he didn't intend to blast him into smithereens, but that he's not particularly sorry either.

Donna and Kyle eventually do make it back to Earth, and fly in the window of his Mother's hospital room, where Guy, Kilowog and Soranik are waiting. Guy's looking all sad and concerned, which always thrills me to my marrow. But...but WHY did the artist give him that bloody haircut? All he's missing is a tonsure for heaven's sake! He hasn't worn his hair in the old "Moe" cut for QUITE some time, so it is really really annoying. Arrrghhh!

Ok...got that out of my system.

Anyway, Kyle's too late, his mom has died. Kyle promptly goes to pieces, which just breaks my heart, because I 'm such a sap. He then has a Hal Jordan moment, and decides that he can "fix" this. Both Guy and Kilowog try to talk him down, but he's starting to get a bit cranky, and does this glowing hands on his mom...and BRINGS HER BACK FROM THE DEAD!

Guy's jaw just about hits the floor, and the rest of them are equally kerfuffled. Kyle is getting seriously Parallax-like here, but even his mother realizes that it is all wrong. Kyle is trying to believe that everything will be all right, but Maura Rayner is no fool, and she convinces him that he can't do what he's trying to do. At least he does have the chance to say goodbye to her, which is the one bit of good fortune that he has, and then he lets her go.


There is a rather lovely four panel page of everyone at the funeral, while Kyle is thinking about all the things that have to be done, the mundane parts of getting the funeral together, disposing of her things and so on, and how there are people there to help you through the process. In the first panel of course, everyone is there, and in the succeeding panels, the number gets smaller and smaller, as they all have to go ahead and get on with their lives...and Kyle is finally all alone in the last one.

And he finally realizes that he's paid such a huge price for his power...and he's not really sure that it is worth it.

I really like Kyle, and I'm not sure that I am entirely happy with all the turmoil and pain that he's going through. Just once, I'd like to let the poor kid catch a break. It doesn't look as though things are going to be improving in the immediate future either, with the Sinestro Corps coming and all. Can we let Kyle go off and play with Guy for a while in Green Lantern Corps? They'll both feel better.

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Birds of Prey #104

Normally, I would be doing the Ion review right about now, but I'm still too giddy. I must admit that I'm still fairly new to the Birds, but I have been having a lovely time amongst the back issue boxes. I must say however, that Gail Simone is one heck of a writer. And Nicola Scott is an amazing artist.

As the issue opens, there is a little side bit, with an unidentified woman climbing a tower in Russia. Remember this, it becomes inportant later on.

Then we are in the jet, being piloted by my beloved Zinda. I just really like Zinda, I don't know why. Spy Smasher, Oracle's old buddy/enemy has managed to finagle her way into the team, and Oracle isn't too happy about it, but there isn't a whole lot she can do about it at the moment. Meanwhile, Barda is bleeding in her seat, from at least three bullet holes. She is of course, completely composed and even blase about the whole thing, while the rest of them are getting completely freaked out. Huntress lends her an arrow, for which she is quite grateful.

Then Huntress and Barda end up under-cover at a party in Azerbaijani of all places. They do look fabulous, in lovely formal gowns, and keep getting hit on by all the drooling male guests. They are supposed to be the bodyguards for Aleksandr Creote, but they are really there to make off with a certain piece of merchandise.

Meanwhile, the merchandise is being guarded by the Secret Six...which is just so perfect, that i can't stand it. Thomas Blake, aka Catman asks Helena, aka Huntress to dance, and they are flirting like mad, until he loses it...and licks her ear. He's mortified, and she's outraged, but it IS funny. Then she goes and throws a meatball at his head, and all is forgiven. I must say that Catman is GORGEOUS!

As the villain bloviates about Mother Russia and so on, Oracle warns Barda, that she's not the only one from Apokolips there, Knockout is also present, and this could cause a problem. Before Barda can make a discreet retreat, she's spotted, and whacks Knockout with her mega-rod.

Heh heh. Mega Rod! I love it.

She grabs the merchandise, which rather oddly turns out to be an old Rocket Red suit of armor, and runs for it. Helena grabs Thomas and plants a wet one on his lips and books as well. They all jump in a van with the suit of armor and hit the streets, closely followed by the rest of the Secret Six, in a really nice sports car. Alas, it stays a really nice sports car for only a few minutes, because it gets pounded into a pile of tin by...Hawkgirl! Tadaaaaaa! She was the unknown female figure waaaaaay back at the beginning. She expresses some regret for trashing the very nice car, and Oracle promises her a new one, which delights her...as well it should.

The rest of the Six are in a pickle, but never fear, since Scandal is on her way on a motorcycle, while wearing a tux no less. In the meantime, Helena and Barda figure that they had better open up the suit of armor, to make sure that it isn't a bomb or something.

This leads to one of the greatest final reveals that I have seen in a very long time. They open up the Rocket Red suit, and discover that there is a body inside. And it is Tora Olafsdottir, also known as Ice. From the Global Guardians. From the Justice League. Thought to have been killed by the Overmaster waaaaaaaay back when in one of the stupidest deaths of a hero ever. Not THE stupidest, but right up there.

And she's breathing.

I'm so happy I could plotz.

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Great Guardians, this was a great week for comics!

Wow! This was certainly a bonanza of a week for good books. I'm still all of a flutter.

Firstly, Ion #12. I'm happy that it was such a good issue, and sad that it's the last one. Oh, and Maura Rayner does die in the end, which is depressing. Poor Kyle. One more dead woman in his life. That boy just has the worst time of it with relationships. But on the other hand, his mom did last a lot longer than most of his girlfriends.

One small quibble. I've been enjoying having Guy, Kilowog and Soranik show up in Kyle's book, showing a little support and solidarity amongst the Green Lanterns. And I've been quite happy with the way that Ron Marz has portrayed Guy Gardner. However, I'm not at all thrilled that the artist in this issue, Fernando Pasarin chose to give Guy that goddamm haircut! He hasn't worn his hair like that since Hal went all Parallax on us...it's been years! Other than that however, the art was nice, and Kyle's grief very well displayed.

Secondly...The Brave and the Bold #2. Hoohah! I loved this. I even liked Supergirl in it, and that is saying something. Hal is hysterical, his frantic "No bad thoughts! She's seventeen!" and the way that he basically keeps repeating that is a hoot. Of course Kara is pretty shameless in her pursuit...Hal, you've still got it baby!

The Book of Destiny is a clever plot, using it to gamble is even better. The story is fun, the art is fun, what more could you ask for?

Thirdly...Justice Society of America #4. Man, this just keeps getting better and better. The boys and girls finally are in action, and have the evil Nazis on the run! Wildcat and Wildcat Jr. are beating up Vandal Savage! Power Girl gets to be chairman! The final double-page spread just gave me chills, it was so gorgeous. Dale Eaglesham did a lovely job with the artwork.

There are five women portrayed on that big splash page, and every single one of them has a different face and body type from the others. See? It CAN be done! The guys are the same way, Hawkman is absolutely HUGE in comparison to Jay, which is as it should be. Great stuff.

Finally...Birds of Prey #104. I am a somewhat of a newcomer to Birds of Prey, only having started getting it regularly as of issue 98, but I have been lurking around the back issue boxes and building up my collection, because it really is a great book. Gail Simone is an excellent writter, and I am quite happy with the art. But I really do like the characters. I miss Dinah a bit, but an having fun with Barda and her deadpan sense of humor.

I enjoyed Helena and Catman's flirting, Nicola Scott draws a VERY gorgeous Thomas Blake. I like the Secret Six too...I can't help thinking that when this arc is all over, they'll all go out and have a beer together.

However, the real zinger is on the last page. Barda and Helena have made off with the bad guy's secret weapon, which turns out to be a Rocket Red suit of armor, and are being pursued by the Secret Six. The two of them open up the armor, and it isn't empty, nor is it a bomb.

It's Ice.

Tora's not dead! I kid you not, I actually let out a scream of glee. Good thing I was the only one home, or my husband and kids would have me committed. I babbled about it all night. Please, please, let this stick...don't bring her back, just to kill her off again, I don't think my heart can stand it.

Guy and Bea are going to be so happy.

Oh yeah, I got some other stuff too. 52 was actually something of a hoot after all the blood and guts from last issue, I LOVE T.O Morrow bidding on ebay, while the rest of them are wetting their collective pants that Black Adam is going to pound them all into goo. Checkmate was good, Amanda Waller actually was thwarted. Wisdom was confusing but fun, as was Barracuda, both from Marvel. And I found the trade publication of Young Justice, with "Sins of Youth" which was fun all the way through.

Man, I'll be riding this glow for days.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Power Girl

There has been a bit of a kerfuffle lately on the various blogs and boards about the Michael Turner drawn cover of Power Girl, with Black Canary lurking moodily in the background. No, I'm not going to show it. You've already seen it...I know you have, and I have certain standards for Pete's sake.

Anyway...in standard Liefeld...OOPS...Turner fashion, there are NO hands or feet. Power Girl is facing the viewer, sort of, but all you can see are her GINORMOUS BREASTS! In typical Turner fashion, her torso has been drawn out and elongated, and these two incredible basket balls have been grafted awkwardly onto poor Kara's chest.

Ralph Dibney never looked this elongated.

Dinah is a bit pouty, because her breasts are only huge instead of insanely huge.

Enough is enough already. I like Power Girl. I've always liked her, I think that she's fun and sassy and tough, and she likes to hit things. I even like her cat. But there is so much more to her than her..."assets".

THIS is how Power Girl is supposed to look:


That is all.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Green Lanterns and Fatherhood

Over at "Pretty Fizzy Paradise", Kalinara has been speculating lately about the possibility of Hal Jordan having children. She went further and postulated that Hal may have a gay son, which I find hilarious, and getting smacked around verbally and probably physically by Alan Scott. I really find this to be an interesting concept.

First, I'm not sure that Hal has had any real contact with Todd...or Jade for that matter. They weren't really around too much before he went all Parallax, and then he was the Spectre, and lately he's had his hands full since "Rebirth". So, I can see him making some stupid comment, and being royally schooled by Alan. And that would be fun, because Alan is about one of the only people in the Universe, who can make Hal Jordan sit up and behave.

Anyway, I find the concept of Hal having a plethora of illegitimate, half-alien children to be compelling...and funny. I can't believe that he doesn't have a least a couple squirrelled away somewhere. He's been at this whole Green Lanterning thing for quite a while now...if Ollie can have grown children, so can Hal.

Actually however, I think that I would prefer Hal to get dumped with a baby...mainly because he'd go completely to pieces. He'd try to con any number of available women to take over for him, either Arisia, Cowgirl, Carol, Dinah, etc. Failing any competent women, he'd try to pawn the little beggar off on his fellow Green Lanterns. This would probably not work. Seriously, can you see Hal and Kyle and a crying baby? Haw!

Of course what would happen, is that Guy and John would take over, because Hal and Kyle can't be trusted to feed goldfish, much less a baby. John would be competent and efficient, because that is what John is. And Guy, well he did used to be a teacher, plus we all know that he's really just a big softie underneath all the crusty, testosterone-laden exterior.

Of course, we could expand this whole idea, and bring in the whole darn Green Lantern Corps. Kilowog would probably be fantastic with kids. Salakk would be horrified of course, but quite handy, with all those extra arms. Soranik would be good at the immunizations and ear infections, but I don't really see her as being particularly maternal. Boodika on the other hand...would be hilarious.

The Guardians would probably make them give the poor little mite back though. "I don't care if it did follow you home, give it back to Jordan!"

Sunday, March 18, 2007

Upcoming Green Lantern Annual

This is the cover to the Green Lantern annual, which I believe will be out in June. Ethan Van Sciver is the artist...and it is utterly amazing.

Green Lanterns

It is also a clever take on one of the covers from "Rebirth". I wasn't bright enough to figure this out on my own, but it has been pointed out several times over on the Geoff Johns message board, and I do agree.

Sinestro is up to no good. Strange and scary things are going to be happening in Green Lantern and Green Lantern Corps, and the Sinestro Corps are going to be running amok. This can only be good news for the rest of us.

Saturday, March 17, 2007


Booster Gold

I am giddy with delight. Giddy, I tells ya!

Over on Newsarama, it has been revealed that none other than Geoff Johns, Green Lantern author extraordinaire, is going to be doing a new Booster Gold book. He has quite a number of interesting ideas for the direction of the book.

"What else can I say? A bar fight with Jonah Hex, the world's greates Green Lantern Guy Gardner's first day on the job, the Justice League International, Rip Hunter, a last page that will rival Justice Society of America's, ...and Supernova?"

Now, if they could only get Kevin Maguire to do the art, I could die happy.

Friday, March 16, 2007

Gosh, but I love Kilowog

I'm not quite sure if I can explain the deep passion that I have for the Green Lantern's favorite drill sargeant, but I sure do love Kilowog.

Green Lantenrs

For one thing, he is an amazing visual. It can't be easy trying to come up with really interesting Aliens, and the Green Lanterns books are ALL about Aliens. But Kilowog just stands out for some reason. For one thing, he's REALLY big, over 7' tall, if I remember, and built accordingly, so there is definitely some major physical presence there.

In addition, his face is just amazingly original...at least in my eyes. Yes, he looks vaguely hippo-ish, but I think that is mainly because of his ears. His mouth is cool, with the little flesh thingies, and his massive jaw, and his little red eyes and bat-like nose all shouldn't work together...except that they do.

Plus, "Poozer" is just a neat word to say.

Mainly though, I like Kilowog, because he is an interesting character. He's certainly been around for a while now. He's the lone survivor of his planet, which was destroyed, restored and destroyed by Sinestro. He's managed to survive this disaster with a fair amount of grace and humility. Unlike Hal, he didn't go nuts and go on a killing spree. Like the good soldier that he is, he hid his pain, straightened up, and got back to work. He terrorizes the rookies, but it is for their own good, under that massive and forbidding exterior, he has the requisite heart of gold. Heck he even manages to get along with Salakk.

And, he's Guy Gardner's best friend. Actually, they are a lot alike, which may help explain it. Although he is friends with Hal, and John and Kyle, I've never really liked the way that Hal used to treat him. Kilowog had a bit of a crush on Arisia, and Hal would dismiss his feelings and call him "simple", which I always thought was pretty uncaring. but that's just Hal being Hal. Kilowog was also been good about looking after Kyle, which is a good thing...Kyle frequently needs looking after.

I love the fact that apparently he likes donuts, and coffee. Does he have them imported from Earth, or do they manage to replicate them on Oa? I think that it's funny that he is finding himself a bit flustered when it comes to dealing with Iolande. As a royal princess, she has absolutely NO problem with questioning his authority, and he's not used to that. If we need some new romantic entanglements, THAT would be a fun pairing.

So, I'm a little bit worried about him and what is happening in the latest Green Lantern Corps, with what appears to be the first cracks in the foundation of Oa from Sinestro. However, being Kilowog, I'm sure that eventually, he'll kick some bad guy tail, and yell "Poozer!" a lot.

As well he should.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Green Lantern Corps #10

Well...ok, I've got to break down and admit that as much as I love this book, it was a bit of a letdown after the taut, edge-of-your-seat storytelling that Keith Champagne gave us in the last three issues. This tale tends to ramble a bit, and while there are some very nice moments, it seems to all be setup.

First of all, EVERYONE is acting like idiots for some reason. Salakk is having an absolute hissy fit for some reason, and has once again banned Guy from any shore leave for another year. Excuse me?

Soranik is lurking on Korugar, dispensing small bits of justice and medicine, trying to change her people's minds about the Green Lanterns. Kilowog and Iolande show up to save her, but she's not particularly grateful, and she and Iolande practically start clawing each others eyes out at one point.

Kilowog is feeling very cranky.

Guy has to go off and help out two guys, Quond and Tanakata Z rescue some bugs and fix their hive. Right from the start, the two Lanterns are mean and rude, and Guy isn't any better. What the heck is going on?

Vath takes Isamot to Mogo for some quality time, and he runs into Green Man, who is acting very strangely. In fact with the exception of Isamot...EVERYONE is acting strangely! Finally, Kilowog goes off to visit Mogo too, and flies right through a sinister yellow cloud of little glowing...thingies.

What I think is happening, is that certain ramifications of the machinations of the Sinestro Corps are making themselves felt...in strange, small and weird ways. I guess that is why everyone is acting so unpleasant.

The art was a bit confusing in this issue as well. Pat Gleason does some of it, and Dave Gibbons does the rest. Both are excellent artists, but their respective styles are very very different, so it is a bit jarring to see them juxtaposed on the pages.

Nevertheless, there are some small fun moments. For one thing, Boodika shows up, in a group with Kilowog, Brik and Ke'haan, which is fun. She even seems to be flirting in a way with Guy, and I SWEAR that she and Brik are ogling Guy's behind as he flies off.

And there is a magnificent shot of Kilowog yelling "ENOUGH!" at Iolande and Soranik, spittle flying and crushing his coffee mug in his hand, that just cracks me up...the looks on all of their faces is priceless.

So...things are looking rather ominous. I want to slap Salakk, Guy is behaving like a two-year old, and the other Lanterns aren't behaving a whole lot better. But there is a whole lot more Kilowog, which is a good thing.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Equal Opportunity Leering

Now THAT is one fine behind. Granted, it does not belong to a Green Lantern, but never let it be said that I do not appreciate high quality male buttocks on a different hero. Oh, and Wonder Woman looks nice too.


Usually Wally is a bit of a blur. I think that's Wally. Is that Wally? They should definitely bring back Wally West...and Linda and the kids and stuff. I always found Bart to be much more appealing as Impulse. He's lost too much of his joie de vivre lately.

Anyway...speaking of fine behinds. You FLAUNT IT Hal!

Hal Pictures

Oh Hal. Displaying your buns and getting hit in the head at the same time. It's a two-fer!

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

A little Guy love

I have absolutely nothing important to say today. It is the day before the new books come out, and it is three days before payday, it is raining, and life is a little on the blah side at the moment. Therefore, I present to you Guy Gardner, and assorted bad guys.

Guy pictures

Because Guy Gardner punching people always puts a smile on my face.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

I think that Keith Champagne is my favorite new writer

If you have been reading the last couple of posts, you may have noticed that I have been a bit on the grumpy side lately. Captain America's "death" has only increased this feeling of pessimism on my part. Or, to put it bluntly...STOP killing everybody off already! It's old, it's boring, and it has lost most of its impact!

Which brings me in a roundabout way, to the latest three episodes of Green Lantern Corps, as written by Mr. Champagne. Entitled "the Dark Side of the Green", it has a super secret branch of the Green Lantern corps, called the Corpse, which handles all the nasty things that the regular Lanterns and Guardians don't want to touch. We end up with two very interesting new characters, Von Daggle, a Durlan, who with his utter lack of morals and cold intelligence is more than capable of handling anything that the Guardians throw at him, and R'amey Holl, the adorable little butterfly woman from Papilliox, who originally comes in as Guy Gardner's partner.

Mr. Champagne of course, puts Guy through the wringer, and has a deft and sure touch with him as a character, his motivations and dialogue are simply priceless. But what REALLY enchanted me, is his take on R'amey.

At first I thought she was a bit of a lightweight, a rookie, and the obligatory female protential victom. Afterall, she gets taken out by Von Daggle in about 30 seconds at the beginning of the story. Plus, she's just so darned...cute! She has braids and freckles and pretty pretty butterfly wings. However, the more that we see of her, the more interesting she gets. She rather successfully manipulates both Guy and Daggle, and while she may be a Green Lantern rookie, she is certainly no novice...as she herself points out.

Then she gets disembowelled by the villain. And my first thought, was "Oh crap!" I LIKED R'amey, and was quite disappointed that she seemed to be ready for that old refridgerator in the sky. The only redeeming thing was that Guy seemed to be in just as bad of shape, so Mr. Champagne was apparently an equal opportunity killer.

And then a funny thing happened. R'amey falls at the foot of the artifact that has evolved the Dominator, who is the original villain...and she doesn't die. We see her in a glowing cocoon, from which she emerges beautiful and powerful. Guy doesn't rescue her, SHE rescues HIM. She's now capable of creating black holes, she can heal Guy's mind...and still is "human" enough to confess her schoolgirl-like crush on him. And while Guy is the one who defeats the bad guy, SHE'S the one who rips him into little vilain pieces...while Guy stands there with his mouth open. Furthermore, she's the one who erases his memory of the whole episode...although I get the impression that she regrets having to do it.

And what do we end up with at the conclusion? Guy has had a REALLY bad couple of days, the Guardians have the Corpse back, and Von Daggle has a new recruit. And R'amey Holl ISN'T DEAD! She's grown and evolved and is stronger and more interesting than ever. And she didn't even get raped. Yes, there was some blood and violence along the way, but only in service of the story, and I don't think that any of it was gratuitous. The art by Pat Gleeson was sensational as usual, but the prettiest art in the world isn't going to be enough is the story isn't a strong one...and this is a strong one.

So...can we have some more of this please? Beautiful art and story-telling. It isn't really that difficult of a concept.

Friday, March 09, 2007

Manhunter #29...Waaahhhh!

Ok, Manhunter's not being cancelled...and that's a good thing. But...but it WASN'T really Blue Beetle either. Of course, deep in my heart of hearts I knew this, and yet...I really really miss Ted Kord.

It turned out to be that creepy Everyman guy, from 52. On the other hand, I thought they settled his hash a couple of weeks ago, when Steel put a serious whuppin' on Lex Luthor. So he gets knocked off the building by Kate, and maybe THIS time, he's really dead. But I wouldn't count on it.

Nevertheless, I do wish they'd bring Beetle back. Booster Gold is probably lonely. Actually, I'm just hoping that Booster makes it through 52 as well, since they killed off poor Ralph. This decimation of the old JLI really has to stop. Who the heck is left? Guy Gardner of course,although I think that he's fairly safe on Oa for the moment. Besides, they killed him off once before and it didn't take. If I were Fire, I'd be worried, she's in Checkmate, but seems to be a bit out of control at the moment, not to mention being blackmailed by Amanda Waller. J'onn J'onnz is still wandering around, so is Black Canary, and I think that Mr. Miracle is lurking somewhere. Barda seems to be safe over in Birds of Prey.

But it is getting bad when you look at a page of heroes from JLI, and more of them are now dead than alive. What is the point of creating wonderful characters, only to kill them off? Stop killing them off! The rapes and decapitations can also be put in mothballs. I know, how about coming up with some interesting stories instead?

Sorry for what turned out to be a rant, but I'm REALLY crabby today.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Things could be worse

Looking at the state of modern comics, and the place of women therein, I am not particularly thrilled. On the other hand, I was browsing through some of my old (very old) books the other day, and believe me, things could be a heck of a lot worse. We could still be written by Stan Lee for example.

I like Stan Lee. I think that he revolutionized comics back in the day, and he seems like a charming and personable ambassador for comics to this day. But I really really dislike the way that he used to write women. Granted, this was back in the 60's and social mores were different...and yet...! I read Susan Storm, or Jean Grey, or Wanda for example, and don't know whether or not to laugh or cry.

A Stan Lee girl...they weren't Women yet...is a simpering, weeping, clinging mess. The Invisible Girl, spent most of her time wringing her hands and swooning. Wanda was a disaster, completely dominated by her obnoxious brother, she had a pretty cool power, but spent most of her time wringing her hands and swooning. Jean Grey was slightly more competent, but only marginally. None of them ever waded into the fight and actually got their hands dirty, they had mental powers, or at least less physical powers. Mostly, their contributions were to stand there and wave their hands at the bad guys. And get kidnapped. A lot.

What is even worse, is the behavior of the men. Reed Richards was apparently ALWAYS a dick, at least in the beginning. He's always yelling at Sue to stop being a "Female"! Johnny and Ben aren't a whole lot better. Over in Avengers, Pietro basically spends most of his time telling Wanda to shut up and stay out of the way. Janet Van Dyne, the Wasp, isn't treated any better, she's an empty-headed socialite, either shopping, flirting or scheming of ways to get Hank Pym to marry her.

Over at DC, I think that things were actually a bit better. You had Lois Lane of course, who was also scheming to get Superman to marry her, but at least she DID things, she was a reporter and a lunatic, but by God, she had spunk. I liked Iris West, and Carol Ferris was a career woman, which was rather unnusual for the time. Of course they all got kidnapped and rescued a lot. At least they weren't getting raped...yet.

There was a particular Avengers story that has always driven me nuts. Actually I think this one may have been written by Roy Thomas instead of Stan, but it is still basically a Harlequin romance book in comic form. Arkon, the ruler of another planet kidnaps Wanda to Be His Bride. Of course, she feebly resists, and then swoons and starts to fall for him, when she's rescued by the rest of the Avengers. Hawkeye actually tells her, it's ok, she's just a Female! Not once does she lift a finger to defend herself, or even help the rest of the Avengers when they finally show up. She does cry a lot though.

So...things have improved over the years. Women are actually allowed to fight and throw a punch and rescue the heroes. Of course bad things are happening to them, and the level of bad seems to have escalated enormously. At first you just had Denny O'Neill, and his weird fixation with putting women in wheelchairs. I never could figure that little quirk out, but apparently during the time that he was writing Hard Travelling Heroes, he was going through a nasty divorce and drinking a lot. *Ahem*

Now we just have them getting raped and decapitated. I'm not sure that this is progress. At least Sue isn't swooning so much anymore.

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Why G'not?

Aaahhh...my favorite idiotic Green Lantern. The immortal G'nort Esplenade G'neeesmacher.

Green Lanterns

For some reason, G'nort doesn't seem to get a whole lot of respect. Part of it, I suppose, is because he's kind of...stupid. He's also a dog. Dressed up in a Green Lantern suit. With a tail. But I have always found G'nort rather heartwarming, which is why I am resolutely refusing to admit the "Collateral Damage" by Howard Chaykin ever happened.

What G'nort has going for him, is that he is unabashedly, completely, totally in love with Guy Gardner...but in a manly sort of doggy way. Afterall, they've fought Qwardians together, Guy got G'nort into the Green Lantern Corps (and gave the Guardians a good chuckle along the way), while G'nort gave Guy is very first bone, Guy has scratched G'nort behind the ears, and sent him off to chase comets. It's kind of sweet really. Hal Jordan should be so lucky. He doesn't have a G'newtian sniffing HIS butt.

G'nort hasn't been around much lately, and it is rather a shame (Collateral Damage does not exist...lalalalalalala I can't hear you!) He's a character that I would LOVE to see Geoff Johns tackle. End result...hilarity!

Monday, March 05, 2007

The SHARK goes on the Prowl Again!

That is the title to Green Lantern, Vol II, #28, and words can barely describe the utter lunacy of the story therein.

We begin with Hal, Carol, Pieface and Terga surfing off of Malibu. Yes...surfing. And boy do they have that surfing lingo down.

As Carol Ferris "takes the drop" she loses her balance and begins to "wipe out"...

"Oops! I'm taking gas!" gasps Carol.

I don't know what that means, but it certainly sounds funny. Hal immediately leaps to rescue his boss, but she...disappears! Then we have not one but TWO butt shots of Hal diving into the waves, where out of sight of Pieface and Terga, he summons his Green lantern costume. The artist actually draws it floating in the water.

Next...and this is the supreme moment in the entire issue for me...Hal floats above the water, to search for Carol, he creates a giant glowing green...CLAM RAKE! But instead of scooping up Carol, he discovers none other than the nefarious SHARK! Hal tries to imprison the Shark, but forgets about his "yellow aura"!

The Shark then stands there and in great detail, explains that he's kidnapped Carol, Pieface and Terga...because Hal is his FAVORITE ENEMY! Aawwww...that's just so special! He then goes on for a couple more pages about his history, how he became the shark, how much smarter he is than Green Lantern, blah blah blah. Meanwhile, Hal has actually managed to find his friends and free them. Then he hides them on a green platform in the clouds.

This works for about 30 seconds before the Shark "strips away that cloud...to form yellow hail stones!" Yuck. But not to worry, because Hal makes two giant green tuning forks, which discombobulates the Shark long enough for Hal to save his hapless buddies once again. The Shark, foiled, actually shakes his fist and claims that he doesn't mind, it only makes his ultimate victory THAT MUCH SWEETER! This is absolutely priceless dialogue, and only available in comics.

So, the Shark, making his own stream of water above the city, goes hunting for Hal again, and they fight and stuff, and of course the Shark knocks Hal unconcious. He even probes his mind, to make sure that he's not faking, then lays him down and tries to take the ring off of his finger, when "Abruptly, Green Lanterns' arm shoots straight out for the Shark's jaw...! Knocked cold by that powerful blow, the Shark slides limply to the ground beside his foe (for Green Lantern is still unconcious)...!" Hal beats him up while he's unconcious! Now let's see Batman top that!

They both lie there for a while, but Hal wakes up first and of course completely vanquishes his enemy, by turning him back into a regular shark, and putting him in the Aquarium. Exactly how he manages to accomplish all of this is not explained, nor, if he could simply turn him back into a shark, why did they fight in the first place?

Meanwhile, Carol is sobbing her little heart out, because she thinks that poor Hal has drowned while searching for her. But Green Lantern assures her that although he forgot to tell her in all of the excitement, no need to worry, he fished Hal out before the fight and everything is just peachy.

So, the next day, they all decide to go surfing again! These people just never learn. Carol goes leaping into the waves, leaving Hal and Pieface sitting on the beach, wherein Hal explains that his real ring was invisible, and he had made a fake ring, and then re-enacts the whole thing lying there on the beach with Pieface...which quite frankly looks really perverted, but what do I know.

Anyway...they sure don't write stories like this anymore...which is probably a good thing.

Saturday, March 03, 2007

Aaaahhh...The Silver Age Green Lantern

So...I was fortunate enough to find the second volume of Showcase presents Green Lantern at my local Comic shoppe, and it is a fabulous read. I don't know what kind of drugs these guys were using, but I want some. You have Barry West as the Flash, the Tatooed Man, Hector Hammond, the Shark, Sonar, Star Stapphire, and oodles more.

And of course plenty of butt shots, as Hal flails about clumsily through the air. I can definitely understand why John is considered to be a better flyer than Hal, in a lot of these stories, he certainly looks a bit ungainly.

Hal Pictures

Now really Hal. Not particularly graceful are we?

Hal Pictures

Hal also gets attacked by giant tentacle monsters (ALWAYS fun!) giant lizards, and giant giants. Say what you will about Hal's tendancy to leap into action without any sort of plan or thought or even sanity occasionally...he does come through in the end.

Thursday, March 01, 2007

Green Lantern #17

Wow! Just wow.

I have to admit that I was getting a little bit fed up with Hal lately. The whole bounty hunter thing, being a POW, and all seemed to be dragging a tad. But I take it all back with this issue.

Right off the bat, (heh) we have Batman talking to the rest of the Justice League, who are getting the Global Guardians defried, and Hal's name cleared, while Bats is out doing a little urban renewal. Then from out of the blue comes the yellow Sinestro ring that has been making its way to earth. It declares that since Batman inspires great fear, that he is now inducted into ...the Sinestro Corps! Boy howdy, I did not see that coming.

Batman manages to fend the ring off, helped by the fact that Hal had let him use his Green Lantern ring earlier, so the Sinestro ring rejects Batman, and flies off looking for another subject. I will say that Ivan Reis draws a fabulous-looking Batman, while the color just glow...along with with ring-induced bats, which I thought was a really neat touch.

And then, we jump right into the action back where we last left Hal, dressed in his flight suit, his ring depowered, and being loomed over by a very peeved Amon Sur. Hunger Dog is also there, making sure that he gets his bounty, and the little bug-guy, named Loragg, who is holding the head of a Manhunter. I can't help but imagine that Loragg sounds just like Peter Lorre.

Well, Amon Sur is being quite the pain, bloviating on in proper super-villain fashion. His father wasn't there for him, it's all Hal's fault, and the Green Lantern Corps, blah, blah, blah. He makes Hal take him to where his father Abin Sur was buried, digs up the corpse and gets all weepy.

Nobody in my opinion can whine quite like Hal Jordan when he gets going, but in this case, even Hal is revolted. Loragg (in Peter Lorre's voice) keeps urging Amon Sur to kill Hal, but Hal, bless his heart just taunts him about what a big coward he really is. Amon Sur of course doesn't take this particularly well, and after a bit more boasting, he knocks Hal flat on his magnificent buttocks and takes a blast at him...

...Which is intercepted by none other than Hunger Dog, who in a really fabulous splash page, is revealed to be... John Stewart! Woohoo! Actually I had pretty well guessed that Hunger Dog was John by this point, but still, it was so nice to see him again. Plus he and Hal have some rather fun banter together. Then, sans ring, Hal goes for Amon Sur and proceeds lay down some serious whup-ass, even summoning up some nice Batman-like moves.

Then the Sinestro Corps ring...you remember the Sinestro Corps ring?...shows up and decides that Amon Sur is just the ticket. Amon Sur, being the bad guy, is of course delighted and is all ready to use his new power against Hal and John, when the ring decides to take him for training, which really ticks him off.

Hal and John are left standing in a crater as Amon Sur disappears, then we switch to a lovely quiet scene on Ungara, which was Abin Sur's home planet. Hal has brought Abin's body home and raised an appropriate memorial, which is a nice touch. Hal may be slow sometimes, but he does get it eventually.

Finally, he goes to see how Cowgirl is doing, and to angst a bit more about how the airforce base had been ripped up by Amon Sur. Cowgirl essentially tells him to lighten up...Hal. Guess she's a bit brighter than Carol.

Speaking of which, Star Sapphire is shown on the last page, right outside Ferris Air. Won't that be interesting?

The art was gorgeous, and ditto for the coloring, while the story zipped along nicely, and with fun bits of dialogue. Amon Sur is a bit long-winded, but that's his job.

Very very good.